Fortune Cookies
by voi ch'intrate
Summary: Fortune cookie says: 'The one you love is closer than you think'...or is it? For one college student and one new doctor it just may be. AU AH
1. I Hate Surprises

**Disclaimer for this entire story, because I hate typing disclaimers and I don't own Twilight. So there.**

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Chapter 1: I Hate Surprises

"_A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again."  
-__Enid Bagnold_

I'd always been a bit of a Daddy's girl, but sometimes it can be utterly pathetic. Charlie has always looked out for me, was always my Number One Guy. But as the years passed me by I started to realize that maybe I needed a drastic change.

At sixteen, I lived life repeating a movie line like a mantra. "The only man a girl can depend on is her daddy." Frenchy had that right. That line was what I repeated at the homecoming dance when toe-headed, baby-faced Mike Newton tried to put his hands under my dress. He couldn't be trusted, none of those hormonal, squeaky-voiced boys could.

But as Sweet Sixteen and Never Been Kissed morphed into Not-So-Sweet Seventeen and Seriously Never Been Kissed, and when that gave way to eighteen and then nineteen followed in quick succession, I was beginning to see a pattern.

I would have to drop the Grease quote and go for something different. Something about stepping out of the box and trying different things—but nothing came to mind, and that was why I found my current existence quite dismal.

It was early September, my twenty-first birthday to be exact. And my dad, Charlie, was taking me out to dinner. It wasn't lost on me that I was so pathetic and antisocial that my own father had to take me out to celebrate my twenty-first year.

He took me to a little Chinese restaurant downtown. It was tastefully decorated in red's and gold's and large, winding dragons that curled over the walls—their jaws open and their eyes wide.

A petite Asian woman seated us at a booth near the buffet. It smelled good, like steamed rice and spicy food. Charlie wasn't a big fan of Chinese food, but ever since I started college I've developed a taste for General Tso's Chicken—mainly because I ate an alarming amount of takeout our freshman year—so my father decided to treat me to a personal favourite.

"Happy birthday," Charlie said with an awkward cough, sliding a clumsily wrapped gift across the black lacquer table. It was kind of lumpy and had about an entire roll of tape haphazardly wrapped around the pink patterned wrapping paper.

I smiled tentatively at my father, "Thanks." I tried to unwrap it but to no avail. I ended up having to cut about three layers of Scotch tape away with my butter knife before I could even think about pulling the wrapping paper away.

When I finally got down to the actual present, I could tell that it was vaguely square-shaped and heavy. I pulled the final layer of tape and paper away to reveal an old book, a beautifully bound copy of Wuthering Heights. I could feel a prick at my eyes, like tears swimming behind the lids.

"Thank you," I breathed, turning the beautiful little book over in my hands, caressing the stiff, old pages.

Charlie shifted uncomfortably, "I was at that old antique shop downtown and the little lady that works there showed me to the books in the back. She said that this one was in the best condition. I told her you were an English Literature major, and she seemed to think you'd like it."

I smiled a watery smile at my father and leaned across our table to wrap my arms around his stiff shoulders. His hands came up timidly and patted my back. "I'm glad you like it, Bells."

"I love it!" I exclaimed, sitting back down in my chair and hugging the book to my chest. In all my years of living with Charlie I'd never known him to give such a thoughtful gift. He never forgot my birthday, or Christmas or anything—but he always got gift cards or gave me money, citing that he didn't know what I would like so I could get my gift myself.

I was dabbing my tears away with my bright red, cloth napkin when our waitress came back with our drink orders. I was tempted to push my luck and order one of the alcoholic beverages the menu served for those over the age of twenty-one, but I figured I wouldn't try. I didn't want to give Charlie a heart attack. I knew he was a little upset that his baby was getting older, so I figured I'd pick myself up a bottle of wine when Charlie wasn't around and experiment by myself.

"Are you ready to order?" Our waitress asked in heavily accented English. I hadn't even had time to look through my menu properly, so I gestured to my father and let him order first.

He took the easy way out, "I'll have the buffet."

Our waitress nodded and turned expectant, dark eyes on me, "I'll have the buffet, too."

She nodded, told us to help ourselves and disappeared behind a set of ornate, swinging doors that I assumed led to the kitchen.

Charlie grinned at me and swung his legs around the booth to go attack the buffet, I followed close behind him after tucking my precious gift into my bag.

My father and I loaded our plates with spicy chicken, and rice and noodles and meat of unidentifiable origin—we ate like royalty, because after all, it was a special occasion.

I was halfway through my second plate of beef lo mein when Charlie started to wring his napkin between his thick fingers.

"Everything, ok, Dad?" I asked.

"Well, there's something I want to talk to you about, Bella." He said, not meeting my eyes. That was never a good sign.

"What is it?" I asked, fidgeting uselessly.

"Well, you remember Sue Clearwater from down on the reservation, right?" He asked, his face reddening. He smoothed down the sides of his mustache, "Well, we've been seeing each other for a while now."

I felt all the colour drain from my face. How did I not know that? My own father had been keeping a woman a secret from me. I flushed angrily, was I not to be trusted? Was that why he hadn't told me about his secret flame?

"Don't be mad, Bella," my father sighed. "I didn't know how serious things were so I kept it from you."

"Things are serious?!" I demanded, slamming my chopsticks against the tabletop.

Charlie blushed and that was all the answer I needed. I fumed at him silently, "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I don't know," he sighed, picking at the food left on his plate.

I felt betrayed by my own father, I shared everything with him. Ever since Renee abandoned us years ago he'd been Mother and Father to me. And right now, I didn't even know him. He was some other different person wearing my father's skin.

I tried not to let the hurt tears swell in my eyes, "So what are you trying to tell me?"

"She's the one who told me to tell you about us, she wants to have a family dinner on Monday night," he said, still looking anywhere but my eyes.

"A family dinner!" I screeched. My family consisted of me and Charlie nothing more, nothing less.

Charlie flushed, "Isabella, she has two kids around your age; she would really like it if we got all of you guys together just so you could meet and get to know each other."

"But it's not a family dinner," I protested, feeling very childish and hurt, "it's just a get-together of two sets of families. We're not one big happy family!"

Charlie looked hurt, and I immediately regretted having blown up at him. He was lonely and I knew it—but it wasn't fair! My own father had a more romantic life than I had. I was jealous and upset and for once in my life I longed for the mother I didn't really know.

"I'm sorry, Bells. I shouldn't have sprung this on you. Not on your birthday at least," he said with a sigh, tossing his napkin onto his plate. "Let's just go home."

"You go on ahead," I told him. We'd driven separately because he had come straight from work, and I was thankful for it. At least he wouldn't have an excuse to make me go with him.

"Bella," he protested, standing beside me. I glared at the menu in front of me, reading the little Zodiac fortunes on it.

I sensed him leave my side and a moment later I heard the bells above the door jingle as he left. I started to cry once he was gone. This was why I hated my birthday, because no matter how good it began, it always ended just the same. Me crying alone, my heart throbbing painfully in my chest—bizarrely empty for some inexplicable reason.

I read over my fortune on the placemat, I was born in the year of the Rabbit.

'The Rabbit symbolizes such character traits as creativity, compassion, and sensitivity. Rabbits are friendly, outgoing and prefer the company of others. They also prefer to avoid conflict. In confrontational situations, Rabbits approach calmly and with consideration for the other party. Rabbits believe strongly in friends and family and lacking such bonds can lead to emotional issues.'

I started to laugh through my tears, emotional issues for sure.

I continued reading, 'The Rabbit is most compatible with the Pig and the Dog.'

Where were all the pigs and dogs when you really wanted to find one? I asked myself. There really was no use, they didn't exist.

I sifted through my purse and pulled the copy of Wuthering Heights out, flipping through pages, trying to see through my tear-blurry eyes.

'You teach me how cruel you've been - cruel and false. Why do you despise me? Why did you betray your own heart, Cathy? I have not one word of comfort. You deserve this. You have killed yourself. Yes, you may kiss me, and cry, and wring out my kisses and tears; they'll blight you - they'll damn you. You loved me—then what right had you to leave me? What right—answer me—for the poor fancy you felt for Linton? Because misery, and degradation and death, and nothing that God or Satan could inflict would have parted us, you, of your own will, did it. I have not broken your heart—you have broken it.'

I threw the book across the table and stood up; I paid for our dinner at the counter at the front, irrationally upset that I had to pay for my own birthday dinner. The hostess stared at me and my tear-stained cheeks, but didn't say anything.

I brushed out of the door, still crying quietly to myself and all I could think of was that I'd broken my own heart.

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**So, here's the beginning to my new story. I've gotten the first 10 chapters written thus far, and so I've decided to update this story EVERY 5 DAYS. So, that means the next update for this story will be on Tuesday, July 21. I'll try my hardest to have the next chapter out then, but I'm going to be on vacation and I have no idea if the house I'm staying at has Internet. But if all else fails I know there's a cafe around there that has really good smoothies and wireless. I'll try to get over there and update.**

**I didn't write the information on the placemat. I copy and pasted it from ChineseZodiac (dot) com.**

**So, out of curiosity, what's everyone's Chinese Zodiac sign? I'm a Monkey. **


	2. Chinese Sugar

**Chapter 2: Chinese Sugar**

"_The real enemy can always be met and conquered, or won over. Real antagonism is based on love, a love which has not recognized itself."  
__-Henry Miller_

"Come on, Edward! Please, come with me!" Alice begged of me. I held up one finger, signaling her to give me one more moment of solace.

I could tell from the tremor in her voice that she was in desperate need of backup, but truth be told, I was getting rather tired of being my little sister's wingman. She was a big girl, she could go by herself.

I would prefer to stay home, fully immersed and drowning in music and good literature, but Alice was bent on making me go with her to whatever function she was attending.

I tried to read through the next paragraph in the medical text book I had borrowed from my father, I was currently reading through the chapter about parasitic diseases and found the topic to be morbidly fascinating.

Alice was less-than-enthused with my current fascination with intestinal parasites, but she generally kept quiet about her distaste; but, my blowing her off to continue reading about cestoda, or tapeworm the gut-dwelling worm was the straw that broke the camel's back.

She ripped the thick tome from my hands and threw it to the ground, in typical Alice-temper-tantrum fashion. I stifled a roll of the eyes.

"What do you want, sister dear?" I asked, keeping my voice even, despite being pissed off beyond belief inside.

"I need you to come on my date with me," she said, her arms crossed dangerously across her chest.

"You know, Alice, most little girls would deter their big brothers from coming on their dates with them." I replied, scooting to the edge of my chair to make a dive for my book.

She tapped her foot—sheathed in a deadly-looking shoe—at me, "I don't want you to sit at the table with us, just sit in the booth behind ours and if I say the code-word you get up, spill some drink on me so I have an excuse to split of this guy is a total loser."

"Alice, don't you think you're underestimating your date a little?" I asked, sticking the tip of my foot out to try to slide my book closer.

"Edward Anthony!" My dearest sister-demon exclaimed, kicking the book just out of my reach, "I'm serious! What if he's a rapist or something and I'm his next victim, you'd hate yourself forever because you refused to come with me."

"Isn't this Rosalie's cousin that you're going out with?" I queried, forgetting about my book and fishing around in my pocket for my iPod touch.

Alice blushed prettily and one of the corners of her mouth twitched upwards, "Yes."

"Would Rosalie really set you up with a rapist, an axe-murderer or a fashion victim?" I asked, unwrapping the white headphones from around my iPod.

"No, she wouldn't," Alice mumbled, "but that doesn't change the fact that I want you to come along!"

I sighed and shook my head, "What restaurant are you going to?"

"He's taking me to the Chinese place downtown," she said.

I groaned; I hated the Chinese place. It was so fake and disgusting and most likely unsanitary, we'd probably go home with cestoda inhabiting our bellies. Alice glared at me, her light brown eyes narrowing and I sighed in resignation. I really couldn't say 'no' to my little sister, she was really all I had.

"When should I be ready to leave?" I asked.

Alice bounced back on her heels and clapped her hands together, "Jasper, Rose's cousin, is meeting me at the restaurant at seven."

"Alright," I sighed and stood up, leaning backwards to crack my back. Alice ran up the stairs ahead of me, by the time I arrived at the threshold of my door she was already fishing around in my closet tossing a shirt out, followed by pants and then a pair of socks, and even a pair of boxers flew out of my closet followed by my petite sister.

"I do have perfectly good underwear already on, you know," I responded.

She sighed and glared at me, "What if you bend over and someone catches a glimpse of your boxers, they should at least match the rest of your outfit."

I stared, open-mouthed at her. I'd never heard such skewed logic, "Why is this hypothetical person looking at my butt to begin with?"

Alice chuckled evilly, "Like you don't know you're a fine piece of man-candy, Edward."

There's something extremely disturbing when your little sister refers to you as 'man-candy' and so with that particular disconcerting comment out of the way, I shooed her out of the room so I could change. I threw the matching boxers back into my closet just to spite her.

I met her on the front porch at a quarter to seven. She was dressed in a short red dress that I would have had objections to, but I reminded myself that she was twenty-one and therefore not really my kid sister anymore.

I offered her my arm and walked us to my Volvo. She got in and went over the proceedings of the evening while I drove into town.

"Ok, the codeword for you to spill your Coke on me is 'hopscotch'."

I smirked, "What if Jasper wants to talk about favourite childhood games and hopscotch comes up?"

She turned and slapped my shoulder as hard as she would dare while I was driving, "Ok, fine. I'll listen for the word 'hopscotch'."

"Thank you, Big Brother. So if all goes well, I'll get Jasper to give me a ride home—I'll tell him that my car's in the shop and that I got a ride to the restaurant with a friend. I'll stall long enough so that you can get home well before us."

I sighed and shook my head. My sister had date-ditching/enjoying down to a science.

We arrived at the Chinese place and had the hostess seat us at separate booths; she looked at us strangely but said nothing. I pulled my menu up and stared over the edge of it at the rest of the people in the restaurant. It really wasn't very crowded, but it was still early in the night. A tall blonde man walked through the door, holding a single red rose: the signal for Alice's blind date. Objectively, I could tell he was handsome, but I would never say that out loud. Calling another dude handsome was a big no-no unless I wanted to hear Alice's lecture about 'coming out of the closet' and 'it's ok to be yourself'.

Alice stood to greet him and then shot me a surreptitious thumbs-up behind his back. I guess she was attracted to him; maybe I wouldn't have to spill my drink on her after all.

I stared at everyone else in the room, making up stories about the people there. There was another couple sitting side-by-side in one of the booths, doing things that really weren't appropriate for the public eye, there was a family with two small children who were sticking their chopsticks up their noses and then what appeared to be a father-daughter duo celebrating a birthday if the gift-wrap littering one side of the table was any indication to the festivities.

The night was long and after a while I found I'd eaten about eight of those little, sweet dough-balls covered in sugar that are hidden towards the end of the buffet line. Alice sent me a text message saying that she was going over to Jasper's apartment so that he could 'show her his Civil War antique collection'. I wondered what kind of strange euphemism that was.

I shook my head and texted her back saying to have a good time and be responsible. I could practically hear her rolling her eyes on the other side of the partitioning adjoining our booths. She got up to leave, Jasper's arm looped loosely around her waist.

I sighed and dug around my pockets for my iPod touch.

I updated my Facebook status and checked my email. I had a couple from the college and then one from an ex-girlfriend who couldn't take 'no' for an answer.

I quickly typed an email that pleasantly turned her down for about the thirtieth time she'd propositioned me. I reread the words, and pinched the bridge of my nose. I hit 'delete'.

I typed another reply, this time being more forceful.

'Tanya, stop emailing me. I do not have any desire currently, nor will I in the future, to be with you in any way shape or form. Please stop contacting me. I'll get a restraining order the next time you do.'

I hit SEND before I could chicken out and not send the email. I prayed that she would be too catty about my threat.

I went back to the buffet, dodging a petite, pretty brunette loading her plate high with noodles as I loaded mine with more sugary dough-balls.

I went back to my booth, eating my dessert food until my stomach started the churn and burn. It was well worth it.

I stared at the more-crowded restaurant as I pocketed my iPod I was just about to leave when I took notice of the father-daughter birthday crew arguing. I felt bad for them, nothing worse than getting into a tiff on a nice family dinner.

I sighed as the father left the girl in tears. Someone should give that girl a tissue, I thought to myself, stalking back to the buffet for a fortune cookie.

I stared at the girl askance, watching as she read through an old book and then threw it on the table. She got up to leave, still crying.

I glanced around the restaurant before I stalked over to the abandoned table. The book was still there, some of the pages bent after the girl had thrown it. It was an old copy of Wuthering Heights.

I read the note on the inside cover, 'Happy 21 Birthday, Bella. Love, Dad.' Some happy birthday for Bella, I snorted. I put the book into the stomach pocket of my hooded sweatshirt and paid for my dinner at the front counter.

I popped my fortune cookie out of the wrapper when I got into my Volvo, and ate the cookie before I read the fortune.

'**The one you love is closer than you think**'. It said, I groaned and rolled my eyes. I closed the fortune into the book and threw it onto the passenger seat of my car, and sped off home.

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**I was seriously surprised by the reaction to the first chapter!! I got more than 10 reviews. And thankfully I'm able to post while I'm here at the beach. My family has rented this awesome beach house and we've got wireless Internet, so I can update! Hooray! And now, I can introduce Edward!! This story is going to alternate POVs between Bella and Edward, so the next chapter will be Bella, the one after that Edward, Bella, Edward...you get the point.**

**Oh! This is completely random, but Alice's need for Edward's boxers to match his outfit stems from several conversations that me and a couple friends of mine had back in school. We used to sit behind a young man who didn't know what a belt was. And let's just say that we had several conversations about how we thought that if we had to see certain parts of his clothing that we thought they should at least match...**

**I need to thank my sister for helping me do research on this chapter. She researched up intestinal parasites for me. You're awesome, Sista.**

**What's your favourite thing to eat at a Chinese Buffet? Mine's beef lo mein.**


	3. Allies Against the Madness

**Chapter 3: Allies Against the Madness**

"_May we be fearless... from friends and enemies...from known and unknown ... from night and day...May all the directions be our allies."  
__-Atharva Veda_

It was Monday morning, and I hadn't spoken to my father since my failed birthday dinner the night before. I was not looking forward to the 'family dinner' that evening. I would rather shoot myself in the foot and then pour lemon juice on the wound then have to go to a family dinner with people that weren't even remotely my family.

Charlie left me a note beside the plate of pancakes he fixed for me before left for work.

'Sorry about last night' it said in his awkward scrawling chicken-scratch. I put it on a napkin before drenching the Stick-It note in maple syrup and watching the ink run. I threw it away with my untouched pancakes.

I took the stairs two-at-a-time as I went up to my bedroom and had a good cry-fest, my face buried in my pillow. I debated getting up to do something, clean the house maybe. Or trash the house so that Charlie would be embarrassed when his company came over. I thought better of it, though. Upset as I was, slob I was not.

Charlie called a little past lunch time to see if I was awake. I held the receiver to my ear but said nothing—I didn't know how long I would give him the silent treatment, but he wasn't getting out so easily. I was still betrayed by him. I was happy he'd found someone to cure his loneliness, but I was upset that he didn't trust me enough to tell me.

That line of thought started another round of tears and I ran back up to my room. This time I pulled a jacket on and grabbed my Converse and the keys to my truck. Charlie's guests were arriving around three, or so he said, and it was two-ish, so I really shouldn't have left the house but I needed to. It was stifling and I couldn't breath. I had to get out.

I made it to my truck and then started driving. I made my way over to Chinese restaurant to see if I could get my copy of Wuthering Heights. I felt kind of bad about leaving it there; hopefully no one had stolen it.

I asked the hostess if anyone had turned my book in at the front counter but she just shook her head, sending tendrils of straight dark hair fanning out around her round face. I sighed and dropped my head. The only good gift I'd ever gotten and I had to have a temper tantrum and lose it.

I could feel hot tears stinging my eyes again. I left the restaurant and went to sit in my truck and cry until I had no tears left.

My face felt hot, like the skin was stretched too tight over the bones. I just wanted to get out, forget who I was; adopt a new identity. Forget Isabella Swan, I needed to be someone new. Someone who didn't hurt inside because loneliness was a bitter disease, someone who could be brave and strong and beautiful.

There was a rough tap on my window and I jerked away from the steering wheel where I was resting my head.

A tall burly man stood at my window, a boyishly concerned look on his face. I stared at him open-mouthed for several moments before I leaned down to grab the lever to roll down the window. I got it down half-way before I asked, "Can I help you?"

He chuckled, "I was actually going to ask you that. It's not everyday you see a girl crying in her truck in the parking lot of a Chinese restaurant."

"I'm fine," I lied.

He raised one eyebrow and grinned, dimples indenting his cheeks, "You sure? My girl and I were about to go in for dinner; but if there's anything you need we wouldn't mind staying to help."

He gestured to a tall blonde that stood behind him. She was gorgeous and I suddenly felt self-conscious of my blotchy cheeks and swollen eyes.

"I'm fine, I just have had a really crappy couple of days, I guess I let my emotions get the better of me," I said forcing a smile. The man didn't look too convinced but let it go. He patted the side of my truck as I pulled out.

When I arrived back at the house I shared with my father another car had parked in my usual spot. I sat, my car idling at the mouth of the driveway as my stomach tied itself into intricate knots. I could see people moving around my kitchen, people I had seen before but never knew their names.

It looked like a different house, a different family. And I suddenly had this feeling in the pit of my stomach that I didn't belong there with them, in that brightly lit kitchen. I wasn't part of their happy family. I didn't have a family anymore and it hurt to think about.

The front door suddenly opened and a tall boy ran out and waved like he was trying to land a plane. He was dark-skinned with a thatch of unruly dark brown hair and a smile that made his face shine.

I pulled in and parked awkwardly, and opened the door of my truck. The boy ran forward and looked like he wanted to embrace me. Graciously, he didn't. He offered me his big, warm hand and introduced himself, "I'm Seth. My mom's Sue."

"I'm Bella, my mom's not Sue," I said, and then winced. It sounded so immature to spit out such an acidic phrase.

He grinned at me though and rubbed the back of his neck, "Yeah, this is a little weird isn't it?"

"Weird, no. Upsetting, yes," I said, slamming my truck door shut. There was a rather humorless laugh from the front porch and my eyes snapped up to see a girl, slightly taller than me, standing there. She had the same dark, shiny eyes as Seth but her face was more angular, darker somehow.

"I'm Leah, and I'm not too happy about this either," she said, not offering to shake my hand. She tucked a thick lock of her dark hair behind one double-pierced ear.

"Good to know I'm not the only one upset," I said darkly.

Leah snorted indignantly, "Mom thinks that we're all going to be one big happy family. She's crazy."

"Not crazy, just delusional," I offered leaning against the door to my truck.

Seth looked torn, he actually looked slightly happy about this whole arrangement, not that I could blame him he seemed like a typically happy boy, effervescent and outgoing. That type.

"You can go back inside, Seth," I suggested, trying to smile reassuringly at him.

"Don't be too mad at them, guys," he said, his eyes darting between me and his sister, "I know it's a lot to take in—but you can't blame them for keeping this from us."

"So your mom lied to you, too?" I asked petulantly.

"Yes," Leah replied crisply, stalking across the yard to lean against my truck next to me. Seth looked at the two of us with pleading eyes, he sighed and shrugged.

"I'm going to go back inside," he turned on his heel and marched up to the front door, he hesitated before he opened it he turned slightly to glance at me over his shoulder, "Happy late birthday, Bells."

My mouth dropped open and Leah laughed, "He likes to take people off guard. He knew you'd probably be upset about this whole arrangement so he's trying to be overly-nice to you."

I quickly rearranged my features, "How'd he know it was my birthday?"

She shrugged and dug around in her pockets for her compact, "He asked Charlie if there was anything he could do to get on your good side. Charlie didn't know but he did mention that you'd just had a birthday."

I nodded my head and pursed my lips. Despite being pissed off with my father I couldn't help but feel a little attached to Seth and Leah. They were in the same boat as me.

"We should probably go in," I sighed after about twenty minutes of sulking outside with Leah.

"Probably, my mom's most likely p.o.'ed with me," she sighed and flipped her long, dark hair over one shoulder.

I shrugged, I didn't really care if my father was angry with me, I was angry with him so then the feeling would be mutual.

Despite my protests to having Sue be a part of our 'family' I couldn't help but be thankful that she was a good cook. She made enchiladas for us with homemade tortillas and salsa. It was rather good. She and Charlie tried unsuccessfully to pull Leah and me into their conversation, but we both stubbornly refused.

Seth, however, was making an effort. I learned that he was a junior in high school and that he was captain of the varsity basketball team. He seemed like the sporty type.

I gathered from the conversation floating around us that Leah was a year older than me and was going to nursing school; she worked at the local hospital.

Charlie boasted about me a little and my schooling, to which I blushed profusely. He really was laying it on thick, and I could tell he was trying to suck up to me so maybe I would act more personable.

"So, Bella is there a special young man in your life?" Sue asked, turning to look at me with her earnest opaque eyes.

I choked on the bit of tortilla I was eating and I could feel my cheeks and neck catch fire. Seth snickered behind his hand and Charlie sent me a warning glare.

"No ma'am," I replied, sending a sneer in Charlie's direction for good measure. "I don't date."

"Oh," she said, "you're so lovely, I'm surprised by that."

My blush intensified as she continued, "Leah has several handsome young man friends from the hospital; perhaps you two could go on a double date."

Leah slammed her hand against the table and had a glaring match with her mother, "I don't think so Mother, you know I just got out of a long relationship I don't want to date and if Bella doesn't date we should force her into it."

"Oh well, Sam wasn't a nice young man anyway," Sue said offhandedly and I caught a fleeting glance of the hurt the flashes across Leah's espresso-coloured eyes. Seth dropped his fork against his plate loudly, causing us all to jump. He picked it up muttering and apology—he glanced at his sister and she mouthed 'thank you' back to him. He had purposefully taken the topic away from her and onto the 'clumsy children' stories.

Sue and Charlie pretty much ignored us for the rest of the evening; they kicked us out to the back deck when they washed dishes together. Leah took out her cell phone and began texting with a passion. I lay down in the hammock and pulled out my Blackberry. I updated Facebook—not that anyone ever commented on my status changes or anything else for that matter, my Wall was pathetically empty—and then I checked my email.

Seth sighed and started running laps of the yard; he was slightly winded when Sue called them in so they could go home. I surprised myself by hugging them both before they left.

Charlie beamed at me and I glared back, "Just because I happen to like them doesn't change the fact that you've lied to me, Charlie."

"I didn't lie," he wheedled, "I just didn't tell the truth."

I stomped my foot and crossed my arms over my chest, "It's still lying. Save your excuses."

"I really am sorry, Bella," he said, sounding tired and old.

"Sometimes sorry isn't enough, Dad."

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**Chapter tres. Don't be too upset with Bella for being melodramatic about Charlie's dating situation. She's justified!**

**I'm back from vacation now. [smiles] Had a good time at the beach, got a good tan; but didn't get much writing done. There was too much else going on! Anyways, I hope you guys enjoy this chapter.**

**Please REVIEW! I want to get at least 10 reviews per chapter...and that didn't happen last chapter. I'm sad. :(**

**If you could pick one Twilight character to be your sibling who would it be? I'd want Alice.**


	4. Stolen Book, Stolen Heart

**Chapter 4: Stolen Book, Stolen Heart**

"_I'm now quite cured of seeking pleasure in society, be it country or town. A sensible man ought to find sufficient company in himself."  
__-Emily Bronte_

I was on duty Monday morning, working as a fledgling doctor at Forks Hospital. My father had pulled some major strings to allow me to have my residency so close to home. I was working in the ER, thankful that it was a slow day. I sat behind the nurse's station, sipping a Coke from the vending machine down the hall and chatting up the nurse behind the desk.

"So Dr. Cullen how was your weekend?" Jessica, the hospital gossip, asked leaning over so that I could catch a glimpse of her cleavage through the open neck of her scrubs.

I sighed and looked away, "It was fine, Jessica."

"Just fine?" She asked, drawing one manicured fingernail down the length of my forearm.

I flinched away from her and nursed my Coke, "Yes. I stayed home and read; my sister dragged me out to dinner one night."

"Well maybe you'd like to go out to dinner with me sometime?" She suggested with a flirtatious wink. Call me old fashioned but I liked to be the one to ask a girl on a date, as a general rule I didn't agree to girls who asked me out—it made my ego deflate a little.

"I don't think so, Jessica. I'm too busy to date," I said. I stood up and crushed my soda can in my hand and tossed it into the waste basket under the edge of the desk.

"Call me sometime, Edward!" She called as I disappeared around the corner.

That woman could not take a hint! I thought to myself leaning against the wall and tipping my head back.

"Being McDreamy too hard on you, Dr. Cullen," one of the few nurses who didn't have a crush on me intoned, glancing up from her clipboard. She usually worked in the children's ward, a fact I knew because of her Finding Nemo scrubs.

"It's tough work being the sex symbol of the hospital, Leah," I quipped, grinning at her.

She rolled her eyes and stuck a pencil behind her ear.

"Anything fun planned for your night off?" I asked conversationally walking beside her through the halls; she glanced back over her shoulder at me, her eyebrows furrowed.

"Yeah, I get to meet my mom's new squeeze," she said sarcastically.

"Your mom has a boyfriend?" I asked; I'd met her mother once when her younger brother had pulled a hamstring playing basketball. Her father had passed away when she was a teenager, and her mother didn't strike me as the type to find another man.

"Yep," she said, her lips popping on the 'p'. She took her pencil out from behind her ear and made more notes on her clipboard after looking at the chart of one of the patients in the ward.

"You don't sound happy for her," I hedged, sticking my head in a room to check on a patient.

"I'm happy that she's found someone, but she just told Seth and me about it last night and apparently things are getting pretty serious between her and Chief Swan, so I'm a little peeved that she didn't bring it up before. I mean, how did she hide a relationship from us?!" Leah demanded, her voice rising in volume.

I shushed her as politely as I could, "Maybe she had her reasons?"

"I doubt it," Leah muttered darkly and stalked off towards the lady's room. I sighed and shook my head.

"Women," I scoffed to myself. You try to lend a friendly ear and they bite your head off.

The rest of the day was uneventful, I sat in the nurse's station for a couple of hours, playing minesweeper on the computer and drinking about four more Cokes. Jessica got off around lunchtime so I really only had to block her advances for another hour before the afternoon nurse came in.

She was an elderly woman who had known me and Alice since we were babies. She often liked to remind me of that fact by pinching my cheek and asking rather invasive questions about my personal life.

Around two Leah walked out of the ward. I waved cockily and she flipped me off as she walked by. I laughed loudly, shaking my head.

My cell phone rang and I answered it, "Hello, sister of mine."

"Hello, dear big brother," Alice answered, her voice a little muffled by the cell phone static.

"To what do I owe the pleasure of this call?" I asked, starting a new game of solitaire up on the computer.

"Mom wants to know if you'll be home for dinner," she said.

"Unless something crazy happens within the next hour, then yeah, I'll be home. Why?" I asked skeptically—Alice knew I'd be home for dinner…

"Because," she said drawing the word out. I sighed and pinched the bridge of my nose waiting for her to continue, "Jasper may be coming over to meet Mom and Dad."

"Didn't you just start dating him?" I asked.

"So what? Haven't you ever heard of love at first sight?" She asked, affronted.

I snorted, she knew I didn't believe in love at first sight—I didn't believe in love. Period. End of story. But Alice knew how to push my buttons.

"Love at first sight is over-commercialized," I retorted.

She groaned, "Just because you're a cynic doesn't mean that I don't believe in love. Now, please be nice to Jasper—I really like this guy!"

"When am I ever not nice to people?" I asked, narrowing my eyes.

"Just don't talk about anything gross or use crazy medical jargon," she said.

"Despite my not believing in love, I don't lack social skills. I know what's proper or improper for the dinner table, Ali," I deadpanned. I hated that she treated my like a child, like I was someone who needed to go take time-out in the corner.

She muttered something and then said a little louder, "Alright. Well, get home soon, Big Brother."

"Alright," I sighed and flipped my phone closed before sticking it into the pocket of my white lab coat.

Alice was always a little flighty; she always had her head in the clouds. She wanted a storybook life, she wanted a house in the 'burbs with a white picket fence and the archetypal 2.4 children with a husband who worked 9 to 5 and made a respectable amount of money.

Perhaps Jasper could give that to her, or maybe he'd break her heart. And I'd break his face.

I got home in time to shower the Lysol and bleach hospital smell out of my hair and dress in a clean pair of jeans and a button-down before Jasper knocked on the front door. My parents welcomed him in and seated him at the formal dining table before starting in on the Spanish Inquisition.

I stood in the doorway with my arms crossed over my chest, ready to pull out the menacing big brother act if need be. Jasper seemed like an ok guy; but I had yet to determine if he was good enough for my sister or not.

I cleared my throat and he jumped a little. I walked up to him and offered him my hand, "I'm Edward. Alice's brother."

"I'm Jasper," he replied shaking my hand. He had a firm handshake and a heavy Southern accent. It was a little strange.

"So, Jasper, what do you do for a living?" I asked.

"Well, I'm studying to be a psychiatrist, actually," he said, rubbing his sweaty hands against his pants.

I nodded, a doctor. That was good. Maybe Jasper would work out after all.

Dinner was a tense affair, to say the least. Jasper was sweating a little because of the intense scrutiny he was under. I'd imagine he was quite stressed out—my sister could be a little forceful at times, but he seemed determined to live through dinner as well as the coffee my mother served in the parlor afterwards.

I snuck out to my bedroom on the third floor before my father could begin to give Jasper and Alice his famous lecture on responsibility.

I sat on my sofa near my large window and pulled the abandoned copy of Wuthering Heights out from under one of the throw pillows.

Alice would have a fit if she knew I'd kept the book. I hadn't told her about taking it. I'd probably get a discourse about being responsible and taking the book back because Bella might have come looking for it.

But I was so intrigued by it. Intrigued by this Bella.

Who receives an old copy of Wuthering Heights for their twenty-first birthday? Most twenty-one year-olds haven't read the classics or even liked them if they had.

I remembered the high-school reading lists I'd had; it was like pulling teeth to get my classmates to read things for English class. But, this Bella person seemed to either be a collector of cool old books, or a fan of Emily Bronte.

I'd have to ask Alice about the book, but make up some story about it so Alice wouldn't know I was secretly intrigued by Bella and her book.

I knew she would know something about it, she worked downtown at a big antique shop so she was usually well versed in every old china patterns, furniture selection and most of all books.

I sighed and tossed the book to the other end of the couch.

I picked up the remote for my stereo and turned it on so that Beethoven was playing softly in the background.

I closed my eyes and tried to picture Bella, but all I saw was my own modern interpretation of Cathy Earnshaw, a woman with a bit of a bite. But who was I to make judgments on someone I didn't even know?

All I did know; however, was that I needed to find this Bella person. I needed to know more about her than that she received strange presents for landmark birthdays and that she was far more captivating than any other girl I'd ever met before.

And I hadn't even met her. Yet.

* * *

**I liked writing Edward as the intimidating big brother. [laughs] It was fun. **

**I know that it doesn't feel like this story is moving along very fast, but it is. I promise. This story is probably going to end up being really long. I've written through the 15 chapter, and I'm still not even to the really good part of the plot yet. So for those of you wondering if this story is going anywhere, it is. Believe me. A lot more drama comes into play. If you've read my other stories, you'll find that this story leans more towards TGBM than 7B47B. It's going to be a long time coming to the romance. Deal with it. This is going to be as accurate a portrayal of a real romance that I can give. None of that crap where Edward and Bella introduce themselves and suddenly they're rolling around in bed, not a stitch on 'em. So yeah. They'll have their problems in this story, because let's face it they're both a little screwed up and then...well, I guess you'll just have to wait and see what happens. ;) **

**Wow, sorry that was a totally long rant. **

**Oh! I'm changing the updating schedule for this. Fridays and Mondays. I'm starting to hate the every five day thing. It's annoying to keep track of. So next chapter will be up on Monday.**

**Question of the day: What's your favourite work of classic literature? I'm torn between Wuthering Heights and To Kill a Mockingbird. **


	5. One of the Deadly Sins

**Chapter 5: One of the Deadly Sins**

"_Why love if losing hurts so much? We love to know that we are not alone."  
__-C.S. Lewis_

Friday morning came and Sue and her family were coming over so that 'us kids' could spend the day together. We were going to the park so we could have a picnic and Seth could play some basketball and Leah and I could get to know each other better. The park also had the added benefit of being the romantic spot of choice for Charlie and Sue. Supposedly that was where they met.

They walked through the trees, looking at the turning colours, hand-in-hand. Leah mimed throwing up behind their backs and Seth and I giggled perversely.

I hadn't spoken to Charlie since Monday night and the absence of companionship had left me longing for someone to talk to, so I instantly latched onto Seth and Leah. It felt strange to talk to people around my own age. I'd never really spoken to any of my classmates at college, none of them had really grown-up any and I really didn't want to waste my time on immature jerks.

Seth found an old basketball hoop with a rusted chain net and he pulled his ball out of the trunk of his mother's car. He started doing lay-ups and warm-up drills.

"Coach says that I'll be starting point guard this year," he told his sister and me proudly, practicing his three-pointers.

"I never went to basketball games in high school," I observed, watching in awe as he dunked the ball.

"You'll have to come to one of my games, Bells!" Seth said excitedly, "It's really fun."

"He's lying, it's a lot of obnoxious people yelling weird stuff like 'Get down the court!' or 'Good D! Good D!' or, my personal favourite, 'C'mon my grandma could've made a better shot than that'," Leah said, French-braiding her own hair.

"Shut-up, Leah," Seth said, sounding younger than he was.

I decided not to get in the middle of the sibling argument, and so I amused myself by plucking at pieces of grass under the blanket Leah and I were sharing. I grabbed a long piece and held it between my thumbs and blew onto it. It made a loud, keening noise that made Seth miss his shot and Leah jump.

"That's so cool!" Seth exclaimed, his practice forgotten, "How'd you do that?"

"If you get a long enough piece of grass and press it between your thumbs, you can make a whistle," I said, demonstrating for him.

"It sounds like a dying goose," Leah snorted, falling back against the blanket and staring up at the sky.

Seth flopped down next to her and laid his head across her legs, "Look! That cloud looks like a pirate ship!"

"Aren't you a little old to be finding shapes in clouds?" Leah scoffed.

Seth rolled his eyes, "You're too uptight, Leah. Take a chill pill."

"Shut up," she said, pushing his head off her leg so that she could stand up.

I sighed as I watched her walk away, flipping her cell phone out as she went.

I rolled over onto my stomach and stared at the wet grass all around me.

Seth's voice startled me when he broke the silence moments later, "She was dating this guy for a couple of years and he just broke it off with her three months ago—she still cries herself to sleep sometimes."

"I don't know if you should've told me that, Seth," I said uneasily, staring at Leah's back as she leaned against a tree about thirty feet away from us.

"She won't mind, she told me she wanted to tell you herself; but she says sometimes it hurts too much to talk about Sam."

"Your mom mentioned him at dinner the other night," I intoned, resting my head against my forearms so that I could stare at Seth.

He rested on his back, still gazing up at the sky. His hands were folded neatly across his stomach, "Mom didn't like Sam too much. I thought he was a pretty cool guy; but he's kind of got a temper. Mom was always afraid he'd turn abusive once Leah married him. We found out a while ago that he 'doesn't love her anymore and wants to be with someone else'." He formed air quotes around the last words, he let his hands drop back down to his abdomen.

"It was really dumb, and it hurt my sister a lot. She was just getting back to herself when Mom told us about how she's been dating your dad. Leah's jealous of her," he said matter-of-factly.

I turned my head sharply to the side so that I was staring into his honest, onyx eyes, "How do you feel about our parents dating each other?"

"It's weird, ya know? I mean, it's kinda creepy to think my mom's going out on dates and has a boyfriend and all…but I'm happy for her. Charlie seems like a pretty cool guy. It kind of makes me sad because I don't really remember Dad all that well."

"I haven't even met my mom, if that makes you feel any better," I offered.

His eyes actually looked sad and he opened his mouth to respond.

"I don't need your pity, Seth," I said, holding my hand up to silence him.

"It must suck; I know it's hard to only have one parent. At least I got to know Dad a little. He taught me how to play basketball, you know."

"The only thing my mother taught me is that love is fleeting and is a bond that can easily be broken. They say the love between a mother and a child is the strongest kind of love, but I think it's a lie. Love doesn't really exist."

"I disagree. 'The greatest of these is love', right? At least that's what it says in the Bible," Seth told me with a grin.

I snorted and buried my face into my arms, "Love doesn't exist. It's over-commercialized."

Seth shook his head, "Don't be so cynical. One day you're going to fall in love and then you'll eat your words."

"I doubt it," I mumbled.

Seth just shook his head, an infuriating smirk on his face.

"What do you want from life, Bella?" He asked after another moment of companionable silence.

"I want to live and die unremarkably. I don't want to be noticed, I don't want a big deal made out of me, and when I eventually leave this world I hope that it's with the least amount of pomp as possible."

"Then why do you keep waking up in the morning? Your life doesn't sound worth living," Seth said, his nostrils flaring angrily.

"Seth, I live inside this shell of a person that I barely know. It's a pitiable existence at best. At worst, I don't know what it is."

"You're wrong, Bella. You don't see yourself very clearly." He said earnestly.

"I see myself clearly enough," I said haughtily.

"No you don't," he said and sat up, "you're only seeing one side of you. You're seeing the parts you want to see. Everyone has a bad side, everyone has a side of them they hate—you're just dwelling on yours."

"I'm not dwelling on anything," I said sulkily.

He retrieved his basketball from the perimeter of the court, "Yes you are. You know what your problem is, Bella? You're pessimistic."

"Oh yes, the glass is half empty," I said, pushing myself up on my elbows so I could watch him.

"The glass may be half empty," he said with a shrug, "but that's just what you make of it."

"You should be a psychiatrist," I told him quite seriously. He laughed.

"I should be a lot of things, but I'm not. For right now I'm content to be who I am. I am a junior in high school who really only cares about making mediocre grades and playing ball. It's no use worrying about things in the future that I have no control over."

I felt like my heart was contracting inside of me to the rhythm of Seth dribbling the ball. Why was he so…right?

"It's creepy how astute he is," Leah said, stalking back over to the blanket spread across the dewy grass.

"Yeah, it is," I said distractedly.

"When he was born my dad said that he was going to be very wise," she said quietly, a far-away look in her dark brown eyes.

"Your father was right," I said truthfully. Seth was very wise.

She nodded, "Tell mom that I just got a call to come in to the hospital, one of our nurses had a death in the family so they're short-handed so I need to go fill in."

I nodded, "Do you need a ride?" I'd once again driven myself to that particular outing, just incase I needed to escape.

"Yeah, thanks," she said. She cupped her hands around her lips and called to Seth. She explained the situation to him and he nodded, but his eyes darkened when he accused the two of us of ditching. Which we kind of were, but he didn't have to act like it was one of the end of the world.

Leah and I happily skipped away from the park and hopped into my truck. I knew the route to the hospital well because of my many emergency room escapades.

We rolled the windows down so that the crisp autumn air could float into the cab of the truck. We didn't talk, we barely acknowledged each other but that was fine with me.

Leah wound her braid into a tight bun at the nape of her neck with one of the elastics I kept in the glove box and then she took out her cell phone and made a quick call to the nurse's station to arrange for a pair of extra scrubs to be left at the front desk.

I pulled up to the curb by the automatic doors and put my truck into park so she could jump out.

She smiled for me, "Thanks for the ride, Bella!"

"No problem," I said, resting my hand against the gearshift.

"Hey, if you go back to the park, keep an eye on Seth for me, ok? He's got a bad leg and I don't want his basketball season to end before it begins," she said, her concern shining over the dark expanse of her eyes.

I smiled, "Sure. I'll sit on him if he starts doing anything too strenuous."

Leah giggled and rolled her eyes. She shut my door and walked up to the doors of the hospital.

I waved, but my hand froze mid-air. Just outside the doors, talking to Leah was a man in pale green scrubs with a white lab coat slung carelessly over one shoulder. A pair of reading glasses were shoved into his mop of unruly red hair.

He glanced up at me and grinned. I shoved my truck into gear and stepped on the gas pedal. My heart was hammering inside my chest; I clamped my lips shut so that it wouldn't jump out of my throat.

I didn't believe in love at first sight. I couldn't. To me love at first sight was like one of the Seven Deadly Sins.

But, then if I didn't believe, how could I explain what had happened inside of me when I looked into that man's exotic green eyes?

* * *

**Ah, love at first sight--if only it could be that easy. ;) But I guess you guys will just hae to wait and see. I've written through chapter 18 of this story and I'm working on getting to one of the main conflicts of the story. I figure this story will be around 25-30 chapters. **

**Here's the question for today, it's rather simple: Do you believe in love at first sight? I'm not entirely sure if I do or not. I'd like to think it exists.**


	6. Finding the Owner

**Chapter 6: Finding the Owner**

"_We allow our ignorance to prevail upon us and make us think we can survive alone, alone in patches, alone in groups, alone in races, even alone in genders."  
__-Maya Angelou_

"Who was that?" I asked Leah as she watched the rusted, monstrous red truck pull out of the hospital's parking lot.

She shrugged a little and brushed past me and activated the automatic doors, "She's Charlie Swan's daughter."

"Your mom's boyfriend's daughter?" I asked, hoping I'd got the relation correct.

She grimaced when I said 'boyfriend' but nodded nonetheless.

"Yeah, we're in an accord," Leah said with a devilish grin.

"And what would that be?" I asked, despite not really wanting to know the answer.

"Neither of us is too happy about the current arrangement between our parents, so we've formed a bit of an alliance," she said, gathering her scrubs from the nurse's station and stalking towards the washroom to change.

I rolled my eyes, and plopped down at the front desk. Jessica, who was supposed to be on duty that afternoon, had to fly to Milwaukee because her grandfather had passed away so it was Leah and I stuck at the nurse's station in the ER, counting down the minutes until our shift ended.

"So what's your partner in crime's name?" I asked after she had beaten me eight consecutive times at rummy.

"What?" She asked, shuffling the cards with the precision of a Vegas dealer.

"You know, Chief Swan's daughter, what's her name?" I asked, opening a bag of Doritos I'd gotten from the vending machines.

"Why do you care?" She asked, dealing the cards once more. "Oh my God! McDreamy has a crush on my almost-step-sister!"

"I do not have a crush on her," I said, picking up my cards and spreading them out in front of my face. Two jacks, a two, a queen, an ace, a seven and a nine—none of them in matching suits. I cursed softly to which Leah smirked somewhat infuriatingly.

She picked at her cards a little before picking up the nine of hearts that lay face-up and discarding a measly two.

I picked up a card from the deck and discarded at random—I was long past wanting to beat her. It was impossible, she had to be cheating.

"So what's her name?" I prodded, eating a couple more chips and making another crappy move in the card game.

"Bella," Leah said, sorting through her hand with precision.

I almost choked on my Coke. I coughed a little and could feel the fizz bubbling up to burn my nose. Leah leaned over and patted me hard on the back. "Do I need to perform the Heimlich maneuver?"

I shook my head no and turned to cough into my shoulder.

"You're redder than a tomato," Leah remarked, laying down a full house.

I tossed my cards onto the table between us, and tried to pretend that my mind wasn't reeling.

Bella. Brown-haired, wide-eyed Bella, could she be…?

"So what do you know about her?" I asked, mildly sipping my Coke so I didn't choke again.

"Oh yeah, real smooth Edward," Leah said as she rolled her eyes, she shuffled the deck again and started setting up cards for a game of solitaire. "I can really tell that you're not at all interested in her."

"I was just curious," I said, hoping she believed me, "and besides I'm bored. Entertain me."

Leah chuckled softly, "I don't know that much about her, it's not like we've been gossiping in the wee hours of the morning as we braid each other's hair and paint each other's toenails."

"How old is she?" I asked, turning to the desk computer and pulling up a game of Internet chess, deciding to ignore Leah's previous comment about girly bonding.

"Twenty-something," Leah said, gathering all of the cards up and putting them back in their weathered little box. She tossed them under the desk and pulled out her cell phone. "She had a birthday last weekend."

My heart stopped, then. And it was a struggle to keep the elation, the shock, the overall surge of emotions from my face. I was used to playing poker with my best friend from high school, and he said he could always tell when I was lying. I just hoped Leah wasn't that observant.

"Is she in college?" I asked.

"Yeah, she's studying British literature or something crazy like that," Leah said, paying more attention to setting her ringtones than talking to me—for which I was thankful.

This new tidbit of information both fascinated and frightened me. The Bella that I had been so enamored with was closer than I thought. I could talk to her if I wanted. I could return her book.

I began to form a loose plan, some way to return her book and perhaps get a little more information on her at the same time. Because, if I was going to be honest with myself, I had a little bit of a crush on the idea of Bella.

I managed to get through the rest of the evening without tipping Leah off that I had a strange, almost creepy, fixation on her mother's boyfriend's daughter.

My cell phone rang and I pressed it to my ear as I was walking out the automatic doors of the ER. Leah was waiting for her ride to show up and I waved as I trotted over to my Volvo.

"Hello?" I asked, wiping my face with the palm of my hand.

"Hey, Edward, you want to come down to house and shoot some hoops with me?" One of my only friends asked. I sighed; I really didn't want to let him down. I'd bailed on him enough in the last few months.

"I'm really tired, man," I said throwing my lab coat onto the passenger seat of the Volvo and starting the engine. It came to life with a low purr that always made me grin.

"Rosie made her famous mac and cheese, c'mon Edward, you can't stay locked up in your room playing classical music and reading medical text books forever."

I sighed and beat my head against the steering wheel, "Emmett I have been working; Carlisle pulled a lot of strings to let me do this internship here at home. I can't let him down."

"So you're just closing yourself off from the outside world for no other reason than pleasing Carlisle?" Emmett prodded.

"Emmett, I'm going to hang up now—don't take it personally." I said as I twisted my wrist to snap my phone closed.

I knew that Emmett wouldn't be offended by my hanging up on him; I'd done it a bunch of times before, and he always called back. Sometimes I would let it ring through to voicemail and after leaving a message punctuated by swear words and crude jokes—he'd call back again, repeating the pattern until I eventually picked up the phone.

Sure enough as I was pulling through the intersection across from the parking lot of the hospital, my phone vibrated in the cup holder I had tossed it in after I hung up.

I picked it up, flipped it open and pressed it to my ear.

"Hey man, you actually picked up this time!" Emmett boomed, ending his sentence with a youthful laugh.

"I didn't feel like deleting all the messages you would have left me later," I said, passing a couple cars who thought it was ok to drive 50 when it was a 55 mile zone.

"So, seriously," he said his voice sobered from his earlier teasing, "Rose really wants you to come over. The McCarty family misses you, man."

"I know," I sighed, screeching to a halt at a stop sign.

"Then why are you avoiding us?" He asked.

"I'm not avoiding you per se, I'm just not around as much as I used to," I mumbled. "I've been really busy at the hospital and when I'm not there I just want to go home and sleep."

Emmett sighed, the sound vibrating weirdly through the static of the phone, "Just don't go all depressed on us again, ok?"

I didn't reply to him, I didn't really need to. It was none of his business what I did with my life, or if I decided to be antisocial for any length of time. Emmett didn't need me anymore; he'd grown up a lot in the last couple of years. He had Rosalie now, and they were starting their life together.

"Emmett," I sighed, flipping on my turn signal as pulled into our driveway.

"Edward," he retorted. "I just don't want to see you sad again, you're my friend Edward; I care about you."

"I know, Em. But I'm a big boy I can take care of myself," I said, putting my car into park and getting out.

Emmett said something that I didn't quite catch, before he said a little louder, "At least think about coming to dinner this Sunday? We're having a cookout."

"I'll think about it, Emmett," I said, unlocking the front door and kicking my shoes off. "I'll talk to you later."

"Yeah, later," he muttered. I sighed and closed my phone, staring at it for a while before I bounded up the stairs and into my bedroom.

I wasn't necessarily avoiding Emmett because I was going to slither back into my shell and not talk to anyone, it was more the way he was now. It made me a little sick to my stomach, he was so exuberant…so in love with Rosalie that it made me hurt to watch.

I made my way to my room, turning my stereo on and shedding my clothes as I went. I turned the shower on scalding hot and stepped in. It hurt, but not terribly so. It felt good to my aching, tired muscles.

I dressed in a pair of sweatpants and an old T-shirt. I locked my door so Alice wouldn't come in after she got back from classes and I sprawled out across my couch. I was half way through re-reading Wuthering Heights.

I'd still kept it a secret from Alice, but I didn't need her help locating its owner anymore.

I wanted to get the book back to Bella Swan, but I was terribly intrigued by her.

I grabbed a pen from a cup on my desk and opened the front cover.

'Happy 21 Birthday, Bella. Love, Dad.'

I jerked the cap off my pen with my teeth and then poised my hand over the page. I wanted to write something, tell Bella something but I couldn't think of words.

I finally closed my eyes and let my hand move of its own accord. I reread the words when I was satisfied that I'd said all I wanted—needed—to say. I nodded and closed the book, tossing it onto the other end of my couch.

I closed my eyes exhausted, and let sleep overtake me.

* * *

**What do you think Edward wrote? I'm not going to answer because I _know _what Edward wrote. ;)**


	7. Return to Sender

**Chapter 7: Return to Sender**

"_To be in love is merely to be in a state of perceptual anesthesia -- to mistake an ordinary young man for a Greek god or an ordinary young woman for a goddess."  
__-H.L. Mencken_

I woke up Saturday morning at an ungodly hour. No one in their right mind should be awake at 6:30 in the morning on a Saturday. But there I was, staring at my ceiling with a sort of oppressive feeling growing and swelling in my chest.

I rolled over and stared at the red numbers on the face of my clock.

Annoyed, I kicked my blankets and sheet off, and fisted my hands in the fabric of my holey sweatpants.

I tossed my hair into a low ponytail and went down the stairs. I found myself staring into the open fridge, my stomach growling. Nothing in the fridge looked appealing, everything either sounded like it was too much work or not filling enough. Disgusted with myself, and with the poor food selection, I slammed the door shut. I could hear glass bottles of Tabasco sauce and mayonnaise clink together with the force.

I grabbed a bowl from one of the cupboards and poured a handful of Cheerios into it; I ate them dry with a glass of ginger ale. I watched the sun come up and peer into the kitchen window through the gauzy, white curtains.

Charlie came down the stairs to find me sitting at the table, reading my old copy of Wuthering Heights.

"I thought I got you a new one for your birthday," he said gruffly. He passed by me and stalked to the fridge; he pulled out the carton of orange juice and unscrewed the cap. He grabbed a glass from the dish rack and poured himself a drink.

I narrowed my eyes at him. Charlie never, ever used a glass when drinking orange juice, he drank it straight out of the carton because I don't like it… Sue must have caught him drinking it straight out of the container and reprimanded him. I smirked.

He caught it and glared, "It was a nasty habit to have anyway."

I raised an eyebrow and went back to reading my book. I was to the part where Cathy was telling Nelly that her soul was made of the same thing as Heathcliff's. I didn't find it fair that as awful as Cathy was she still could find love. Maybe I could become horrible and catty and boys would start throwing themselves in my path, so many boys that I'd have to beat them off with a stick.

"I'm off to go fishing with Billy today," Charlie said, pulling his fishing gear out of the hall closet and brandishing it for me to see. I looked over the edge of my book and stared at him.

I nodded but didn't speak, keeping up my vow of silence whenever I was around him. He grunted at me when I didn't respond and he just stalked out the door.

Good, I'd ruined his otherwise pleasant morning. Serves him right.

I pushed my chair backwards and tossed my book onto the table. I cleared my plate and glass and cleaned them up before heading upstairs to shower.

I turned it on as hot as I dared and stepped it. It scalded my toes before I leaned the rest of my body into the spray. My muscles were aching and tired, and I was sore for no apparent reason.

I beat my head against the tile wall and fished around blindly for the soap. I washed and rinsed quickly, my hot water was slowly turning cold. Nothing worse than starting off with a sweltering hot shower that melts you and then being frozen to death so you tense and get all worked up again.

I stepped out and dried off; I wrapped a towel around myself and then put my hair up in a turban. I stalked to my room, my feet leaving wet prints on the carpet of the hallway.

I dressed in a casual pair of jeans and a camisole. I tossed an oversized hoodie over the ensemble for good measure. My hair was still wet, the short hairs on the back of my neck were curling every so slightly. I combed it out with my fingers and threw it into a high bun.

I went downstairs and relaxed on the couch watching a rerun of The Munsters on TV Land. I turned the volume down when I heard the sound of crunching gravel in the driveway and then a car door slamming closed.

I muted the TV when someone knocked on the front door.

Charlie hadn't said he was expecting anyone, and I doubted Sue or any of her family would come over when Charlie wasn't there. I tip-toed over to the curtains and pulled them aside to stare into the driveway.

I didn't recognize the car; it definitely wasn't Sue's little, gold Honda Accord. It was a shiny, silver Volvo. No one I knew had a nice car like that. I craned my neck to see if I could tell who was at the front door.

I could tell it was a guy—or a really butch woman—but other than that I couldn't tell because of the angle of the window.

I quickly ran towards the front door, tripping and falling against the wall on the way, I opened it a couple of inches and peeked out.

The man standing on the porch made my heart do a strange little back flip and then drop straight down to my toes. It was the handsome doctor that was in front of the hospital when I dropped Leah off.

Up close his eyes looked even more magical, like trees after a thunderstorm and the air is still thick. His hair was red and deliciously messy, like he had untamable bed-head.

"Hi," he said, smiling and showing off a set of perfectly white, straight teeth. Self-consciously I ran my tongue around my teeth, they'd been encased in braces for three, tortuous years of my life and I couldn't help but think that this handsome man probably got his pearly-whites sans metal and pain and embarrassment.

"Can I help you?" I asked, still hiding behind the door.

"Yeah," he said with a chuckle, "Are you Bella Swan?"

Oh my God. How did he know my name? Why did he know my name? I stood, my mouth open like a dying fish, staring into his disconcerting eyes.

"You are Bella Swan, aren't you?" He asked his perfect brow furrowing.

I shook my head, it felt all dusty and muddled, and managed to mumble, "Yes."

"I'm Edward Masen-Cullen," he said, "may I come in? It looks like it's going to start raining any moment now."

"Um," I mumbled, staring up at the sky and noticing the ominous dark cumuli overhead, I opened the door wider and ushered him in. "Do I know you?"

"Not really," he said, sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck. Could he possibly look any more adorable?

I gave him a questioning look and he amended, "Leah told me about you. We worked the ER shift yesterday afternoon."

I nodded my head. "Leah doesn't live here, if you're looking for her."

"Oh no, I'm not looking for her!" He said a little too quickly.

"Then what do you need?" I asked, leaning against the wall.

"Nothing, Leah told me this is where you lived and I needed to come and find you," he said, looking anywhere but my face.

"What are you talking about?" I asked, my cheeks heating up.

"I wanted…I mean, I just have something for you," he said a little nervously. "Sorry for the intrusion."

He pulled something out of the pocket of his hoodie and put it into my hands. He stared into my eyes for a couple of seconds and then he turned on his heel and let himself out.

I stared at the front door for a couple of seconds before looking down at what he put into my hands.

It was the copy of Wuthering Heights Charlie had bought me for my birthday last Sunday. I felt hot tears prick my eyes. I clutched the book to my chest and wondered how Edward had gotten it. I wished I could ask him. But it wasn't like we were close or even knew each other.

I started to cry; just a rush of emotions pounding against me likes waves lapping at the beach. I made my way to the couch and sat down, hard.

I balanced the book on my knees and pried the cover open.

Under the note my father left, there was a new one. The handwriting was strong, all caps and looked like it was written with a calligraphy pen.

**Bella, happy belated birthday. I'm sorry that your special day didn't end well. I'm equally as sorry that it took me so long to return your book, truth be told I had no idea who you were until I saw you at the hospital. I hope you can forgive me for stealing this book for a week. **

**I wish you the best, Bella; I hope that despite having a rough start to a new year this year will bring you everything you want in life. My greatest hope for you is that you find happiness and love unlike the characters in this book. You deserve the best life can offer you. **

**Yours truly,**

**Edward Masen-Cullen**

I pressed the book to my face, sobbing. How could he have the words that I couldn't find for myself? How could he know me so well? And then not really know me at all?

I reread the words enough times that I memorized them.

I could recite the passage Edward had written. It was enough to make my crush on him intensify tenfold.

Charlie came in with a cooler full of fish and the declaration that he'd be making fish fry for all of us—Sue and family included.

I didn't really care; I was flipping through my book with newfound hope.

I stood up to go change when a slip of paper fell out of my book. I bent down and gathered it into my hands. It was a little creased fortune from a fortune cookie. I was surprised to find it tucked within the tome.

I read the fortune with my heart pounding in my chest.

'The one you love is closer than you think.'

* * *

**Pam Briggs came closest to answering the question from last chapter correctly. And everyone was really mad that I'd just left it there and didn't say what he'd written. Sorry, guys, it got you hooked, though, didn't it?! **

**Oh, big THANK YOU to everyone who reviewed, I'm finally back up to as many reviews that I want for this story. 10 reviews on average per chapter. So I'm at 60+ reviews for 6 chapters! You guys rock my socks. Keep it up.**

**I go back to work this week, but hopefully I'll be able to get some writing done before school starts back up again at the end of this month... [sighs]**

**What's the best fortune you've ever gotten in a cookie? I can't recall mine, but it's always funny to put 'in the bathroom' at the end of every fortune. So the one in this story would be 'The one you love is cloer than you think...in the bathroom.' It's super-immature, but so hilarious.**


	8. The Heart of the Matter

**Chapter 8: The Heart of the Matter**

"_So where's the heart?  
__It's not coming through.  
Who is this for?  
So where's the heart?"  
__-"Just Another Marionette" by Emarosa_

I couldn't believe I'd just done that. I'd gone to Bella Swan's house with the intention of talking to her, getting to know her and then when she'd peered around the crack of the door with those imploring brown eyes I felt like a teenager again, fumbling my way through my first kiss.

I had just practically thrown the book at her. I was such an idiot. She probably thought I was mentally unstable.

I turned up the music extremely loud in my Volvo and rolled the windows down. I sped through the roads of Forks, blasting Emarosa and singing along like a madman.

I stopped only when my cell phone rang; I turned the volume down and pressed the phone against my ear.

"Hello?" My voice was raspy from singing along, and I hoped whoever had called me couldn't tell.

"Edward, where are you!" Alice practically yelled in my ear.

"I'm driving Alice. Geez, you need to stop yelling before I go deaf," I muttered.

"Where have you been Dad's going ballistic?!" She exclaimed, nearing a deafening volume once again.

I sighed, "What's the problem?"

"Dr. Valencia just got here and you're not here, you're off gallivanting doing God knows what!" She spat.

"Aro's not supposed to be here for another four hours," I sighed, resisting the urge to drive my car straight into one of the thick pines lining the road.

"Yeah, well that creepy freak's here right now so you better get your yams home!" Alice said in a hushed whisper, probably because she was within earshot of the aforementioned creepy freak.

Doctor Aro Valencia was a pioneer in medicine, my father had interned under him and he was coming to Forks to try to talk me into coming to his hospital in Italy when I was finished at Forks hospital.

My specialty was cardiology among children, and apparently there was a shortage of cardiologists who were also pediatricians in Italy. I doubted that was the case—Aro had always had this creepy, somewhat disturbing, obsession with me.

Even when I was a child he'd tell me things like I had surgeon's hands, or that I had the passion of a doctor. He always thought I'd be good with children, and he lamented the fact that he was not. I always secretly thought he wasn't good with kids because he was a closet pervert and child molester and kids could somehow sense that.

I'd always feared him as a child, every since I met him when I was seven years old, I thought he was weird. He always had the hospital smell, like it just clung to him no matter how many times he showered. As he aged it turned into more of a nursing home smell.

He terrified Alice; she practically refused to talk to him. She had the tendency to hide or schedule other events whenever he was coming to town. I knew she'd been thankful for Jasper this time around—he was her alibi. I'd seen her packing her overnight bag to go crash at Jasper's.

I'd done the big brotherly duty of inquiring if they were going to fast. She said they were in love and that it didn't matter. I rolled my eyes.

"Edward please hurry! Jasper's not supposed to pick me up for another three hours! I don't know if I can stand Aro for that long." She whined and then I heard a door close with a slam.

"I'll be there soon, Ali. Don't worry," I said as I turned around in the middle of the road to head home.

"Thanks Edward," she said and then she hung up.

I tossed my phone back into the cup holder and sped down the road. I hated talking to Aro; he always made my spine crawl.

It wasn't that I didn't want to go to Italy, it was such a wonderful opportunity to work there and live in such a fascinating country; but I didn't know if I wanted to leave the Cullens. They'd been my family for eighteen years; I really didn't remember anyone else.

My father would be proud of me if I went to Italy, but despite being a bit of a loner; I really didn't want to be that alone. I couldn't speak Italian, I'm sure that I would have been able to learn but something about being so far away and the only person I would know would be Aro kind of frightened me.

I was bigger and stronger than he, now; but, something about him still intimidated me. I felt like he knew things about me that I didn't know about myself, and that was eerie and disconcerting.

I pulled into the driveway warily. My father and Aro greeted me on the porch.

I shook hands with Aro and addressed him politely, "Good to see you Dr. Valencia."

"Ah, Edward," he said in heavily accented English, "you've grown into such a strapping young man."

I nodded and smiled. With his heavy accent I had to work hard to catch every word, my father had an accent too, but it wasn't hard to understand him. When it met Aro as a child I thought he had a speech impediment. I told my mother of that later, and she started to giggle. My father reprimanded me.

"I was just telling your father of a wonderful opportunity I've found for you," he said, sitting on the porch swing and patting the empty space beside him.

I sat as far away as I could and my father leaned against the porch railing.

"Now, Edward, I hear you've taken up pediatric cardiology, yes?" Aro asked, his white hair glinted in the pale light of the sun streaming through the thunderheads.

"I have, I'm still working in Forks hospital as an intern under Carlisle's guidance," I said nodding to my father who smiled reassuringly at me. I couldn't help but smile back.

"Ah yes, well I've recommended you as the head of pediatric cardiology at our hospital in Volterra," he said, opening his arms with Italian flourish.

I smiled and acted excited by the prospect of moving to Italy to be a doctor—and truthfully being the head of a department was a great opportunity as well as a huge responsibility.

"I'll definitely think about it, Dr. Valencia. Thank you so much for giving me this awesome opportunity," I said with a fake smile plastered on my face, I hoped that he couldn't tell that I was faking it.

If Aro had asked me two weeks ago if I would like to drop everything and move to Italy to become a workaholic doctor with no life, I would've given it some serious thought. But all I could think about was Bella. All thoughts of the position in Volterra gone, I was fantasizing about staying in the States and pursuing that fascinating young woman.

He smiled and looked like he wanted to say something else but my mother stuck her head out the front door and declared that lunch was ready. I sighed, relieved.

Aro stood up and walked into the house, I followed behind him but I felt a hand on my shoulder pulling me backwards.

"What's the matter, Edward?" My father asked, in his comforting, familiar English accent.

"Nothing, Carlisle," I said, bemused.

"You seem distracted, son."

I always hated how observant Carlisle was, and how I couldn't stand to lie to the man, "I'm just a little out of it. I'm sorry."

"What's bothering you?" He asked, and then he broke into a grin, "It's a girl isn't it?"

I smiled ruefully, "Is it that obvious?"

He laughed and clapped me on the back, "You just seem a little star struck. So who's the lucky young lady? Do I know her?"

"Maybe," I hedged, "I haven't officially asked her out yet. But I intend to." I said startled by how honest the statement was. I hadn't really admitted that to myself yet. I had a history of crappy relationships, and so to be so fascinated by Bella and to want to pursue her so ardently was quite a bizarre realization for me.

"Well what's her name?" He goaded.

"Bella Swan," I said, her name made butterflies spring up in my stomach, it was almost embarrassing. Almost.

"And where did you meet her?" He asked, opening the front door and pushing me through it.

"I know her through a mutual friend. One of the nurse's mother's is dating her father," I said. It was a hard relation to convey.

He laughed, "That sounds complicated."

"It is, but she's a beautiful young woman."

"I don't doubt that. You should invite her to dinner sometime. I'm sure Esme would be thrilled to see you with a young woman."

I'd never, in my many years of dating, brought a girl home to meet my parents. No one seemed good enough. It startled me to realize that I wanted Bella to meet my parents. Perhaps she would be different.

I laughed at myself a little, I was already infatuated with the girl and I'd only said two words to her. But I would soon remedy that. I started to think about her more intensely and I also wondered what happened to my not believing in love?

* * *

**First off, I'm really sorry it took me so long to reply to most everyone's reviews. FanfictionDOTnet was giving me some error message every time I tried to reply so it took forever to reply. But thank you to everyone who reviewed.**

**I've been working all this week so I haven't had much time to write...I'm a shoe fitter at a dance studio. Not the most fun job ever. But I get paid so I can't complain. Most of the kids I fit are really cute so it's not that bad, and the greater majority of them are well behaved...Ok I'll stop rambling about my job now, because you guys probably could care less.**

**Pregunta de la dia: Would you take a job in Italy, even if your boss was a creepy jerk like Aro? I probably wouldn't.**


	9. McDreamy in my Dreams

**Chapter 9: McDreamy in My Dreams**

"_Dream no small dreams for they have no power to move the hearts of men."  
__-Goethe_

I slept with the fortune under my pillow that night, and my dreams were filled with everything Edward. The way his messy red hair looked and how it would feel between my fingers. And his forest green eyes dark with passion.

I woke up gasping for breath and trembling.

I hummed when I made scrambled eggs for me and Charlie that morning. Charlie came into the kitchen and did a double-take.

"Morning, Bells," he said cautiously.

I wasn't ready to forgive him yet, despite the fact that my heart was on cloud nine. "I'm still angry at you, Dad."

"I don't blame you," he said rather placidly.

I quirked an eyebrow at him as I turned back to the stove.

"I shouldn't have sprung that on you, especially not on your birthday," he said, taking his seat at the table and staring at the fabric placemats.

"No, you shouldn't have," I said, scrapping the eggs around the skillet. "But what's done is done."

"I really am sorry, Bella."

"I know you are," I said honestly, "I don't blame you for keeping it from me."

"You have to understand it's not because I don't trust you, Bells. I was just nervous about how you'd take the news," he said, picking at the salt and pepper shakers.

"I wasn't mad that you were dating, Dad. You deserve to find someone—I was mad that you'd practically lied to me for God knows how long," I said, fury rising in a knot in my throat.

"I never wanted to lie to you, I was just so scared. You never had a Mom," he trialed off staring at me.

I couldn't help the tears that threatened to spill when he mentioned the mother-I-never-had. I never even knew her.

I sniffled and wiped my eyes with the back of my hand, "Bella. Don't cry, please don't cry. I didn't mean to upset you."

"Why did Mom leave me?" I exploded, and then instantly regretted the outburst. I'd never told Charlie about my insecurities concerning my mother.

"Bella, your mom didn't leave you, she left me." He said seriously, getting up from his seat and rubbing my back in slow circles.

"But she left me, too. I never got to meet her," I said, my chest heaving with sobs.

Charlie turned me around so that he was holding me against his chest and I was crying into his shoulder. "Bella, I'll never know the real reason why she left—but it was the biggest mistake of her life. She didn't have the privilege of knowing you, and that's something she missed out on."

"No it's not, I'm not worth knowing," I wailed, clutching the back of his shirt so hard I was fairly sure it would rip.

"Yes you are, baby, yes you are," he said softly. I hadn't heard my father use that tone with me for years. It was the same voice he used whenever I had scraped knees or broken bones in childhood. It was the voice he used when I cried after my first homecoming dance when Mike Newton tried to feel me up.

That tone transported me back to my childhood when my daddy was the hero of every story and he could right any wrong. When he was the only guy I could trust.

But there was this inkling feeling in the back of my mind that, despite the comfort my father was giving me, I was being held by the wrong pair of arms. My heart longed to be somewhere different.

I pulled away from my father and gave him a watery smile, "I'm trying, Daddy. I don't want to be mad at you anymore."

"I know, Bells. You know I'm sorry. Sue and I were wrong to keep it from you kids," he said.

I nodded, biting my lip and turned back to the stove. Our eggs were slightly burnt but fine to eat. I dished them onto two plates and brought them over to the table. My father and I ate in silence, both still a little wary to carry on a conversation.

I washed our plates and bade Charlie goodbye, he was planning on checking on things at the police station and then taking Sue out for dinner and a movie. I rolled my eyes at him when he told me his plans. He blushed like a boy.

I settled down on the couch, watching more TV Land reruns and reading the note Edward had left me in my book.

About noon someone knocked on the door and my heart started to soar. Maybe Edward had come back. I was so elated, so excited for that! When I opened the door, my heart dropped a little, but I wasn't too disappointed, Seth and Leah stood on my doorstep a box of pizza in hand.

I let them in and smiled. Leah, Seth and I ate pizza until we were sick to our stomachs. We told our favourite stories from when we were kids and Leah told embarrassing stories about Seth when he was a baby. He blushed and ate more pizza.

We laid in a tangle of blankets and pillows and limbs on the floor in front of the sofa. Seth fell asleep in the middle of The Princess Bride.

Leah smiled softly at her little brother and ran her fingers through his cropped, dark hair, "He's always such a deep sleeper."

I smiled at them. I'd always wanted a little brother. Perhaps, I had one. I smiled and snuggled closer to them. I really did feel like part of their family, it was a strange feeling.

"Leah?" I asked after a while, keeping my voice quiet so as to not wake Seth.

"Yeah?" She asked, turning to stare at me. Her face glowed blue from the light of the TV and it made her dark eyes almost look feral.

"Do you know Edward Masen-Cullen?" I asked.

"Oh, McDreamy! Yeah, we've worked a couple of ER shifts together," she said. "We both specialize in pediatrics, too."

"So he's a doctor?" I asked. Doctor was good. There was always something so hot about a man in a white lab coat, a stethoscope slung around his broad shoulders…

"Yeah, I think his specialty is pediatric cardiology or radiology or something, I don't really remember."

Wow. "What else do you know about him?"

"He's a little full of himself," she laughed, "he's the hottest thing on two legs that has ever walked the halls of Fork hospital, he sucks at card games, other than that I really don't know him very well. His dad's one of the head honchos at the hospital."

I nodded; I was fairly familiar with most of the doctors at the hospital due to my insufferable clumsiness and thus my many trips to the ER. I seemed to recall a Dr. Cullen.

"What's his dad look like?" I asked.

"Startlingly handsome for somebody with two grown kids, he's got a sexy accent, too," she said, fanning herself with her hand.

I giggled, I definitely remembered Dr. Cullen, he'd set my wrist when I'd fallen off the trampoline in the backyard when I was nine years old. I'd blushed my way through that trip to the emergency room.

"Are you guys talkin' bout girly stuff?" Seth asked in a groggy voice, rolling over so that he was pressed against my side.

"No," Leah said softly, winking at me, "go back to sleep."

"'k," he mumbled and then started to snore lightly.

Leah and I giggled together.

"He talks in his sleep," she told me, staring lovingly at her brother.

"So do I, only I say really embarrassing stuff," I said, scrunching my nose up. Leah laughed.

Charlie and Sue came home around midnight. Leah and I were in the kitchen, washing dishes and Seth was still asleep on the living room floor. Sue went in to try to wake him up but all he did was grunt and roll over. Leah and I wanted to dump a cup of cold water on him but Charlie wouldn't let us.

My dad managed to hoist him up enough to get him to lie on the couch so that he wouldn't get sore from sleeping on the floor. Leah told me she'd come over in the morning to bring him a change of clothes and his book bag so he wouldn't be late for school in the morning.

I had classes the next morning as well, so I bid everyone good night and went up to bed to dream about Edward, again.

The next morning I woke up happy and wishing I could stay in bed longer. I heard the shower on and assumed that Seth was showering. Charlie's police cruiser was already gone from the driveway and Sue's Accord was there instead.

I walked down into the kitchen where Leah and Sue were making a huge plate of pancakes.

"You can help yourself, Bella," Sue said kindly, indicating with her spatula the already set out plates on the kitchen table.

"Thank you," I said and went to eat. I had three pancakes before Seth came down the stairs; his hair was wet and hung in his face like little streaks of India ink.

"I'm going to go shower, thanks for breakfast, Sue," I said, putting my plate in the sink.

I showered quickly and dressed in a pair of loose jeans and a band T. Everyone was gone but Leah when I walked down the stairs, my book bag in hand.

I raised my eyebrows at her as she sat at the kitchen table, sipping chai tea out of paper cup and reading my copy of Wuthering Heights.

"No wonder you were asking so many questions about McDreamy," she said, a small smile playing at the corners of her lips.

I instantly felt my face heat up. I was angry and embarrassed; those words were only intended for me! Edward wrote them for me!

"Relax, would you, the book was open to the inside cover and I got to it before Charlie did. Admittedly I shouldn't have read it, but it's just too good to be true. McDreamy never flirts with girls, and now he's finally found someone. It's so exciting!" She laughed, handing the book back to me.

"He hasn't flirted with me," I said quietly.

"Oh yeah and the love letter he wrote you doesn't count?" She asked, getting up from the table and walking towards the front door.

"I need a ride to work," she said with a mischievous smile, "can you give me a lift? Who knows maybe a certain pediatric cardiologist will be on duty?"

* * *

**I love Leah. I feel like she's misunderstood. [sighs] I haven't written this story in over a week. I'm kind of close to it ending, but not really...but I've been preoccupied with work and I start school soon, so hopefully I'll finish this story up soon. It'll probably be around 25-30 chapters. **

**Please Review!!! Please.**

**What's your favourite movie to watch late at night with friends and/or family? I'd probably stick with The Princess Bride. **


	10. That's Terribly Romantic

**Chapter 10: That's Terribly Romantic**

"_The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread."  
__-Mother Teresa_

We discussed the position in Italy to death. By the end of the evening I was sick and tired of hearing about how beautiful Volterra was and how much I would love it there, or how much the hospital needed me, could not survive without me.

I ditched my parents and Aro on Sunday to go into Seattle and visit my favourite music store there. I sat in the back for hours on the baby grand they had there. I played all of the symphonies and concertos I could think of and then I started taking requests from the people in the store. I finished it up with my own rendition of "Piano Man" by Billy Joel.

The older couple that owned the story loved me because I brought in a lot of costumers and any tips I got from the day I'd give to them. It wasn't like I needed them.

They always fixed me lunch and tried to set me up with their granddaughter who was still in high school. I laughed and told them I was taken, which wasn't so much of a lie this time around.

They told me I had to bring my special young lady to meet them. I told them I'd try my best to bring her to the music store.

I met Alice and Jasper for dinner at a small café in the heart of Seattle; we sat on the patio in front of the restaurant despite the constant threat of rain.

I could tell from the way Jasper and Alice acted around each other that he was a keeper. He seemed to adore Alice.

Jasper ordered a beer, Alice got a glass of water with a lime and I got a sweet tea and scanned the menu—wishing I had Bella sitting beside me, wondering what her favourite food was.

"Edward, what are you going to get?" Alice whined at me.

"I don't know," I muttered, still scanning the menu and trying my hardest to concentrate.

"Edward, it's not that big of a menu, what's your problem?" Alice she asked, squeezing the lime into her water and stirring it with her straw. She reached for the sugar packets and grabbed three, pouring them into her water as well.

"Nothing's wrong, I just can't decide what I want," I said, furrowing my eyebrows and rereading the entrees for the third time.

Our waitress arrived at our table, leaning down so that both Jasper and I caught an eyeful of her ample bust. Jasper didn't seem to notice, he seemed too preoccupied with playing with the hem of Alice's short dress—and despite my noticing I couldn't help my thoughts that strayed to Bella and her perfect, feminine form.

"What will you all be eating today?" Our waitress purred.

"I want a salad, my boyfriend wants a hamburger and I don't know what my brother wants," Alice said, crossing her arms across her chest and glaring daggers at the waitress.

"I want the mushroom ravioli," I said, picking an item at random, and then fishing my iPod out of my pocket to see if I would get on the Internet there.

Our waitress sighed and said she'd be right back. She could take her time; I wasn't that hungry and I wasn't in a hurry to be eye-raped again.

"Put that away, Edward, we need to talk," Alice snapped, settling against Jasper's side.

"What do you need, Ali, I just want to check my email," I said, not putting my iPod down.

"Edward! Please, talk to me!" She whined.

"Fine," I replied, stuffing my iPod back into my pocket. "What's the matter?"  
"What's going on with you lately?" She asked, looking at me with unneeded concern, "You seem so distracted, and I know it's not because of this stupid mess with Italy and Dr. Valencia."

I sighed, unlike with Carlisle I had no qualms with lying to my sister, "I'm not sure if I want to go there with him. I'm mean, he's a creepy psycho; but it's a great opportunity."

"That's not what's really bothering you, Edward," Alice said shrewdly, glowering at me.

I had to bite the inside of my cheek so I wouldn't smirk, "Why would I lie to you, sister dear?"

"Gee, I don't know—you do it often enough, you pretend like I can't tell but I can. Every. Single. Time," she said, her words precise as she stared at me. I looked back into her light green eyes and sighed.

"I met a girl."

She squealed and tossed herself over the table and into my arms, "Jesus, Alice, I haven't even gone a date with this girl yet!"

"But you'll actually talk about her, she's a keeper!" Alice said smiling from ear to ear.

"What do you mean 'you'll actually talk about her'?" I asked, tilting my head to the side as my sister took her seat next to Jasper.

"You always hide your girlfriends, you never bring anyone home—heck I had to snoop through your closet to figure out you were dating that Tanya skank. And the only reason I found out about that was because one of your shirts smelled like J. Lo Glo."

My mouth popped open as I stared at the little terror I called my sister, "What do you mean you snooped around my closet?"

Jasper hid his face in Alice's hair as he laughed.

"It's not funny, man, soon she'll be doing it to you," I said seriously. Alice would, I had no doubt in my mind about that.

"I have nothing to hide," he said. He looked so amused by this whole situation.

I sat back in my chair crossly and started to pout like a child. "Your being an incorrigible busybody aside," I said staring at my darling sister, "why is this so exciting that I've found a girl I'm interested in?"

"Because, Big Brother! You're willing to talk about her; she's not some poorly kept secret of yours!" Alice explained like it was so easy to understand. I still didn't comprehend her logic, but it seemed to make sense to her so I didn't pry.

"When did you meet this girl?" Alice asked, practically bouncing up and down in her seat. Jasper had his head resting against her shoulder and I'm surprised he didn't get motion sickness.

"I officially met her yesterday morning," I said cautiously, gauging Alice's reaction.

"So that's where you were when Dr. Creepy arrived! But what do you mean you 'officially met her' yesterday?" Alice asked.

"Well, I've seen her two before, but I introduced myself yesterday morning when I stopped by her house."

"You went to her house?!" Alice screeched, slamming her hands down onto the table with enough force to splash the first couple of inches of liquid out of our cups.

"Shh, Alice I don't think people heard you in Zimbabwe!" I said in a fierce whisper. We were already getting weird stares from the other people eating on the patio. I glared at my little sister, and she managed to look somewhat abashed.

"Fine, you went to her house?" She said in a stage whisper, leaning across the table to glare at me.

"Yes, to return her book," I sighed, glancing around at the people still giving us weird looks.

"What book?" Alice asked, her brow furrowed in confusion.

I sighed and conceded defeat, "I first saw her at the Chinese restaurant after you and Jasper left."

"You were at the restaurant?" Jasper asked, looking between me and Alice.

"Yeah, I was there to crash your date if things didn't work out," I said with a smirk, fully enjoying the enraged look on my sister's face. "I was supposed to spill my drink on her if you weren't worthy of her."

He smiled, "I'm glad you didn't have to spill your drink on her."

"I'm glad, too," I said smiling at him.

"Anyways," Alice said loudly, interrupting us, "so you saw this girl after we left for Jasper's apartment?"

"Yeah, she was having a private celebration with her father, it was her birthday. He said something to upset her and he left, she stayed in tears and then left as well. She left her birthday present on the table. I picked it up and took it with me."

"Edward! What if she went back to the restaurant looking for it?" Alice tsked.

"I gave it back to her! I defended, anyways the next time I saw her was at the hospital; she was dropping one of the nurses off."

"Which nurse?" Alice asked, she was fairly familiar with the hospital staff because of my father's and mine ties to the hospital.

"Leah Clearwater," I said, toying with the paper wrapper from my straw.

"How in the world does your mystery girl know Leah?" Alice asked.

"Leah's mother is dating her father," I said.

"Ah, that's a sticky situation. Parents dating," Alice said.

"Yeah, neither of them seem too happy about it," I said. "But thanks to Leah I found out my mystery woman's name and where she lived and I was able to return her book."

"Oh that's terribly romantic," Alice swooned, putting another packet of sugar into her water.

"Not really, it's more stalker-ish and creepy," I admitted, blushing slightly.

"No, it's romantic Edward. You sought her out," Alice said. Our waitress came back and put out food in front of us, after another failed attempt to catch my eye.

We ate slowly, our bites interspersed by Alice grilling me for information about Bella. I should've been embarrassed to talk so openly about a woman to my little sister but yet again, with Bella I was surprised by how open I was about her.

Maybe she would be different, after all.

* * *

**There will be more drama. Let that be known. After they 'meet' for real, things aren't all puppies and kittens and rainbows. So, for those getting complacent, and thinking this story is going to be all peachy keen, REALITY CHECK it's not. But that's all I'm sayin'.**

**Have you ever had a predetermined idea about a boy [or girl, if there are any male readers out there] that was as open and hopeful as Edward is of Bella? I know I have, and that idea was totally crushed. Oh well, we all can't find our Edwards.**


	11. Camera Phones and Questions

**Chapter 11: Camera Phones and Questions**

"_Parting is all we know of heaven, and all we need of hell.__"  
-__Emily Dickinson_

I pulled into the parking lot a little late on Monday morning. My father and I had spent the majority of the night arguing about the position in Italy. I was torn between going and not, and my father wanted me to go but he also wanted me to stay. So we argued both sides until my mother came downstairs and put a stop to the debate.

I scrubbed the palm of my hand across my jaw and cheeks, and lamented the fact that I hadn't had time to shave that morning. I felt gross and tired and just wanted to go back to sleep.

I was still in a daze as I made my way to the nurse's station on the pediatrics floor. I'd finally seen the end of my ER days. I threw my lab coat on one of the chairs behind the desk and made a beeline for the coffee pot.

"Morning, McDreamy," I heard a familiar voice say.

"Good morning," I said in return, stifling a yawn. I heard her giggle and fought the urge to turn around to see what was so funny.

"Rough night?" Leah asked.

"No," I replied, pouring myself a cup of coffee from behind the desk and drinking it black.

"So were you dreaming of Bella Swan, then?"

I stiffened and almost dropped my cup of scalding hot coffee. I rounded to glare at her but stopped short, because sitting right beside Leah was Bella Swan.

"Hello," she said, smiling softly, a red hot blush colouring her cheeks.

I couldn't find my voice to respond. My eyes darted between Bella and Leah, the latter of whom looked very smug.

"Thank you for my book," Bella said softly, lifting the tome from her lap and waving it at me.

"No problem," I choked out, I took a long swig of my coffee, thinking that perhaps I was just dreaming. It would certainly be a nice dream, and I wouldn't be complaining, but it definitely wasn't real.

I blinked a little and she was still there. Wow. She was still there and I was standing there like a complete, brain-dead moron.

Bella smiled reassuringly at me as I continued to process her standing right there. She turned to Leah, "I really should get going; I'll be late for my classes."

Leah nodded and my head cleared a little.

"Let me walk you out," I said, surprising myself just a bit.

Her eyes snapped up to meet mine and I smiled reassuringly, at least I hoped it was reassuringly. She nodded, her long dark hair, falling past her shoulders and over her face. My hands twitched to brush it away.

I set my coffee cup on the desk and offered her my arm. She wrapped her arm through mine and let me lead her to the elevator. We waited in companionable silence as the elevators rose to the fourth floor.

We got in and I pushed the button for the ground level.

"So," I began, rocking back on my heels and peeking at her askance.

"So," she said, smiling a beautiful, heart-stopping smile.

I smirked at her and she blushed, ducking her head so that it was hidden behind a curtain of hair. This time, I didn't resist the urge to sweep it over her shoulder; I reached out and brushed it back, revealing her beautiful face to me.

She looked at me through the fringe of her thick dark lashes, her lip held between her teeth.

"What now?" I asked, completely bemused.

"I don't know," she said softly, staring at the changing, digital numbers above the elevator doors.

"What do you think should happen now?" I challenged, not ready to admit what I wanted to happen out loud.

"Honestly?" She asked, her shoulders hunched forward as she gripped her elbows tightly, her arms crossed tightly across the book, pressed to her chest.

"Honesty is the best policy," I said with a charming smile.

She grinned sheepishly, "I'd like to get to know you more."

"I've wanted to get to know you ever since I took your book from the restaurant," I confessed gauchely, running a hand through my unruly hair.

"So how do we do that?" She asked, ringing her hands around her book's spine.

"How about I take you out for dinner, how does Wednesday at seven sound?" I asked, butterflies tickling my stomach.

"Wednesday at seven sounds perfect," she said, nodding her head and smiling shyly at me.

"Can I have your phone number?" I asked, leading her out of the elevator as the doors opened slowly.

She nodded slightly and fished around her pockets for her Blackberry. I handed her my cell and we exchanged numbers. I walked her all the way to the automatic front doors, she turned to wave at me and I snapped her picture with my camera phone.

"What was that for?" She asked, her straight eyebrows furrowing together in the center.

"So I can look at the most beautiful girl ever, whenever I want to," I teased, winking at her.

She blushed and I snapped another picture. "Now what was that one for?" She demanded.

"Because you blush so pretty," I said, pocketing my phone. It was true; the way the apples of her cheeks flushed with colour was absolutely amazing. She was so beautiful.

She huffed and turned away.

"Bye-bye, Bella," I said.

She waved over her shoulder, "Bye, Edward!"

I chuckled to myself and turned around to reenter the building. I rode the elevator up to the fourth floor, staring at her picture on my phone the entire time. I liked the one where she was blushing better.

She had a slight smile on her face, a shine in her eyes and her cheeks were a delicious, candy apple red.

"Look at that McDreamy is back with a dopey smile on his face," Leah said, straightening the hem of her Toy Story scrubs.

"I suppose I have you to thank for this, so I really shouldn't make a snappy comeback, should I?" I asked, grinning at her.

"No and your welcome. So when's the wedding?" She asked, sticking a pencil behind her ear, her dark eyes dancing.

The look on my face must have been hilarious, or at least Leah found it so because she laughed uproariously, "Geez, Doc, I'm just kidding!"

I nodded and pursed my lips, "What kind of food does she like to eat?"

"How am I supposed to know?" Leah asked, "Wait. Oh my God! You're taking her on a date!"

"You don't have to announce it to the entire floor—but yes I'm taking her on a date," I said proudly.

"Good, she needs to date someone," Leah said pointedly.

"Why do you say that?" I asked, grabbing my stethoscope and slinging it over my shoulder.

"She's lonely," Leah shrugged, taking off towards one of the rooms.

I knew the feeling well. Even though I had the Cullens, I still felt lonely from time to time. It was almost incurable. Despite having my mother, father and sister there was still a rift in my heart, but I believed unreservedly that Bella could fill that void.

I made me rounds of the pediatrics floor. Most of the kids were in there for appendicitis or tonsillectomies, but there were some that had cancer and it made my heart hurt. There was one little boy who'd just been in a car accident and I spent a great deal of time with him.

He had a leg in a cast and several long, deep lacerations covering his plump cheeks. He was wide-eyed and earnest and said what he thought. His honesty was refreshing.

We made paper airplanes together and I tried to take his mind off the father he had lost in the accident.

"Doctor Edward?" He asked, looking up at me with dark blue eyes.

"Yeah, buddy?" I asked, streamlining our latest model of paper aircraft.

"Is my daddy in heaven?"

My heart clenched painfully at the small question. I remembered asking a similar question of my childhood doctor.

"Yep, I'm sure he is. And guess what?" I asked, smiling at the boy.

"What?" He asked; his eyes undulated with fat tears.

"I'm sure he's probably with my daddy, too" I said, wiping away the tears that were spilling out of his large eyes.

"Your daddy's in heaven, too?" He whispered a little brokenly.

"Yeah," I said softly, holding the little boy tightly in my arms. He was small and warm and trembling, and I wanted so badly to take him home with me.

One of the nurses on duty stuck her head in and told me that I had other patients to check on. I nodded and stood from the bed.

"Alright, Benjamin," I said, addressing the broken little boy, "I have to go now. You should get some sleep."

"I'm not sleepy," he said defiantly.

I grinned at him, "Big boys need their sleep."

He hunkered down in his bed and started to fake snore. One of his dark blue eyes cracked open to see if I was still there. I laughed out loud and mussed his brown hair. "Go to sleep, for real. I'll bring you some ice cream later if you do!"

"Ok!" He chirped and rolled over, pressing his face against his pillow. I hit the light switch and closed his door quietly behind me. I stood with my back pressed against the door, and flipped my cell phone out. My heart was hurting, and I just wanted to see Bella.

* * *

**Sorry, this is kind of late. I was originally going to post this morning, but my schedule got thrown off. I started my senior year of high school this morning. So it's my last first day. Now that I'm back in school [and have a sort of demanding work load] I might have issues with updating as reguarly as I've been. I have most of this story written, but I'll be busy with school work and won't have much Internet time, so please excuse me if I'm late/early on updates.**

**Thanks for everyone's support of this story! And I'll apologize in advance for iffy updates.**

**Do you have a camera phone? I don't. My phone fails.**


	12. The Elite Group of Women

**Chapter 12: The Elite Group of Women**

"_Woman is a miracle of divine contradictions."  
__-Jules Michelet_

I hemmed and hawed in front of my closet on Wednesday afternoon. I had no idea where Edward was taking me, I had no idea how to dress and I most certainly was not going to relent and call him to ask.

"Bells, what's the problem?" My dad asked, standing awkwardly in my doorway. I'm sure I was probably banging around a lot and it had startled him.

"I can't find something to wear," I mumbled, pressing the heels of my hands against my eyes.

"Well, what's wrong with what you're wearing right now?" He asked, indicating to my jeans and Forks Police Department T-shirt. There were lots of things wrong with it, at the top of the list the fact that I looked like a prepubescent boy.

"Dad!" I whined, stomping my foot and glaring at him.

"Bells, I don't see what the issue is, it's not like you're going on a date," he said, leaning against the door jamb.

I swallowed thickly and looked sheepishly at my father. All off the blood drained from his face and he turned purple very quickly. "Breath, Dad, breath!"

"You're going on a date?" He demanded.

"Yeah?" I asked, wincing.

"With who!" He demanded.

"Edward Masen-Cullen," I said, staring at the sad contents of my closet.

"Do you know him from school?"

"No," I said, moving hangers around as if it would magically make a cute, chic outfit appear.

"Well how do you know him?" Charlie demanded, his face still purplish.

"I met him mutually through Leah, he's a doctor at the hospital," I said, deciding on leaving out the part about my book. Charlie probably wouldn't like that too much.

Charlie blinked a little, "So he's a doctor, is he?"

"Yep," I said, still searching my closet futilely.

"I guess that's ok, then," my dad mumbled. I laughed a little hysterically.

"So it was an issue when he thought he was a ho-hum college student, but when he's a doctor it makes it all better?" I asked, still laughing at a histrionic level.

"No necessarily, but at least it means he's smart," Charlie huffed and plodded down the stairs, leaving me to face my closet dilemma on my own.

I finally settled on a long, khaki skirt that was probably the most feminine thing I owned that I paired with a navy blue button-down. I looked in the full-length mirror on the inside of my closet door.

"I look like a librarian or a Mennonite" I mumbled, blushing.

There was a knock on the front door and librarian Mennonite would have to be good enough because I was most certainly not going to let Edward be alone with my father for too long.

When I came down the stairs they were sitting at the kitchen table, talking civilly. Edward was dressed casually, jeans that were slung low on his hips and a white dress shirt, unbuttoned at the top so I caught a glimpse of the T-shirt he wore beneath. He looked absolutely…edible.

He stood from the table quickly and smiled at me, "Hi, Bella."

I blushed and studied the tops of my Converse, "Hi, Edward."

"Ok," Charlie said, "well you two kids have fun now"—he ushered us to the door—"and Edward, if you hurt my baby girl I'll kill you and bury you under the hammock in the backyard."

With that he shut the front door in our rather bemused faces. We could hear him laughing inside.

"Ignore him, he's gone crazy in his old age," I told Edward.

He laughed and looped his arm around my waist, "He's fine. It didn't frighten me."

"Why not!" I demanded, heck it'd frightened me! "My father just threatened to murder you and bury you in our yard and that doesn't scare you?"

Edward shrugged, "He said he'd do it if I hurt you, I don't plan on hurting you so I won't be murdered and buried in your backyard."

I stared at him for a long time. If he didn't plan on eventually breaking up with me because I was too boring or clingy or just plain annoying what did he plan on doing?

He helped me into the passenger seat of his Volvo, and then trotted around to the driver's side. I was amazed by how graceful and lithe he was. He really was beautiful.

"So where are we going?" I asked once he'd slid the keys into the ignition and started the car.

He just shook his head, his gorgeous eyes sparkling, "It's a surprise."

I groaned and let my head fall back against the seat, "I hate surprises."

"That's half the fun of it," he laughed, driving one handed; his other hand was draped leisurely on the gearshift. He had an automatic transmission so I boldly reached over and grabbed his hand. I wove our fingers together.

He looked over at me and smiled, so I took that as an affirmation that my being bold was a-ok with him.

He rubbed his thumb across my knuckles and my palm started to tingle and sweat and I hoped he didn't notice. How embarrassing would that be to have him have my sweat all over his hand because I was such a loser that I couldn't hold a man's hand without perspiring like an Olympic athlete.

"So tell me, Bella, are you enjoying college?"

I hadn't expected him to really ask me questions. I actually don't know what I expected but it took me several moments to gather my thoughts and respond. "I think it's alright. It's just like high school minus some of the drama and plus more drama only different drama."

"I take it you don't like drama?" He asked, amused.

I shook my head and worried at my bottom lip, "I was never really part of the drama back in high school I usually found it funny to watch from the sidelines, but after a while it gets old. That's why I don't date, because it causes too much production."

"Ah, so this isn't a date, then?" Edward asked. His face was smooth and emotionless but I could tell from his eyes he was more than a little disappointed.

I scrambled to undo my mistake, "No! I mean, yes! Yes, this is a date. I just don't date my peers, I mean. It's just…The boys at my school are…Oh geez, I can't explain it." I mumbled pulling my hand away from his so that I could bury my raging blush into my palms.

Edward chuckled musically, "I understand exactly. You find the boys you attend school with to be less mature, and you don't want to mix your schooling with your private life."

I nodded.

"Leah told me you don't date," I blurted out. My growing case of verbal vomit was going to be embarrassing; I needed to turn my brain-mouth-filter on.

Edward seemed entertained by that. "I don't date for the same reason you don't usually date. I think that most of the women I know—excluding only a handful—are rather shallow and dimwitted. The only women I'm really acquainted with are the nurses at the hospital and it wouldn't be proper to date a coworker."

I nodded, and then slipped my hand back into Edward's.

"What handful of women do you thin aren't dimwitted or shallow?" I asked, parrying his statement from before.

"Well, you're one of them," he said, taking his eyes off the road just long enough to shoot me a smoldering look that turned my insides to mush. "My mother is probably one of the smartest women I know. She's like a mix between Mother Teresa, Jackie Kennedy and Martha Stewart—minus the whole jailbird thing."

"That's quite the pairing," I said. I was getting a very strange mental image of his mother and I wasn't sure I liked it. Rather than dwelling on his seemingly-schizoid mom I steered him back to the original topic.

"Who else is in this exclusive group of women?"

"My younger sister Alice, though she can be a little shallow at times, I still admire her. She never gives less than 110 percent in anything she does. She could be brushing her teeth and she does it as best as she can."

I chuckled at the mental image. "You shouldn't laugh," he warned, "she wants to meet you. You'll be her new best friend. She doesn't befriend people easily but she'll like you."

I smiled, but something inside of me was snapping.

"Anyone else in this elite group of people?" I asked lightly, trying to ignore the sinking feeling in my stomach.

He pursed his lips as he thought and I had the insufferable urge to trace the pout of his lips with my thumb, "Some of the nurses are alright, I guess. Leah's ok, she frightens me, though. She's the only younger nurse that doesn't flirt with me."

I nodded, "She just got out of a long relationship."

"I kind of figured she did, sometimes she gets this sad look in her eyes whenever she thinks no one is looking," he said.

"You're very good at reading people," I intoned.

"Most of the time," he admitted, "I find you very hard to read."

I actually blushed, "I don't think I'm hard to read at all. I would think I'd be rather easy."

"No," he said softly, "there's depth to you that I find fascinatingly inaccessible. Makes me want to figure out what's going on inside that pretty head of yours."

My face heated up so badly, I was afraid I would spontaneously combust. Especially with the smoldering look Edward was giving me.

He laughed and extricated his hand from mine. His fingers delicately cradled my cheek, "I love it when you blush."

I blushed even more; I could feel it creepy down my neck onto my chest. Edward smirked at my reaction and kept driving.

* * *

**First week of senior year can be described as one thing: a roller coaster. It seriously had its ups and downs. I'm taking a course for college credit this semester, so hopefully I'll still be able to have time to work on this story. Hopefully it will help this story considering it's a class on creative writing... I think I need some serious instruction on the subject.**

**Reviews are much appreciated!!**

**Who is a woman you greatly admire? I admire my mom. We're similar in so many ways.**


	13. Love is Death

**Chapter 13: Love is Death**

"_Isabella, stand a little bit taller.  
__I don't deserve the tears anymore than you deserve the fears that I have left you with, dear!  
__Oh, my I bless your every last tear."  
__-"Sugar Skulls" by Envy on the Coast_

She was amazingly beautiful and utterly fascinating. I was captivated by her. She had questioned me about my parents, my job and my aspirations for the future. She had started to fire questions at me in rapid succession.

"I know your father is a police chief, but I didn't know you were trained in methods of interrogation," I joked.

She hid her face behind the curtain of her hair and I could see the tips of her ears turn red. I chuckled.

"Don't be embarrassed," I said softly. I didn't want her to be uncomfortable around me.

"I'm sorry," she mumbled, "I am interrogating you, aren't I?"

I smiled for her, "I don't mind. I was just teasing you."

She nodded but kept her mouth shut. I sighed and hoped I hadn't upset her.

"So, Bella, tell me about your family."

She frowned slightly and I was beginning to think I'd said something wrong.

"It's always been my dad and I," she started and then drew in a deep breath, "I never really met my mom. Two days after I was born she got discharged from the hospital and she left me there. My dad brought the car around to pick us up but she was gone. One of the nurses saw her hitch a ride with some guy. The last time we heard from her she was on a plane to God knows where and she told Charlie not to follow her. As far as I know, she's forgotten about Charlie and me."

My mouth dropped open at her tale. No wonder there was such a deep, inaccessible sadness behind her eyes.

I pulled into the restaurant's parking lot and took her hand. "I'm sorry, Bella. It was her loss."

"That's what my dad always tells me," she said, her voice thick with emotions.

I rubbed my thumb across her knuckles. She pulled her hand away from mine so she could open her door. I walked around to stand beside her. She placed her hand back in mine and warmth spread through my body.

The teenage hostess seated us at our table quickly. The setting was intimate. The restaurant had dim lighting; the tables decorated with sparse candles and pressed tablecloths.

Bella still had undulated tears in her eyes.

"I truly am sorry, Bella. I shouldn't have pried."

"It's alright, Edward," she said, reaching across the table to take both of my hands into hers.

"If it's any consolation to you, I know how you feel," I mumbled.

She gave me a puzzled look.

"I never really got to know my biological parents," I told her.

"Doctor Cullen isn't your real father?" She asked, bemused.

"No," I said quietly. "I was born to Edward and Elizabeth Masen. Carlisle and Esme adopted me when I was young."

Her eyes held such emotion that I couldn't decipher it.

I was glad that she didn't press for further information about my birth parents. She sat there quietly with those unreadable eyes and stared at me.

A peppy waiter materialized at my elbow and asked overzealously for our drink orders. Bella got a sweet tea and I got a Coke. Our waiter leered at Bella before stalking off towards the kitchen.

Bella giggled, snapping my attention back to her.

"Geez, Edward, if looks could kill that poor boy would be as dead as a doornail," she snorted.

I arched an eyebrow and she smiled at me innocently. "He was looking at you inappropriately. Doesn't that bother you?"

"Not really," she shrugged.

"He did inappropriate things to you with his eyes and that doesn't bother you?" I asked incredulously.

"Even if it bothers me, he won't stop, so why should I let it get to me?" She asked, picking at the napkin dispenser.

I fumed quietly, "It should bother you, Bella."

"I'm not worth the trouble," she muttered.

"You think you're worthless do you?"

She pursed her lips, "I'm not going to dignify that with an answer."

"You do don't you!" I said in a harsh whisper. I thought she was so beautiful, so kind, so utterly and heartbreakingly perfect. And she thought she was worthless. Call that poetic justice.

"So what if I do!" She shot back, clutching the edge of the table between, slender pale fingers.

"Bella!" I ground out through my teeth, "How could you possibly think that you're worthless?"

"I just do, alright. If you don't understand then that's your problem!" She said, her lips turning pale as the rest of her face burned.

"Jesus, Bella! At least give me a chance! Explain it to me!" I exclaimed harshly.

She made a high-pitched keening noise in the back of her throat and stood up from the table quickly.

"I'm sorry, Edward you deserve someone better."

"There is no one better," I said, catching her arm. She wrenched it away from me with more force than I though she possessed.

"Bella wait," I called after her as she stalked to the bathroom.

I waited rather impatiently for her to come back. She didn't come back. In fact her father came in. I could feel all of the blood drain from my face as he stalked towards my table.

"Chief Swan," I squeaked, my voice as high pitched as it had been when I was in middle school.

"Where's my baby?" He demanded. His face was a startling shade of dark purple. I knew he was about to shoot me. I could feel it.

"She went to the bathroom," I mumbled and then waved the waiter down for our check. I paid for our drinks—which neither of us drank thanks to my being an imbecile—and went to stand by the Volvo.

I leaned against the hood when she came out, "I'm so sorry Bella. I didn't mean to offend you."

She'd been crying, and I felt like a total idiot. I'd made a girl cry. I'd had girlfriend before but I'd never really made any of them cry before…even when I broke up with them. They just got malicious and hateful.

But Bella cried.

"If I hear of you even breathing in my daughter's direction ever again, I'll arrest you Dr. Masen-Cullen, I don't care how influential your father is. I'll lock your sorry butt up for the rest of eternity if you make my little girl cry again," Chief Swan said in a deadly even voice.

I tried to catch a glimpse of Bella but she hid behind her hair.

I nodded to Chief Swan and got into my Volvo. I drove home as fast I could. I didn't even car that Chief Swan was probably watching me peel down the streets of Forks at a breakneck pace.

I pulled into the garage of my family's home at stared at my steering wheel. My sweaty palms had left wet prints against the leather.

My father was in the garage working on his Mercedes with Rosalie.

"You're back early," he remarked, paying more attention to whatever was going on under the hood of his car than to me. For which I was grateful.

"Yeah, I don't think this thing with Bella is going to work out," I said quietly, trying to hide how I truly felt about my failed endeavor after Bella Swan.

"What do you mean?" My father asked, straightening up. He had grease matting his fine, blonde hair. The sight would've been comical if I hadn't have felt like I was having a heart attack at the age of 24.

"I made her cry, Carlisle," I said quietly.

"Oh for crying out loud," Rosalie groaned, rolling her eyes. She'd, of course, been eavesdropping on a conversation I really didn't want her to be a part of.

"Rosalie, as surprising as this is, I really don't want you to be part of this conversation," I snapped at her. She flipped her long blonde hair over one shoulder and scowled at me.

"I don't understand how you can be such an idiot, Edward. You've ruined one too many good relationships. It doesn't make sense."

"It makes perfect sense, Rosalie," I growled at her.

"Edward, calm down," my father said, putting one hand to my chest and pushing me backwards.

"I don't need to be calm, father!" I shouted at him, something in me snapped and I pushed him away and retreated back into the Volvo. The engine groaned awake with a great purr.

I roared out of the garage without regard to Carlisle or Rosalie or Esme who was standing on the porch yelling something after me.

My cell phone vibrated in the cup holder and I saw that it was Alice. I flipped the phone open and then closed it quickly. I hoped she would get the message.

She didn't.

For the next hour she and Emmett texted and called me relentlessly. Once the other was done leaving some heated, vulgar message on my phone the next person in line would send me more heated, vulgar messages.

It was a vicious cycle. One that I deserved, but at the time it was a minor annoyance.

Finally, after about an hour of them calling nonstop I chucked my cell phone out of the open window. I would probably be sorry about that later, but then I didn't care. Nothing could touch me.

I thought about Mom and Dad. And how much they loved each other. And I thought about Bella and how I could have loved her. But the truth was love was nothing more than a fleeting emotion created by some cruel higher power to manipulate mortals. I wouldn't be easily swayed to love. It had killed my parents, and I wouldn't let it kill me.

* * *

**Who expected **_**that**_**?! Sorry, people, I warned you that there would be more drama. So there. There's your drama!! Don't worry, this is a love story, so there will be love. But love isn't easy, so this won't be easy.**

"_**I'm sorry, Edward you deserve someone better."…"There is no one better." **_**Stole that line from Real Life. I was breaking up with my boyfriend and I told him that he deserved someone better and that's exactly what he said to me. "There is no one better." I cried.**

**I went on a writing binge this weekend, and have FINISHED THIS STORY!! That's right, Fortune Cookies has been all written. Yay. So, I'll be updating this story on MONDAY, WEDNESDAY, and FRIDAY!! There will be 29 chapters and an epilogue.**

**What's the worst line a guy [or girl, for you male readers] has said to you? Mine is totally that "there is no one better". I felt like crap after he told me that.**


	14. Fortresses and Forgetting

**Chapter 14: Fortresses and Forgetting**

"_God I want to dream again, take me where I've never been,  
__I wanna go there, this time I'm not scared,  
__Now I am unbreakable, it's unmistakable,  
__No one can touch me, nothing can stop me."  
__-"Unbreakable" by Fireflight_

Dad drove me home after my disaster of a first date with Edward. I sobbed the entire way home. He was antsy and dressed nicely and I didn't know why.

When Charlie ventured to ask me what was wrong, I wailed at him, "I'm worthless!"

He opened his mouth to reprimand me, but sagely left the sentence unsaid. I don't think I would've been able to handle it again. I hated to be lied to. It wasn't fair. Life wasn't fair.

I ran upstairs and found my copy of Wuthering Heights. I ripped the title page out of the book and yanked the fortune out from under my pillow. I held them fisted in one hand, a Zippo lighter in the other.

I flipped it open and let the little orange flame dance under the papers.

I sighed and snapped it closed. I couldn't bring myself to burn them. I pried my floorboards open and dumped them beneath the wood. I nailed the floorboard back on, using one of my heavier shoes as a hammer and tried to forget about Edward. I deleted his contact from my phone and pretended like I'd never met him.

My father pounded on my bedroom door, "Bella, please talk to me."

"No! Go away."

"Isabella, this isn't going to help anything!" He warned.

I really didn't care. Edward had seen right through my façade and I fully planned on building back up my walls. Edward had torn me down. He was Ronald Reagan, I was the Berlin Wall. It wasn't fair. I wanted to be strong.

I'd relied on that throughout my childhood and my adolescence. And then Edward had waltzed in with those pretty looks of his and had seen right through my artfully constructed barriers and I'd crumbled like Feta cheese.

I wished for someone to talk to, someone that would understand.

"Bella, Sue was supposed to come over for dinner while you were out, do you want me to call her and tell her not to come?" Charlie asked. Bless him, he knew me well enough to know that I would be upset to be the third wheel.

I felt guilty for letting Charlie call off his date just because mine had crashed and burned.

I surprised myself when I called back, "No, Charlie. I'll just stay out of your way."

I'm sure he was surprised, too; because he didn't say a word. I heard his footfalls on the stairs, punctuating by him whistling Moon River.

I could hear Sue come in and chat idly with Charlie.

I laid on my stomach across my bed, flipping through out school yearbooks. I looked at pictures of me where I looked socially awkward with braces and glasses. I'd gotten contacts when I entered college and the braces came off after three torturous years; but even with them gone it didn't cure my unease.

Charlie and Sue went into the backyard to sit on the porch-swing and I snuck downstairs to snag an ice-cream sandwich out of the freezer.

I was peeling the wrapper off when I heard someone knock on the door. I looked down at myself. I'd changed out of my skirt and blouse into an oversized Forks PD shirt and a pair of short shorts that said "heartbreaker" across the derrière.

I opened the door, ice-cream in hand, to find a petite woman with acid green eyes staring up at me.

"What did you do to Edward?" She demanded.

It took a few moments for it to dawn on me that she was referring to the Edward that I had spent the better part of the evening attempting to forget.

I closed the door right in her face.

She started to pound on it and I finally opened it, afraid that the noise would alarm Sue and my dad.

"What do you want?" I hissed at the petite, fearsome woman standing on my front step in a pair of dark skinny jeans and a top that looked like it cost more than my truck.

"I want to know why Edward isn't answering his cell phone and as far as I know is driving around Washington like a maniac with a death wish!" She said.

"What?" I screeched. I pulled her inside with my free hand and shut the door behind her.

"Geez, you don't have to break my arm," she muttered, stalking into the kitchen and plopping down unceremoniously into one of the chairs.

"Why are you here?" I asked her. I had no clue who she was. And then it dawned on me.

"You're Alice aren't you?" My voice wavered.

She nodded sharply, "And you're Bella. Now that we've got that out of the way, why don't you tell me what the heck happened!"

"Edward and I got into an argument, I figured that things wouldn't work between us, so I called my dad to come and get me," I said, taking a big bite of ice-cream.

She narrowed her eyes at me, "Edward was infatuated with you. I doubt he would give up that easily."

"He tried to apologize to me when I left the restaurant but my Dad wouldn't let him. He's a nice guy but I'm not ready for a relationship right now," I mumbled, studying the linoleum.

"He's a great guy, Bella. He just doesn't know when to shut-up," Alice remarked archly.

I sighed and sat opposite her at the table, "Alice, I like your brother, I know he's a great guy but that doesn't mean that I should be in a relationship with him."

"He's practically in love with you," she argued, slamming her hands against the tabletop.

My eyes widened and I sat up sharply, "What are you talking about?"

"I'm serious, I've never seen my brother so giddy over a girl before," Alice hissed at me. "He doesn't believe in love. He curses it every day of his life, and so he's scared—but Bella you could cure him of that!"

"How can I cure him of the same thing that ails me?" I whispered, mainly to myself.

Alice stared at me, confused, "What are you talking about?"

"Love is stupid and it makes people to irrational things, it's easily changed and swayed. Love is like the tide constantly moving and reshaping itself. People have no right to want to control it. People say they fall in love—well, they fall but it's just into mindless insanity," I told her, feeling bitter and betrayed.

"No wonder Edward liked you so much," Alice blew up, standing up from the table quickly and shoving her chair backwards so that it tipped and fell. "You're kindred spirits, both so cynical and stupid. I'll tell you what I've always told Edward. One day, Bella Swan, you're going to fall in love and then you'll eat your words."

I narrowed my eyes at her and showed her to the door.

She was just pulling out of the driveway when Sue and Charlie came into the house.

"We heard a lot of banging and yelling; is everything ok, Bella?" Sue asked, concern written plainly on her face.

I turned and leaned against the door.

"That was Edward's sister," I said quietly.

"Is everything ok?" Charlie asked, his police chief mode kicking in.

"Yeah, Dad," I lied, "everything's fine. She was just upset."

"Why was she upset?" Sue asked.

"She was just mad at me because I upset her brother. Everything's fine, don't worry about it," I said quietly and retreated up to my room.

I pried my floorboard open again and reread Edward's letter.

**Bella, happy belated birthday. I'm sorry that your special day didn't end well. I'm equally as sorry that it took me so long to return your book, truth be told I had no idea who you were until I saw you at the hospital. I hope you can forgive me for stealing this book for a week. **

**I wish you the best, Bella; I hope that despite having a rough start to a new year this year will bring you everything you want in life. My greatest hope for you is that you find happiness and love unlike the characters in this book. You deserve the best life can offer you. **

**Yours truly,**

**Edward Masen-Cullen**

"My greatest hope for you is that you find happiness and love…" I read out loud, trying to convince myself of the words. Nothing I did could make me think they were true.

I booted up my computer and slowly typed the words, 'Edward Masen-Cullen' into the search bar. There was really nothing on him other than a short biography on the hospital's webpage.

I slowly let my fingers type the next words, 'Renee Swan'.

There was a wedding announcement of a Renee Marie Swan to a Phillip Eric Dwyer three years ago in Pensacola, Florida. I pulled up the picture that went along with the announcement and I started to cry, she looked like me. Shorter hair and perhaps a little taller but she looked like me. And the man looked so happy. He was my step-father, if he even knew I existed. I closed the window and deleted the search and flopped onto my bed, tears still staining my cheeks.

She really did move on, didn't she? If she could forget about us, then I could most certainly forget about Edward. It would be easy.

A clean break.

* * *

**Worst date you've ever been on? I've only been on one date before, and it wasn't that bad. So I can't really answer this one.**


	15. Memories

**Chapter 15: Memories**

_"Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live."  
__-Norman Cousins_

_I sat in the backseat of the car, playing with a Slinky, letting it fall from the seat of the car onto the floor. Mommy reached around her seat and told me to sit up. _

_We were driving through this little town, and I was grumpy and hungry. _

_I wanted ice-cream and Daddy told me that that wasn't an option._

_"We're going to stop for burgers, you up for that, Buddy?" He asked._

_"No," I pouted, crossing my arms over my chest and kicking the Slinky across the floor._

_"Edward, you need to sit up and be polite, if not you won't get any dessert," Mommy scolded, turning in her seat to give me a threatening look._

_I straightened up and glared out the window._

_"C'mon Edward, moving is fun. It's an adventure," Daddy said from the front seat._

_I stared at him, "But I had friends back in Chicago! I had a girlfriend!"_

_Mommy tried not to laugh but she did. And that made me angrier. _

_"I didn't know you had a girlfriend," Daddy said, turning to look at me over his shoulder as he braked at a stoplight. _

_"Well I did," I said proudly._

_"What was her name?" Daddy asked._

_"Teddy, don't encourage him," Mommy said._

_"What, Liz, he's a strapping young lad, of course he'll have a girlfriend," Daddy said, grinning at Mommy._

_"What's her name, son?" Daddy asked again._

_"Kate," I mumbled staring out the window._

_"Now that's a nice name, was she pretty?" Daddy asked, turning down the radio so he could hear me._

_"Yes, she was real pretty," I mumbled._

_"I'm sorry you had to leave her behind, but there are other girls," Daddy said softly, reaching back and offering me his hand._

_I put my hand in his and he gave it a squeeze, "I promise, Edward. You'll love it here in Washington."_

_"But I don't have any friends here, Daddy!" I wailed, trying not to cry. Big boys didn't cry._

_"You'll make friends, Sweetie, I promise. I know it's sad to leave the old ones behind, but I promise you'll make friends." Daddy said._

_"Daddy, how much longer until we get to the new house?" I asked._

_"About another hour, Buddy. You hungry?" He asked._

_"Yup," I said with a grin._

_"Well then, we'll just have to get our growing boy some grub, now won't we, Lizzie?" Daddy asked Mommy._

_Mommy giggled and gave Daddy a kiss on the cheek, "Let's stop for something to eat."_

_Daddy pulled into a little greasy-looking hamburger joint and got out of the car. He stretched his back so that it would pop and then let me out of the backseat. He lifted me up so I was riding piggyback._

_"Lizzie, my dearest," he said to Mommy, "we manly men want some hamburgers what are you going to get?" _

_"I'm going to get some chicken fingers; I'll leave the burgers to you manly men." Mommy said and rolled her eyes at Daddy._

_He growled playfully at her and bent his head down to kiss her._

_"Oh, that's yucky," I told them, hiding my face in Daddy's neck._

_"I thought you had a girlfriend back in Chicago, and you think this is yucky?" Daddy asked, turning me around in his arms so that I was cradled to his chest._

_"It is yucky," I told him._

_He quirked an eyebrow at me and smiled crookedly he held me upside down by one ankle and started tickling me. _

_"No! Daddy stop," I giggled, wiggling around in his arms. "That tickles!"_

_"That's the point, son," Daddy laughed, still tickling me._

_"Teddy, you're going to make him throw up," Mommy giggled, as we walked towards the restaurant. We walked to the front counter and placed our orders. Daddy still held me, resting against his hip. I put my head on his shoulder and played with the zipper of his leather jacket._

_"You sleepy, bud?" Daddy asked, jostling me a little._

_"No," I told him._

_"Of course you're not," he said with a laugh._

_We got our hamburgers and Mommy's chicken and found a table. I sat on Daddy's lap as we ate. I was so sleepy the entire time; I only finished half of my burger._

_"You done, Edward?" Mommy asked._

_"I want ice-cream," I mumbled. Daddy laughed._

_"How about you and I get a hot-fudge sundae? That sound good to you, Buddy?" He asked._

_I nodded. He carried me back up to the counter where he ordered us a small ice cream sundae. Daddy ended up eating most of it, but I did take a bite or two, mainly of chocolate. _

_Mommy cleaned the chocolate on my cheeks up with a wet napkin._

_"Let's go, Teddy, I want to get to the house by nightfall," Mommy said quietly._

_I closed my eyes and rested my cheek against Daddy's chest. I could hear his heart beating, a slow and steady rhythm._

_"Is he asleep?" Mommy whispered._

_"I think so," Daddy said with a quiet laugh that made his chest rumble. I was too tired to tell them that I was still slightly awake. My eyelids were really heavy and I could feel myself being sucked into darkness._

_I felt him laying me down on the seat and resting my head against his leather jacket. It smelled like him. I snuggled into it._

_"Night, Sweetie," I heard him whisper as he and Mommy took turns kissing me goodnight._

_They closed their doors as quietly as they could and I drifted into a deeper sleep._

_"I can't believe we own our own house," Mommy whispered what felt like hours later. But I couldn't be sure how much time had passed._

_"It is rather exciting, isn't it my Lizzie."_

_"I love you," Mommy said softly._

_I peeked one eye open to watch them. They were holding hands over the center console of Daddy's Volvo. _

_"I love you too, Elizabeth Masen," he averred. _

_Daddy slowed the car down and started to drive one handed. He turned the radio to some corny love song and started to croon it to Mommy. She looked so in love. I closed my eyes and tried to go back to sleep._

_"Teddy, Edward's in the back seat," Mommy whispered harshly and then she giggled._

_I opened my eyes and Mommy was leaning across the car to kiss Daddy's cheek, the skin under his ear, his jaw, his neck. It was gross. Daddy turned to face Mommy and kissed her on the mouth._

_I was about to tell them that I was awake when Mommy screamed._

_I hit my head against the back of the seat and I could feel myself slip down to the floor. My legs and hips stayed glued to the seat because of the seatbelt and it hurt really badly. I clutched onto Daddy's jacket._

_I could smell smoke and something else metallic._

_I started to cry because my back hurt so bad. My legs felt like they were on fire. "Mommy," I sobbed, trying to get her attention._

_"Daddy!" I screamed trying to pull myself up on the seat._

_I could tell that Daddy was slumped against the dashboard, and Mommy's head was against the cracked window._

_He turned slowly and looked at me. He had blood on his mouth._

_"Are you hurt, Edward?" He asked, his voice was low and raspy like he had a bad cough._

_"My back hurts," I cried. _

_"Ok, Edward, everything's going to be ok," he said. "Edward, I love you. You know that right. Mommy and I love you very much."_

_"Yeah, Daddy, I love you, too," I said, crying and trying to get to Daddy._

_"Love you, Buddy," Daddy whispered. His eyes got really dark and stayed open, but he stopped breathing. I screamed until I lost my voice and soon everything got really dark and I was too sleepy to open my eyes again._

_The next time I woke up I was in a really little white bed and a tall man in a big white coat was standing next to me._

_"Hello, Edward," he said, he had a weird accent and I could barely understand him, "I'm Doctor Cullen."_

_"You talk funny," I told him._

_He chuckled and patted my hand, "How are you feeling?"_

_"My back hurts," I told him._

_"You have lacerations on your back, midsection and legs from where the seatbelt cut into you, we've had to give you some stitches," the Dr. Cullen said._

_"Where's Mommy?" I asked, I really wanted Mommy, she'd always kiss my boo-boo's._

_Dr. Cullen opened his mouth to respond and closed it again. "Your mother," he swallowed thickly, "Your mom was killed in the car accident."_

_My world started to spin and I let out a sob, "Where's Daddy? Daddy will tell me the truth! I want my Daddy!"_

_Dr. Cullen stared at me with sad blue eyes._

_"Daddy's gone, too, isn't he?" I asked. _

_Dr. Cullen nodded. I took in a shuddering breath and started to cry. I didn't stop crying for several hours. I felt spent and my cheeks and the collar of my hospital gown was soaking wet._

_A very pretty lady walked into the room, followed by Dr. Cullen._

_"Edward, this is my wife, Esme, she's here to talk to you," Dr. Cullen said._

_Esme came and sat on the bed beside me._

_"You don't have a funny accent too, do you?" I asked._

_Esme giggled, "No. Carlisle's from England, that's why he talks funny."_

_I nodded._

_"Edward, I have a very special thing to ask of you," Esme said quietly. She wrapped her arms around me and held me against her. She smelled like my Mommy._

_"What is it?" I asked._

_"I have a little girl at home, she's almost two years old and she's in need of a big brother, do you think you could come live with Carlisle and I and be Alice's big brother?" Esme asked, smoothing my hair away from my face._

_"What about my Mommy and Daddy? I'm not allowed to go with strangers," I told Esme._

_"I know, sweetheart. But your Mommy and Daddy would want you to have a good home, and Carlisle and I can give that to you," Esme said softly._

_Dr. Cullen walked in as Esme finished her statement, holding a round little girl who had thick dark curls all over her head._

_"Edward, this is Alice," Carlisle told me; he set the baby on the bed next to me._

_"Hi," Alice said shyly, leaning towards her Daddy and away from me._

_"Hello," I said back, leaning towards Esme._

_"Ed," she said pointing to me, and then giggling._

_I smiled at her. She really was cute. "Esme, can I come home with you?"_

_"Of course Edward, we love you, Sweetheart."_

I woke up, stiff and groggy and my forehead sore from being pressed against the steering wheel. It was 6:43 in the morning, and I was still tired. I didn't recall pulling over to the shoulder but I was thankful I did.

My gas tank was empty and I groaned. I grabbed my keys out of the ignition and started the long walk home.

* * *

**I cried writing this.**

**Ok. I'm so so sorry that this was late. I'm going to launch into my tale of why exactly this was late, so if you don't care don't read it. Skip down to the question and then review. But if you would like to know, here it is: Friday I couldn't get on the Internet until around 1:30/2-ish because I had to tutor some little kids. So when I finally got on I came right to FanFiction, and then lo and behold I couldn't sign in. I figured it was because I was at school and something was wrong with the wireless Internet. Whatever, I could deal with that. So when I got home I signed on via dial-up, and it let me sign in just fine. Ok, I thought, the chapter will just be a little late. WRONG. I tried to upload my document...once...twice...ten times. Seriously, it wouldn't upload. It still won't upload. I actually had to go back and edit an old chapter to be this chapter. So this is actually Chapter 10 that I deleted all of the words off of and then copy/pasted Chapter 15 into. Hopefully whatever's wrong with FF Dot Net gets fixed, because I'm rather pissed off that I can't upload stuff. Grr.**

**Did you cry? I did.**


	16. Romance Movies

**Chapter 16: Romance Movies**

"_You write the most beautiful things. Do you actually believe in love and marriage and just pretend to be a cynic or are you actually a cynic who knows how to spin romantic crap for girls like me?"  
__-from "27 Dresses"_

It had officially been a month and a half since my failed date with Edward. I had avoided him like the plague. When Leah tried interrogating me about our date I'd given her the finger and walked away.

Seth thought it was funny, but Leah was upset. She told me that Edward had been moping for weeks after our foul date and that I should go to the hospital and cheer him up. Yeah right.

It would be a lie to say that I wasn't miserable. As if I didn't have a life before the whole Edward debacle, I was practically a zombie after.

Charlie and Sue got cozier as the weeks rolled on and Leah and I constantly joked that a wedding would be on the horizon. Despite my original protests to Charlie's newly minted relationship, it would've been pretty nice to see him settled down and happy. I still had yet to tell him about what I'd found out about Renee.

By mid-October Seth was starting to think my perpetual state of zombie-ness was kind of unsettling.

"Bells, I have a basketball game tomorrow night you wanna come along?" Seth asked, unleashing his puppy-dog eyes on me.

I'd found over the months that Charlie had been dating Sue, that Seth could pursued anyone to do anything, no matter who they are or what the task was.

It was an infuriating talent, one that Leah and I cursed to the fiery pits of hell.

"So you'll come won't you?" Seth asked, "You can't mope around here forever."

"I'm not moping," I said, kicking him in the back. Leah, Seth and I were sprawled out on Charlie's ratty, old sofa watching 27 Dresses—Leah's choice for our 'movie/bonding night'—and Charlie and Sue were out to dinner.

"Yes you are," Seth said, throwing popcorn in my hair.

"You don't understand," I muttered.

"Shut up you two, James Marsden is about to start making out with her," Leah said, putting her finger to her lips and shushing us.

"Are they romping in her dad's car?" Seth asked, appalled.

"Shut up," Leah and I said at the same time. We watched the rest of the movie in relative silence until it came to the scene with Katherine Heigl on the boat confessing her love to James Marsden and then both Leah and I cried a little.

Not really because it was such a sappy, happy, trippy ending but because we were both really insanely jealous and because James Marsden was hot, with those pretty sparkly eyes and the mused hair and the crooked smile.

Oh Lord, I was a goner.

I got up from the couch and went to make another bag of kettle corn in the microwave.

Seth trotted after me.

"So," he said, leaning against the sink, "Charlie's coming to my game, why don't you?"

"I've never been to a basketball game before," I said with a shrug.

"Didn't you go when you were in high school?" Seth asked.

"Do I look like the sporty type to you?" I asked, listening to the 'pop, pop, pop' of the kettle corn in the microwave.

"Not really, but didn't you have friends that went?" He asked, fishing around in the fridge for cream soda.

"Do I look like the type to have friend to you?" I asked again.

"Yes," Seth said quite seriously.

I gave him a disparaging look and rolled my eyes, "Well I didn't."

"Ok, let's relive your high school years; you're going to the game. Leah's going, Mom's going your Dad's going, so you should go." Seth, once again, looked at me with those imploring black eyes and I couldn't say no.

"Fine, I'll go," I mumbled, snagging the bag of popcorn out the microwave and dumping it into a plastic Tupperware bowl.

Seth pumped his fist into the air a couple of times and then did a victory lap of the kitchen. I had no idea why he was so excited, and I really didn't want to find out. He was probably up to no good.

I went back to the living room where Leah was flipping through several more DVD cases.

"What should we watch next?" She asked.

"More romance," I said my mouth full of popcorn.

"Just shoot me now," Seth said, flopping down in Charlie's recliner.

As far as Friday nights go, ours was pretty tame. Most twenty-one-year-olds would be out drinking until they couldn't walk straight and they thought two plus two was eighteen. But no, I stayed home with my almost-siblings and watched Pride and Prejudice. Leah and I did share a beer, because we didn't think Charlie would notice if one of his Coronas was gone and we didn't want to be utterly pathetic.

We got about an hour into the movie before Seth got up to go run laps around the house and leave Leah and I to swoon over Mr. Darcy and his sexy English accent.

"So he convinced you to go tomorrow night?" Leah asked when it was to a part with Wickham doing something dastardly.

"Yeah," I muttered.

"It's not as bad as you think it will be; it's actually kind of exciting. Seth's a good player," she told me. She sounded so proud of him.

I shrugged and smiled, "I've never been to a basketball game before, so I guess it should be kind of cool."

Leah nodded and soon we were both enthralled with the movie.

We awoke the next morning to Charlie banging around the kitchen. It had become a common occurrence for one of the Clearwater's to be left at our house when we had movie nights. We all tended to fall asleep at embarrassingly early hours and we were all heavy sleepers, so someone generally got left behind. This time it was Leah.

Charlie made us coffee and cheesy scrambled eggs—because that's all he knows how to cook—and then left for work.

Seth was picking Leah up to take her to work and so I had the morning to myself without having to worry about taking Leah to work and accidentally bumping into Edward. I had successfully avoided him for the last couple of months and I fully intended on avoiding him until the day that I died.

I spent the rest of the day ridiculously nervous about going to the high school basketball game.

What does one wear to a basketball game?

I finally settled on jeans and one of my nicer blouses. At least I didn't look ridiculous.

I took a nice long, hot shower and blow-dried my hair. It stuck out like a frizzy lion's mane so I French-braided it down my back.

The game was at four in the afternoon but Seth said I could come a little earlier to watch them practice beforehand. Charlie went out at around 3:30, so I just rode with him in the cruiser.

Despite years and years of riding around Forks in the cruiser it still embarrassed to no end.

Once when I'd acted out in middle school Charlie made me ride in the back for a week, behind the metal caging, staring out through the bullet-proof glass windows. The memory of that week still made me cringe.

We got to Forks High and I suddenly was hit with a wave of nostalgia.

I remembered years of hiding in the references section of the library so that the catty girls didn't find me, and my years of looking forward to English class, and then the countless hours spent crying in the bathroom. Alone.

"You look like you've seen a ghost, Bells," Dad said.

Maybe I had. I saw the ghost of my past standing in the double doors to the high school, staring at me with wanton, empty eyes and wondering why I hadn't gotten better with age.

I sighed and pushed forward, towards the gym.

I had really awful memories in that gym. Like breaking Mike Newton's nose with a badminton racket, and then getting a broken nose myself playing volleyball. Breaking my wrist attempting to play dodgeball. The list was endless.

The gym was bigger than I remembered, it smelled worse, too.

There were a couple rowdy kids littering the bleachers as I followed my father into the gym.

Seth was by far the tallest boy on the team. He towered over most of his teammates. Some of them came up to his eyebrows but whenever I got lost with the action on the court, I could just spot his familiar mop of dark hair and figure out what he was doing.

Charlie helped me climb up to the middle of the wooden bleachers, far away from the teenagers with foam-fingers and pompoms. God, I hoped there weren't cheerleaders. Nothing worse than cheerleaders.

Leah and Sue came in and sat with us. Leah gave me the 411 on the team, who was good, who was a player—on and off the court—and so on and so forth.

I found myself captivated by the game. Seth was a good point guard, as far as I could tell. He worried me a little, because he would dive across the court and sacrifice himself to keep the ball in play.

His bad knee was wrapped tightly in an Ace bandage.

"Is his knee ok?" I whispered in Leah's ear.

"Yeah, he had a doctor's appointment about it, so I think it should be fine," Leah whispered back.

I nodded and continued to watch him play.

I had a strange feeling for the majority of the first quarter, something stirred in my belly and I didn't quite understand why. I soon found out.

* * *

**So, a little bit of a more lighthearted chapter after the sob-fest that was Chapter 15. Seth's basketball playing style [i.e. diving across the court--heedless of his own wellbeing] is based off of a couple of my guy friends...I have some friends that have torn tendons, gotten really bad sprains, bled, ect. playing basketball.**

**What's your favourite romantic movie? Pride and Prejudice or Memoirs of a Geisha.**


	17. For the Love of the Game

**Chapter 17: For the Love of the Game**

"_It's what you get from the games that you lose that is extremely important."  
__-Pat Riley_

I had a follow-up appointment with Seth Clearwater on Friday morning. I liked Seth, he was a good kid. And I figured, unlike Leah, he wasn't going to give me some kind of crap about Bella Swan.

The morning after my date with Bella, I had driven home to have Alice breathing down my neck about getting back together with Bella. I thought at work things would be better. They weren't. I had Leah breathing down my neck because Charlie was breathing down her neck.

So we had a lot of people breathing down each other's necks, and it wasn't going to do any good because me and Bella getting back together was sure to be one of the signs of the Apocalypse.

I checked on Benjamin in the morning, and then made my way to one of the exam rooms to find Seth already waiting for me. He was poking around the tongue depressors and cotton swabs.

"You touch that and I can't use them," I said, jabbing my pen at him.

"Sorry, Doc," he said with a grin.

I really liked Seth. Even though I was terrified he was going to bring up Bella, I still liked him.

"Hop up on the table," I said, patting my hand against the sheet of white paper.

"Ok," Seth said happily, vaulting up onto the table.

"Roll up your pant leg," I instructed, glancing over his chart.

He rolled up the leg of his jeans and stuck his knee out to me. "Have you been having any pain since you dislocated it?"

He shook his head as I pressed around his kneecap. It was a little swollen for my liking.

"Have you been wrapping it properly whenever you perform physical activity? It feels a bit swollen," I noted, raising an eyebrow at him.

He grinned at me sheepishly and scratched the back of his neck, "Not really. Leah's been after me about that, too."

"Well, I'll wrap it for you today, but have Leah teach you how to do it," I said, looking at him sternly.

"Yes sir," he said, giving me a small, mock salute. I rolled my eyes.

"So what's the diagnosis, Doc?" He asked after I'd wrapped his knee nice and tight.

"You're good to go, kid. Just take it easy. You can play ball, just be smart about it." I told him.

"How about you come see me play—admire your handiwork," he grinned.

"I've actually been meaning to go to one of your games; I'm good friends with your coach. When's your game?" I asked. It would be nice to see him play; I'd only heard good things about him. Supposedly he had a lot of talent.

"Tonight at four," he said, "You know Coach McCarty?"

"Yeah, I've known him since college."

"That's cool, I didn't know that," he said, rolling his pants leg back down and putting back on his shoe. He had those slip-on Vans. His were drawn all over, looked like a girl's handwriting. The kid was probably a flirt.

I nodded, "So is your game at the high school?"

"Yeah we're playing the public school from Sappho."

"I'll try to be there," I told him with a nod.

He smiled and shook my hand and went on his way.

I checked on the other patients around the ward, ate some Cheetos from the vending machine, and avoided talking to Leah. I called Alice around three to let her know that I was going to Seth's game and that I planned on eating there so she should tell mother that I wouldn't be home for meatloaf night.

I arrived a little late to Seth's game because a child with a bad case of the flu had been vomiting all over everything—me included—so I had to take a shower before I left the hospital.

I attended a private school in Port Angeles for the majority of my schooling, so I'd never been to Forks' gym. The school was tiny, but extremely hard to navigate. I finally found the entrance and drove around the parking lot for several minutes before I found the actual gym building.

I walked in at the end of the first quarter, and Forks High was up by seven points. Seth shone on the court; he was overwhelmingly brilliant at playing. He was an excellent ball-handler and extremely accurate at shooting. I wouldn't be surprised if he received a scholarship to play ball in college.

After the first quarter they went into a team huddle and Seth stuck his head out to scan the crowd he saw someone and smiled—his girlfriend, I thought—and then waved at me. His head ducked back down as he discussed something with his team.

Emmett looked around to see who Seth was waving to and rolled his eyes. I would've given him the finger had we not been in a room full of teenagers and their parents.

Instead, I looked over to see who Seth had smiled at. And it most certainly wasn't his girlfriend.

Bella Swan.

That conniving little brat had brought us to the same basketball game. I had to laugh at the absurdity of the situation.

I sat as far away from Bella as I could. I was going to have to have a talk with Seth about meddling in other people's lives. He would get along great with Alice.

Bella Swan had noticed Seth's obnoxious little wave and was scanning the crowd, her eyes finally found me and she glared with all of her might.

"If looks could kill," I muttered under my breath.

I really didn't mean to hurt her, it had just sort of happened. I mean, I was a little naïve to think that I really loved someone I didn't know. Maybe I was in love with the thought of Bella. Thinking that maybe she could change things, but she couldn't.

Suddenly there was a great hubbub on the court. Several people gasped and yelled out a little.

My head snapped up as Seth rolled around on the floor clutching his knee. The rest of the players were hanging back apprehensively.

"Couch!" One of the younger players called nervously when Seth didn't get up, he laid on the floor in the fetal position a steady string of curses coming from his lips.

Emmett and I ran onto the court at the same time Leah made a break from the bleachers, I briefly caught a glimpse of Bella standing up from her seat, her hands pressed to her mouth.

"Hey, you two can't be on the court," the ref yelled at us.

"I'm his doctor," I said, bending over a panting Seth. Emmett looked at me gratefully.

"And I'm his sister, and a nurse," Leah said, she cradled Seth's head in her lap as I poked and prodded Seth's knee.

It looked slightly purple around the kneecap but it wasn't dislocated, it was swelling quickly, though.

"Tell Edward where it hurts, Kid" Emmett said gruffly, trying to get Seth to stop moving around.

"Jesus, it's all over my knee," Seth said between clenched teeth.

I slowly unwound the last of the bandage I had put on earlier. "Your kneecap is still in place, I think you just twisted it really badly. Can we get some ice?"

"Hey, someone get one of the icepacks," Emmett called over his shoulder to his team.

The same kid that had called Emmett before scampered off to get the icepack he returned and handed it to Emmett, "Thanks Colin."

"No problem, Coach," Colin replied looking at Seth nervously.

"Go sit down, Colin, and stop looking at me like that," Seth said peevishly. He turned to me, "Can I still play?"

"What do you think Seth?" I asked sarcastically.

"Once we ice it, it'll be ok," he said, wincing as he sat up.

"Once I get you in for and MRI it'll be ok," I retorted, putting his arm over my shoulder as Emmett did the same on his other side. We helped him limp off the court to the bench as the crowd in the gym cheered for him.

"This sucks, I get more cheers for twisting my knee than I do for a good play," he said as Leah positioned the icepack over his swelling joint.

Emmett burst out laughing, "Sorry, Kid."

Seth shook his head, "At least you got to see me play for a little bit, eh Doc?" He asked.

"And you were good, but you'll be better once you give this knee some time to heal," I said.

He nodded.

Leah glared at him and then slapped the back of his head, "We'll make sure that he stays off it a couple of days."

"Thanks, Leah," I laughed. "Take it easy, Seth. Don't worry about the game your teammates can take over for you."

"Edward's right, Seth, we've got it handled. Don't beat yourself up about it," Emmett said.

Seth sighed and the ref blew his whistle, signaling that Leah and I should haul butt off the court so they could resume the game.

Leah went back to sitting with her mother, Bella and Chief Swan. I decided to leave. But Sue Clearwater grabbed my sleeve.

"Thank you for all of your help, Dr. Masen-Cullen," she said.

I smiled at her and nodded, "Seth's a good kid; he just needs to take better care of that knee. He'll be fine in no time."

Sue shook my hand and nodded, she motioned for Charlie to do the same. He thanked me in the most insincere way possible and then crushed all the bones in my hand when he shook it.

I got the picture, 'thanks for taking care of my almost-son, but still stay the heck away from my daughter'.

He didn't need to tell me twice.

* * *

**So, everyone guessed right. Edward showed up at the game. Was it that predictable? :P**

**I can feel Seth's pain. I have a bad knee because I've messed it up from so many years of dancing. I've had to have an MRI for it and everything…have to keep it wrapped and stuff when I do really hard physical activity. **

**Favourite memory from a sporting event in high school? I don't have one in particular. My sister had two aces in a row yesterday in volleyball, though. Hooray!**


	18. The Hodgepodge Family

**Chapter 18: The Hodgepodge Family**

"_The family. We were a strange little band of characters trudging through life sharing diseases and toothpaste, coveting one another's desserts, hiding shampoo, borrowing money, locking each other out of our rooms, inflicting pain and kissing to heal it in the same instant, loving, laughing, defending, and trying to figure out the common thread that bound us all together."  
__-Erma Bombeck_

Seth rode to our house in the back of the cruiser so he could stretch his leg all the way out. It was much more spacious in the back seat of the cruiser than it was in Sue's Accord.

"So it was nice to see Doctor Masen-Cullen there," I said in a faux-happy voice, looking at Seth through the thick screen between the front of the cab and the back.

"Yeah, what a nice coincidence," Seth said innocently.

"Uh-huh," I nodded, still suspicious of him.

The moment I'd laid eyes on Edward I'd wondered why he was there and then it hit me when Seth waved to him. That little traitor had invited Edward. Seth had better have been glad he was already injured because I wanted to injure him myself.

Charlie seemed completely oblivious. I wondered how he thought Edward had ended up at the basketball game. It was not just a coincidence.

When we got back to the house, Charlie helped Seth limp to the couch where they turned on ESPN. I found Leah and Sue in the kitchen.

"I'm going to kill Seth," I growled.

"Why?" Leah asked, prying the peel off an orange and handing me a slice.

"Because, he invited Edward to the game!" I said, sucking on the orange.

"Oh, yeah, I kind of figured you'd be upset about that," she said sagely.

"Whatever did happen between you and Edward?" Sue asked, sitting down at the table.

"He's far too observant," I mumbled, stealing another piece of the orange.

Sue sighed, "You know, I broke up with my first husband four times before he finally proposed to me."

Leah's head snapped around to stare at Sue, "I didn't know that."

Sue shrugged, "I never mentioned it. Harry was sweet, but a little strange. He liked to go fishing for days on end and he always forgot to call. I got fed up with it and broke up with him several times, the last time he showed up on my doorstep with a ring."

"But at least you still loved him," I mumbled. "With Edward, it's different. I admire him, he's a nice young man but I can't love him."

"Can't?" Leah asked.

"I'm not physically capable of love," I said.

"What, did you have your heart removed at a young age?" Leah seethed, "Humans make mistakes. Whatever Edward said or did was a mistake and you're mistaken if you think one sour date is going to ruin a relationship."

I stared at her, my mouth slack, "I don't want a relationship with him! I can't do it."

"Why can't you?!" She demanded.

"Because, I don't know how!" I fumed, "I grew up with Charlie being both Mommy and Daddy, I didn't know what it looked like to date until I got to high school, and even that's all screwed up! I didn't have friends in high school because I was ostracized because I wouldn't date! The one time I went to a dance with a boy he tried to force himself on me. So I'm sorry if I have an unhealthy fear of relationships and commitment, but I do!"

I had to take a deep breath to calm myself. I was fairly sure my face was a shade of red that it had never been before. I felt light headed and dizzy.

"I'm so sorry, Bella, I'm sorry I didn't teach you how to be in a healthy relationship," Charlie said quietly from the doorway.

"No, Dad, it's not your fault," I said quietly. "I'm just a loser." I ran up the stairs and slammed the door to my room.

I flopped across my bed and turned my computer on again.

I searched for Renee Dwyer and reread the article about her marriage.

How had she found happiness when she had left behind such a mess? How could she deserve it?

I went to Facebook and did the unthinkable. I found her. My mouse hovered over the Add Friend link. I didn't want to be her friend. She'd betrayed me, but wouldn't she at least want to know me?

If I were in her position I would want to know my daughter.

I closed the window and shut the computer down.

"Dad?" I called.

"Yeah?" He asked after a few minutes, sticking his head around my doorjamb.

"If you could find out what Mom was doing right now, would you?"

All of the blood drained out of Charlie's face. "No, Bella. I wouldn't."

"Why not?" I asked, close to tears. "You loved her, didn't you?"

"Yes, Bella, I did. But she doesn't love me anymore, she's married and happy," he said softly.

"How do you know she's married?" I demanded.

"I got the wedding announcement and a letter in the mail," he said softly. "I didn't want to tell you about it. Didn't want you to suffer because of our mistakes. Bella, your mother was seventeen when she had you, she was young and we were stupid. We had a shotgun wedding when she got pregnant. I thought your grandfather was going to kill me.

"We fought all the time, Bella. We weren't compatible with each other. We made a mistake, Bells. It wasn't your fault. I fell in love with you the moment I saw you, and nothing your mother did or could do will change that. I'm sorry that you've had to suffer because of the mistakes she's made."

I sighed.

"Bella, you are not your mother and you're not me. You can have a successful, healthy relationship. You're not us."

I started to cry. And then there were very feminine hands smoothing my hair away from my face. I opened my eyes to find that Sue and Leah had come into my room. Sue held me while I cried myself out.

Leah stroked my hair.

I figured by the way they were saying similarly soothing things to Charlie, that they'd heard our entire conversation. I wanted to know how much Sue knew about Charlie and Renee's relationship.

She probably knew more than I did. And I was ok with that. I didn't want to know anymore details than I already did. I hadn't known how young Renee was when I was born until that evening.

I did want a mother, but at that moment I realized that I had one. I had a father, a mother, an older sister and a little brother.

We weren't exactly the Henry Fonda and Lucille Ball version of Yours, Mine and Ours, but we were ok.

Sue and crew left well past midnight. After we'd all snuggled on the couch for a bit.

It would've been embarrassing to be a grown woman cuddled in the living room with my other grown almost-siblings, but it wasn't. It was comfortable, and I kind of didn't want it to end.

After everything was said and done I lay in my bed and thought about Charlie. About the years he'd spent putting my hair up into pigtails, and shopping with me for prom dresses that I always ended up crying and eating ice cream in, instead of dancing and flirting.

Charlie had been the one to buy me tampons over all of the years; he got me my first, and only, car. He was always there.

Now, I wanted to tell him something. I wanted to let him know that I was going to be alright.

I knocked on his door around two o'clock in the morning.

He grunted, so I took that as a cue that I could enter.

He sat up in bed and rubbed his eyes. "You ok, Bells?"

"Yeah, can I talk to you, Dad?" I asked, plodding forward to sit on the corner of his bed. His room hadn't changed in twenty-one years. He still had the same ratty, plaid comforter and the same knickknacks on his dresser. Pictures of me as a baby and an old jewelry box that was my grandmother's.

"Sure thing," he said.

"I want you to marry Sue."

He was instantly awake. "What?"

"I said, 'I want you to marry Sue'." I told him evenly.

Charlie looked at me quizzically, "You actually want me to get married?"

"You've thought about it, haven't you?" I challenged.

"Well, yes, but—"

"No, no buts about it, Padre. If you love her, you should marry her. I want you to marry her," I said with as much conviction as I could muster.

"And you'd be ok with that?" He asked skeptically.

"What part of the sentence of 'I want you to marry her' doesn't make sense?" I teased.

"I guess, I'm just surprised," he said quietly, broodingly.

"Dad, I want you to be happy." I said quietly.

He leaned forward and hugged me.

"I want you to be happy, too." He said softly, running his hands over my hair.

I didn't say something corny like 'I am happy' or 'I will be'. I just stayed there for a moment before pulling away.

I stalked softly to Charlie's door.

"I think you should give Edward a second chance," Charlie whispered so lowly that I almost couldn't hear.

"I think so, too."

* * *

**There are some people who are upset that Bella and Edward STILL aren't together. THEY WILL BE SOON. I promise. Bear with me!**

**Would you give Edward a second chance? I might...don't really know.**


	19. I'm Not Alright

**Chapter 19: I'm Not Alright**

"_And I am not immune.  
__I only want to be loved; but I feel safe behind the firewall.  
__Can I lose my need to impress if you want the truth I need to confess.  
__I'm not alright, I'm broken inside.  
__And all I go through leads me to you."  
__-"I'm Not Alright" by Sanctus Real_

A week after the basketball game and I had successfully filled my head with enough medical crap to push all thoughts of Bella Swan aside. My thoughts were consumed by the size of a child's aorta, white blood cell counts and pleurisy.

And the position in Italy.

Aro had called both the house phone and the hospital to give me new information about the possibility of my moving to Volterra.

Alice had begged me, on more than one occasion, not to go. Carlisle was supportive of whatever decision I made and I had no idea how Esme felt because she wouldn't tell me.

Emmett called Friday morning and told me that I was eating dinner at his and Rose's house, whether I liked it or not.

I didn't argue because I really did miss Emmett and I knew he could probably kill me if I refused.

So Friday night at seven o'clock I drove to the McCarty's house. Emmett had the grill set up in the front yard and Rosalie was bringing out steaks. My mouth watered.

"Edward!" Emmett exclaimed, tossing his tongs to the side and jogging to embrace me. He picked me up a little and patted his big hands on my back. One thing I'd found out about Emmett over the years was that he had no concept of personal space.

"Hey Em," I said, forcing a smile.

"Jesus, man, you're pale. Ever heard of the daylight, it's this hot new thing where you stand out in the sun—you know that big yellow ball in the sky?"

"Yeah, I've just been inside a lot," I said sheepishly.

"And you haven't been sleeping either—I haven't seen those dark circles under your eyes since you started med school." Emmett said.

"Yeah, I haven't been getting much sleep either, I've been really busy," I told him with a shrug of the shoulders.

"Edward's here!" Rosalie called happily.

I smiled at her as she held the screen door open and a little blonde haired toddler walked out. "Oh my God, he's gotten so big!"

Emmett scooped the little boy up, "Yeah, you would know that if you actually showed up when we invite you over, Uncle Edward."

"Hey Pete," I said, tickling him under his chin.

He giggled and then hid his face into the crook between Emmett's shoulder and neck. He was a little big for being only 16 months old, but with Emmett for a father I was pretty sure that was to be expected. And he was the spitting image of his dad. He had Rose's blonde hair but there the resemblance ended, everything else was pure Emmett.

"You gonna say 'hello' to Uncle Edward, Peter?" Emmett asked, taking the little boy's hand between two of his fingers.

Peter shook his head and laughed a little more.

I smiled at him. I knew most children went through a shy phase and it was understandable that Peter would be shy around me, he didn't really know me. I was never around.

Emmett grilled our steaks as I helped Rosalie make baked potatoes.

"So how have you been, Edward?" Rose asked.

I knew in Rose-language that meant 'how have you been since your temper tantrum a couple of months ago'.

"You know Rosalie," I said quietly, "if you really wanted to know what's been going on you could've just asked Alice."

"I did," she quipped.

"And what did my dearest sister have to say about my life?" I asked through clenched teeth.

"She said that she thinks you're being idiotic to have given up so easily on this Bella person," Rose said with a shrug.

"And do you agree with her?"

"I only know Alice's side of the story, and though her facts are usually correct she's usually rather biased—in this case it's against you, so I'm not going to judge anything until I know what's going on inside your head," Rosalie said.

"You'll probably agree with Alice about it, even after you hear my side of things," I told her.

"I probably will," she replied with a shrug, "but at least this one you can't be upset with me for not choosing your side."

I frowned at her but knew it was true. "The simple truth is: Bella Swan is a lovely young woman. She'd make any young man very happy. But I don't want a relationship with anyone. I do not want it here or there," I started to quote with a smile, "I do not want it anywhere. I do not want a green eggs and ham, I do not want them Sam I Am."

Rosalie rolled her eyes.

"I would've substituted 'a relationship' for 'green eggs and ham' but then it wouldn't have rhymed, but you get the picture." I said with a grin.

"Why do you not want a relationship?" Rosalie asked and then added as an afterthought, "I can understand the green eggs and ham, but boycotting love seems a little ridiculous to me."

"I don't have time for one," I lied. No one knew about my insecurities about my parents, or my disbelief that anything good could come of love.

I hadn't even told Emmett about my parent's death. He knew I was adopted by Esme and Carlisle and he knew my parents were dead—but he didn't know I'd watched my father die. Or that the scars I had on my back and stomach were from the accident that had killed them.

"Yeah right," Rosalie scoffed.

"I'm very busy," I said offended. Busy at the hospital, and then busy listening to my vast collection of music and reading, busy sleeping, busy wallowing in self-pity, busy not thinking about Bella Swan.

I was very busy indeed.

"You're not busy, Edward. You're just avoiding everything in your life that could possibly make you happy. That's why you never come over here even though Emmett misses you. That's why you ruined the one good date you've been on in years."

The truth of Rosalie's words stung a little bit.

"Soup's on," Emmett called, sticking his head through the door.

We ate on their front porch, balancing paper plates and Dixie cups in our laps as we at our steak, baked potatoes and green beans. Peter was stuffing handfuls of beans into his mouth, mumbling to himself.

I was fairly sure Emmett had taught him to do that.

"So," I said, stirring my fork around inside my baked potato, "I was offered a position as the head of the pediatric cardiology department."

"Wow, I didn't know Forks had a pediatric cardiology department," Rosalie said, sounding impressed and surprised. Emmett's eyes snapped up to meet mine, but he didn't say anything.

"It doesn't," I said, staring into my green beans.

"Where would you be going?" Emmett asked, sounding emotionless and very un-Emmett-like.

"Volterra," I said.

"Where the he—"

"Language, Emmett," Rosalie said, shooting a look at Peter.

"I was gonna say heck, Rosie. Anyways, were the heck is Volterra?"

"Italy," I mumbled.

"As in the Italy in Europe?" Emmett asked.

"What other Italy is there?" Rosalie snapped, glaring at me. "So you're just going to run away?"

"What?!" I demanded. "What am I running away from, Rosalie. Please, enlighten me."

"You're running away from Bella," Emmett answered.

"I thought you were on my side?" I asked him, glaring.

"No, I'm not on anyone's side. I generally agree with you; but not on this, Edward. You've screwed things up and I think you should fix them."

"I'm not fixing anything. Our relationship—or lack thereof—was bound to fail regardless of my actions on the first date," I said evenly.

"Yeah right," Emmett scoffed.

I scowled at him, "It wasn't going anywhere."

"And you could tell that for the fifteen minutes you were on a date with her?" He asked. "She's a nice girl; I think you made a wrong assumption about her."

"How do you know she's a nice girl?"

"Seth told me," Emmett said. "He's always talking about his sisters."

"Bella isn't his sister," I said, shaking my head.

"She might as well be. Seth cares about her as much as he cares about Leah; and he's rather upset that you didn't even give her a chance."

"I did give her a chance; she's the one who called her cop daddy to come pick her up from our date!" I exploded.

"Well, what'd you say to her?" Emmett demanded, unfazed by my outburst.

"She feels like she's worthless, I can't be with someone like that," I growled.

"So you just dumped a girl with a low self-esteem?" Rosalie asked. Her eyebrows were drawn in narrow, angry lines over her violet eyes. I glared right back at her.

And then, it hit me. I had dumped her when maybe all she needed was someone to hold her and tell her that she wasn't worthless. But wasn't that what I'd said? Hadn't I told her she was stupid to believe that?

Maybe I could've been more understanding and not have demanded answers from her. But I didn't know how to be in a relationship. What did she expect from me?

And what did I expect from her?

Love wasn't all happy endings and running through fields of flowers. It was messy and dirty and broken.

* * *

**This is one of the LAST emo chapters. I promise. After this they start getting forced together again. But we had to see the fact that Edward is backsliding whereas Bella is making progress. Edward's unwillingness to love will make sense in coming chapter. I swear it will. So just bear with me. This story has about 10 more chapters.**

**Whose side are you on? I'd probably be on Bella's side...**


	20. Sister Knows Best

**Chapter 20: Sister Knows Best**

"_More than Santa Claus, your sister knows when you've been bad and good."  
__-Linda Sunshine_

I walked with Charlie, trying to be sneaky, to the antique store downtown. It was a rather large old building. Charlie had bought my copy of Wuthering Heights there, and he was convinced he could find a ring there.

I'd gone with him more for moral support because I didn't know what to look for in an engagement ring.

It was rather bizarre, though. I was going engagement ring shopping with my daddy. But there was no where else I would rather be.

Charlie had already talked to Leah and Seth about asking Sue that very important question and they'd both agreed unanimously that Charlie should ask her.

"Oh my God, I can't believe I'm doing this," he mumbled when we went into the antique store. We had decided on the antique store mainly because Charlie had admitted that he was uncomfortable with jewelry stores so we had to get creative with finding somewhere else besides Jared or Zales or Kay or whatever else to find a ring.

He'd mentioned seeing a jewelry section at the antique shop, so that was our first stop.

"Welcome to Brandon's Antiques, I'll be with you in a second," a voice called out when our entrance rang the bell above the door.

I pulled Charlie over to one of the large, glass display cases and told him to look for something. I went over to another case that mainly had bracelets and necklaces but a few rings.

I could hear Charlie asking the saleswoman if she had any diamonds—a request I'm sure she wasn't used to getting.

I turned around to try to explain the situation a little, but my mouth snapped shut when her eyes met mine.

Alice Cullen.

Her eyes snapped up to meet mine and we both stared at each other for a couple seconds. Charlie's gaze went between the two of us.

"Do you two know each other?" He asked.

I said "no" at the same time Alice said "yes". We both glared.

Alice's gaze faltered first and she turned her attention back to Charlie—her face the perfect mask of a polite, detached employee. She unhooked a key ring from one of her belt loops and unlocked one of the large, glass cases. She brought out a little square of padded velvet with rings sunk into the divots.

She rattled off the carats and metals and cuts of several different rings, holding them up for Charlie's inspection. I wandered over to a dark corner of the antique shop so I could avoid Edward's sister.

"Bells, come help me look at these," my dad called across the store.

I sighed and walked back over to him, tripping over a lumpy rug and catching myself against an oak vanity table.

"You ok, Bella?"

"Yeah I'm fine," I said, righting myself. I dusted off my hands and picked my way carefully back to Charlie. He and Alice were watching me warily.

"You break it you buy it," Alice said smarmily.

I glared at her. "I didn't break anything."

She shrugged, "If you did I wouldn't make you buy it. I was just kidding."

Charlie raised his eyebrows at us, "How in the world do you two know each other?"

"It's a long story," I muttered.

"I'm Alice Cullen," Alice said, offering Charlie her hand. Charlie's eyes lit up with recognition and he introduced himself. I glared at him, my arms crossed over my chest.

"Don't look so sour Bella; I thought you said you wanted to give Edward another chance." Charlie muttered. The traitor. Even if I did want to give him another chance—that didn't mean he needed to broadcast it to Edward's sister!

Alice squealed and ran out from around the counter; she threw her little arms around my neck. "Oh thank God, at least one of you has sense."

I staggered backwards under her weight, but I put my arms around her to steady us. "What are you talking about?"

"Edward is such an idiot to let you go. And he won't admit that he wants to fix things with you, he just sulks in his room and throws himself into work and everything; but at least you realize the inevitable."

I stared at her for a moment.

"Listen, I have a plan to get the two of you back together," she said, grasping onto my upper arms and shaking me.

"Slow down," I told her, "how are you even sure that he wants to try 'us' again."

"I'm Alice, I know everything," she said quite seriously. I couldn't help but smile at her. She was like a different person from the one who had come threateningly to my house after my disaster of a date with her older brother.

Charlie laughed at us and shook his head.

"Here's the deal, Bella," Alice said, stalking back around the counter and fishing around in her Gucci purse, "I have a date tonight and I'm going to convince Edward to come with me—I'll tell him I set him up on a blind date, but you'll be his date. It shouldn't be awkward because me and Jasper will be there."

"Who's Jasper?" I asked.

"Jasper's the love of my life," she replied happily, pulling her phone out and hitting a couple of buttons. She held it up to her ear and tapped her foot. "Hey Jazz! Listen, we're getting Edward and Bella back together."

She listened for a minute.

"No, I'm not meddling in his life. I'm just pushing him along in the right direction."

I grinned.

"We're going on a double date tonight."

One corner of her mouth quirked up into a smirk, "I'll make it worth your while."

She smiled wider, "Oh! I love you, Jazz! You're the greatest! Bye-bye!"

She hung up and grinned mischievously at me, "You're going out with us tonight. Wear something you can dance in."

"Um—you saw me walk across the store didn't you?"

"What?" She asked, returning most of her attentions to Charlie and taking out more jewelry cases.

"I can't walk across a flat surface without tripping, so what makes you think I can dance?" I asked.

"You may not be able to, but Edward can. He'll make sure you don't fall," Alice said, flipping through her key ring and then ducking below the counter to unlock another case.

"Ok," I said, unsure. But I got the feeling you don't argue with Alice.

She smiled at me and then turned to Charlie, "So what exactly do you want, Chief Swan? Tell me about this lovely lady of yours."

Charlie blushed and stammered, "She's a very nice woman…I don't want anything too extravagant, we're both too old for something too flashy."

"Aw, you're only as old as you feel, Charlie—can I call you Charlie?" Alice asked.

"Sure," he said. She gave him a charming smile.

"I'd recommend going with one of the solitaires, this one has a yellow gold band," she said holding up a ring with a small, round diamond.

Charlie nodded and Alice handed him the ring, "I like this one. It's simple."

"Then you should get it," I said, looking over my father's shoulder at the ring he held between his gnarled fingers. It was very pretty.

Alice smiled, "So is this your ring?"

"Yes ma'am," Charlie said proudly.

Alice grinned at him and took the ring back. She grabbed a box from behind the counter and set the ring into the velvet. She rung Charlie's purchase up and he handed her his credit card.

She returned it along with the ring box. Charlie took the box and let out a relieved breath.

"Congratulations, Charlie," Alice said with a smile, leaning across the counter.

"Thanks," he said smiling.

"So, Bella," Alice wheedled with a grin, "Jasper and I will come pick you up at eight."

I bit my lip and shifted my weight from one foot to the other.

"She'll be ready, Alice, don't you worry," Charlie averred. My head whipped around so that I could glower at him.

"Thanks Dad," I said sarcastically.

"Really, Bella—Alice here was nice enough to set this up for you, you could at least be grateful."

"I am grateful, but I'm also wary," I sighed.

"Oh don't worry, Edward will treat you with the utmost respect," Alice averred.

"I'm just thinking that setting him up on a blind date is not the sportiest idea ever," I groaned.

"You are right, he hates blind dates. But once he sees you I'm sure he'll be alright!" She insisted.

I totally was not convinced. "Blind date" had fiasco written all over it. "This is such a bad idea."

Alice gave me a pathetic look, her dark eyes wide and her bottom lip trembling, "Please Bella. I promise it will all work out."

I sighed and gave in. "If you say so, Alice. If you say so."

* * *

**So, there we go. BLIND DATE!! :) Bring on the blind date drama.**

**Who is grateful for Alice right now? I'm sure a lot of you are.**


	21. Sister Only Thinks She Knows Best

**Chapter 21: Sister Only Thinks She Knows Best**

"_She is your mirror, shining back at you with a world of possibilities. She is your witness, who sees you at your worst and best, and loves you anyway. She is your partner in crime, your midnight companion, someone who knows when you are smiling, even in the dark. She is your teacher, your defense attorney, your personal press agent, even your shrink. Some days, she's the reason you wish you were an only child."  
__-Barbara Alpert_

Alice threw the door to my room wide open, the knob hit against the wall opposite the door with enough force to dent the drywall.

"I could've sworn I locked that," I muttered at her, sticking my nose back into my medical text book.

She brandished a straightened out paperclip and a butter knife, "You did."

I stared at her for a minute before I went out of my room and called down the stairs, "Esme!"

My mother came running up, starring between Alice and me. Alice looked smug, while I'm sure that I looked furious.

"What's the matter?" She asked.

"Alice picked the lock into my room," I said angrily. I felt like a teenager again with a kid sister; instead of two adult siblings who should've been more mature than breaking and entering.

"I did knock," Alice said.

"So that's why you came to get the knife," Esme stated sagely. "I thought I taught you better than that."

I stared smugly at Alice.

"You're not supposed to use a butter knife, get a credit card or something so you don't scratch my doors," Esme chided while I stared at her my mouth agape.

"Are you seriously encouraging your daughter to break into my room?" I demanded.

"Who do you think taught her how to pick locks?" Esme asked, disappearing down the stairwell.

My mother was a criminal. Who would've thought? I would have to ask Carlisle later why Esme even knew how to pick locks.

Alice giggled at me, and followed me into my room. I debated throwing her out and moving my bureau in front of my door so she really couldn't get in, but it was no use fighting against Alice.

"What do you want, sister dear?" I asked through clenched teeth.

"You're going out with me and Jasper tonight," she stated proudly, her fists planted on her hips.

I quirked an eyebrow at her, "I have a lot of work to do here, Alice; and, besides, I'm not going to be a third wheel."

"Your work can wait—and you won't be a third wheel. I met a very nice young woman today and she's coming out to be your date!" Alice exclaimed, clapping her hands excitedly.

"Who is this girl?" I asked warily. Blind dates were never a good idea.

"I'm not telling you," Alice stated impishly, "you'll just have to come and find out."

"Have I met this person before?"

Alice shrugged.

"C'mon, Alice, tell me," I begged.

She pretended to lock her lips and then threw the key over her shoulder.

I narrowed my eyes at her, "Tell me or I'm not going."

"Oh yes you are," she said harshly.

"I'm a grown man, you can't intimidate me," I told her flopping back across my bed and staring arrogantly at her.

She stomped her foot, "Edward Anthony Masen-Cullen, you are going with me and Jasper and you will enjoy yourself! Don't make me call Daddy to come up here and threaten you."

I sighed, "Where do you plan on taking me?"

"We're going to the Mexican restaurant that has the dance floor so we can Salsa," she said, giving a flip to the skirt she was wearing.

"No, absolutely not," I told her.

"What?" He whined, "It'll be fun!"  
"What part of me dancing provocatively with a complete stranger will be fun?" I asked rhetorically.

"Who said she was a complete stranger?" Alice shot back, her eyes dancing.

"Excuse me? So I do know this young woman," I said.

Her eyes grew wide and she zipped her lips again, and then pretended to fetch a roll of what I assumed to be Duct tape out of one of her pockets and taped it across her lips.

"Fine," I sighed, scrubbed my hands across my face, "What time am I to get there?"

"About 8:30," she said. "Jazz and I are picking your date up, so we'll meet you at the restaurant."

I sighed but didn't argue. If I was driving myself then I could bail more easily.

"Take a shower," Alice commanded, "shave, you're getting a little scruffy. Put on some nice clothes." She made a beeline for my closet but I stopped her.

"I can pick out my own clothes, thank you very much," I said, blocking her way.

She pouted at me but conceded.

"Wear comfortable shoes," were her parting words as she pranced out of my room. I watched her go, debating getting a deadbolt for my bedroom door.

I sighed and stalked to my bathroom. I locked the door and started the shower. It didn't take long for the water to heat up and I showered quickly, running over possibilities for my 'date' to be.

Alice knew a lot of people, though I doubted she had met anyone at her job—the people that went into the antique store were either old people or collectors, so I doubted she'd met her there.

But who would it be? Someone she knew from college? God I hoped not, she majored in fashion design and marketing that would be awful to be set up with a mindless fashion zombie.

I wanted a girl who knew how to enjoy a good book, who liked music. Who was intelligent.

I didn't want some blonde bimbo who just wanted to be with me because I was good arm-candy. I didn't even like blondes.

I preferred brunettes. Preferably with brown eyes, longer hair too.

I'd either just described Bella Swan or my adopted mother. I groaned and beat my head against the wet tile. This was just getting to be ridiculous—I couldn't get Bella out of my brain. No matter how hard I tried not to think about her, she just kept coming back. I couldn't think about her, not with everything else that was weighing so heavily on my mind.

I jumped out of the shower and wrapped a towel around my waist. I shaved quickly, not really doing a good job and cutting myself in places but I just wanted my ridiculous date to be over with.

By the time my shower was done it was 7 o'clock. I still have another forty-five minutes before I had to leave.

I searched my closet for something to wear, even debated wearing something that didn't match just to piss Alice off. I finally settled on some dark jeans and a polo shirt. I fished my dad's old leather jacket off its hanger. I held it to my face and breathed in deeply.

I swore I could still smell my dad's cologne on that jacket. It was the one of the only possessions from the car that was salvageable after that night. Carlisle had taken it for me and when I was released from the hospital he gave it back to me. He told me never to forget my Dad—that it was very important that I treasured the memories I had of my parents and that he and Esme didn't want to replace them.

I sighed and slipped the jacket onto my shoulders. I looked in my mirror. I looked like Dad. Albeit with red hair, but Dad nonetheless.

I think he would've liked that I was wearing it. He loved that jacket.

"Knock, knock," my mother said, opening the door.

I turned away from the mirror and looked at her.

"Are you very angry at Alice?" She asked, sitting on the corner of my bed.

"Not really," I said, sitting next to her. "She had good intentions."

Esme nodded and then smiled.

"You know who I'm being set up with, don't you?" I accused.

"Of course I do, I'm your mother I know everything," she said. She was as bad as Alice sometimes—what was it with women and omniscience?

I shook my head at her. "I don't suppose you'll tell me who I'm going out with tonight."

"Alice and Jasper and another very lovely young woman whom you're going to enjoy spending the evening with," she said with a brilliant smile.

I groaned and rolled my eyes, "Does this lovely young woman whom I'm going to enjoy spending the evening with have a name?"

"Yes she does," Esme nodded.

"But you won't tell me it," I said.

"Nope, I'm under an oath of secrecy, Alice made me promise not to tell," she said with a laugh.

I sighed, "Thanks a lot, Mother."

"I promise Edward, you'll have a good time. You just have to let yourself go—don't worry about anything else, don't over think things. Just be the charming young man that I know you are."

I nodded mutely, I couldn't think of anything to say. She patted my knee, "Go have fun."

I snagged my keys off of my dresser and trotted down the stairs. I was a little eager to get out of the house and do something, and I was ready to meet whoever Alice had set me up with.

I was the first to arrive at the restaurant; I told the hostess that there were three more people in my party and to seat us at a booth. I slid into one of the benches, my back to the door.

"You actually came!" Alice squealed running up to me and throwing her arms around my neck. I chuckled and put her into a headlock.

"Don't mess up my hair Edward," she threatened.

"What hair?" I asked, running my fingers through her short, choppy dark hair. She'd had it long for her entire life but when she hit college she chopped it all off and donated it to Locks of Love.

She pulled away from me and I stood up to shake Jasper's hand. He smiled and then nodded over my shoulder.

I spun around to come face to face with my date.

Bella Swan.

* * *

**Dun, dun, dun.**

**If your sister (if you don't have a sister just pretend) tried to set you up on a blind date, would you go? Probably not, my sister would set me up with a creep.**


	22. Date, Attempt Two

**Chapter 22: Date, Attempt Two**

"_How far away the stars seem, and how far is our first kiss, and ah, how old my heart."  
__-William Butler Yeats_

I stared at my closet despairingly. I owned absolutely nothing appropriate for the kind of date I was going on. Salsa dancing? What does one wear while Salsa dancing? I had a hideous vision of myself wearing one of those skimpy, beaded numbers that the Salsa dancers where on shows like Dancing with the Stars and So You Think You Can Dance?

I glared at the clock on my nightstand. 8:02.

"I though you might be having this problem," a voice said from my doorway.

I jumped and almost dropped the towel I was clutching around my body. I thought for sure that I'd locked my door.

"You can't be in here I'm not dressed," I spluttered.

"Oh, calm down," she muttered brandishing a clothing bag, "I come bearing gifts."

I sighed and glared at her. She reached into the bag and pulled out a black skirt and a red top. Both were light, airy material.

"Put these on," she commanded tossing them onto my bed.

She made no move to leave. She noticed my alarmed look and chuckled.

"I'll turn around to give you some privacy, in the mean time I'll look through your shoes to see what you should wear," she said, stalking to my closet and inspecting the shoes I kept there.

I sighed and changed as quickly as I could. The skirt flowed nicely and fell to the knee. The top was clingy but in all the right places. I looked at myself in the mirror attached to the back of my closet door.

I actually looked like a woman instead of an awkward college kid.

Alice turned around and looked at me smugly, "Your welcome."

I giggled and bent to hug her, "Thank you, Alice."

She laughed and tossed a pair of black pumps at me. I hadn't worn them since my college interview.

"I can't wear those, I'll break my ankle," I said, shaking me head.

Alice gave me a disapproving look, "The heel on these isn't even three inches, you'll do it."

I sighed and she jerked me forward by one ankle and shoved the shoes on my feet.

"There," she stated, putting her hands on her narrow hips, "perfection."

I sighed. I was going to fall over and make a fool of myself in front of Edward. Just great.

I followed Alice outside and slid into the back seat of Alice's canary yellow Porsche. A tall, blonde man was in the front seat. He turned around and shook my hand, introducing himself in a thick Southern drawl as Jasper Whitlock.

I smiled and nodded, "I'm Bella Swan."

"Oh I know," he chuckled. "I've heard all about you."

I blushed and buried my face in my hands.

"Don't be embarrassed," Alice chided, sliding the key into the ignition. "I told him everything Edward told me."

I felt all of the blood drain from my face and I demanded, "What did he tell you?"

"Don't worry, nothing incriminating," she said, turning around in her seat to wink at me.

I groaned. This was going to be the most awkward date ever.

We arrived at the little Mexican restaurant a couple of minutes later. Alice pulled into the parking spot next to Edward's silver Volvo.

"Good, he's already here," she muttered stalking up to the front door like a predatory cat.

Jasper and I lagged behind.

"Is she always this aggressive?" I inquired.

He nodded and blushed and I decided to not further pursue the subject.

Alice was already sitting at a booth her arms thrown around Edward's neck. Edward greeted Jasper and then spun around to look at me.

His striking green eyes looked confused and then he grinned but smothered it. He shook my hand and turned to Alice, his eyes dark. I was left staring at Edward's back. Jasper patted my shoulder and shook his head. I don't know if it was meant to be comforting but it made me feel worse.

Edward hissed something into Alice's ear and then he turned, angling his body so that I couldn't see his eyes.

Alice shoved him so that he stumbled forward towards me.

"Hello, Bella," he said smoothly, not meeting my eyes.

"Hello," I mumbled, embarrassed. How could I have been so stupid to think that he would still want me? My eyes burned with unshed tears.

"Are you crying?" Edward asked an edge in his voice.

"No," I murmured, willing the tears not to spill over.

He sighed and put his hand on my shoulder, "I'm sorry. Please. Please don't cry again."

I took a deep breath and blew it out—finally looking up at Edward. Apprehension was written in his light green eyes.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have cried," I muttered.

"It's not your fault," Edward said in a rush, "I just always seem to make you cry. I'm such an idiot."

"No, I'm fine," I said, dabbing my eyes on my sleeve.

He sighed and put his arm around my shoulders. He was warm and his scent was intoxicating. It made my head swim. I could smell the leather from his jacket, feel it against the nape of my neck.

I slid into the booth, Edward at my side.

It was kind of surreal, sitting next to Edward after all of those months of dreaming about him, hating him, longing for him, forgetting him.

Edward already had a Coke sitting at his elbow, and Alice was trying to flag down our waitress to give her our drink orders. She ordered a Sprite and Jasper got a beer. I got a Coke.

Alice squealed as the Salsa music spilled through the speakers and some other daring couples made their way to the dance floor, "Dance with me, Jazz!"  
He sighed and got up, letting Alice pull him by the arm to the dance floor.

Alice and Jasper danced for a while—until our food came—and Edward and I sat in the booth, trying to avoid awkward silences.

He apologized profusely for making me cry on our first date. I finally had to tell him to shut-up, that I was over it—which I wasn't, but at least it got him to stop groveling for forgiveness.

Our food came and we ate in relative silence, Alice occasionally kicked me under the table to try to get me to talk to Edward, but if I were being truthful, I was terrified to talk to the man.

I'd never been in a relationship before, I didn't know how they worked and the prospect of it scared me more than a little.

Edward made a sharp, pained sound and glared at Alice across the table. She innocently shoved nachos into her dainty mouth. I figured she'd resorted to kicking him, too.

"So Bella, how's college been?" He asked, through clenched teeth, shooting death glares at Alice.

I swallowed thickly, "It's been fine. How's your internship going?"

"Oh, it's fine. I'm almost done." He said.

I nodded, "What do you plan on doing when you're finished? Do you want to stay in Forks?"

He swallowed, the muscles of his neck contracting, his hands fisted on the table, the tendons standing out against his pale skin. "I don't know," he replied in a tight voice.

Alice raised her eyes brows at him, probably as weirded out by his reaction to that question as I was.

"Ok," Alice said, the two letters drawn out, "so Bella, what exactly do you want to do after college?"

I blushed and stared at the tablecloth, "I was thinking of teaching."

"You'd make a good teacher," Edward said quietly.

I stared at him for a moment and nodded.

He smiled, but it came out more like a nervous grimace. I tried to smile back with similar results.

Alice huffed across the table, "You two need to calm down—stop freaking out. Yes you went on one bad date; don't let that spoil this one."

Edward clenched his jaw and then relaxed a little, "I'm sorry, Bella."

"Stop apologizing," I reprimanded. "I told Alice that I wanted a second chance with you—I'm the one who got bent out of shape on our first date."

"I shouldn't have pressed the matter," he said quietly, squeezing my knee under the table.

His hand sent strange tingles up and down my leg. "It's alright, I've thought a lot about what was said that night and I'm working on it."

Edward nodded.

After all of the serious talk, the conversation lapsed into lighter matters, Alice trying to make plans for shopping trips, more college questions, and funny stories from the Cullen household.

But never anything too serious, a never anything about the hospital. It seemed to be a sour subject with Edward. I wished he trusted me enough to tell me why. But he didn't.

Alice forced Edward to drive me home, not that I was arguing. He seemed uncomfortable, jittery, the entire way home.

He drove very fast so we arrived back home in no time. Sue's Accord was in the driveway, so I knew everyone was probably inside ready to instigate the Spanish Inquisition if I wasn't forthcoming about details of the date.

He walked me to the front door, like a gentlemen.

"I had a good time, Bella," he said, shoving his hands deep into his pockets.

I nodded, "I did too. Thank you for not ditching when you found out I was your date."

He chuckled musically, "Thank you for wanting to give me a second chance."

He hesitated a moment before dipping his head down to kiss me. I'd never been kissed before.

It was over quickly, and it was chaste. Nothing deep, just a quick brush of his lips against mine, but I was intoxicated by it. My first kiss.

He jerked back, as if burned and turned around to his car without another word.

I was left standing on the front porch, dazzled and bewildered.

* * *

**Everyone say, "Awww!" **

**I don't want any comments that Bella's too old to not have been kissed. I'm 17 and I've never been kissed, so I have the feeling it will be a while before it happens. Don't hate on people that have never been kissed. It's not their fault.**

**What's your favourite Mexican food? I'm a mole' fan myself…or empanadas. **


	23. Ciao Bella

**Chapter 23: Ciao Bella**

"_Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves - regret for the past and fear of the future."  
__-Fulton Oursler_

From the first moment I realized Bella was my date until we left the restaurant, I was going through inner turmoil. How could I have been so stupid? Of course Alice had set me up with Bella Swan.

And I was most frightened by the fact that I wasn't annoyed or upset over the date. I was actually excited.

That made things more complicated.

And then I had the opportunity to drive her home. We could be in such a close proximity.

I drove Bella home quietly, sneaking glances at her as surreptitiously as I could.

She was gorgeous.

I couldn't believe that I was being given a second chance with her. A second chance that I couldn't take.

Life sucked sometimes.

When I pulled into her driveway, I saw that two cars were parked there—I figured that her father and Sue Clearwater were both home.

I opened her door for her and then led her to her front door, "I had a good time, Bella." I was so nervous, my stomach felt like it was going to drop out of my abdomen and cause a mess at my feet.

"I did too. Thank you for not ditching when you found out I was your date," she said, nodding her head and not meeting my eyes. I wanted to tip her chin up and study her eyes and maybe kiss her.

"Thank you for wanting to give me a second chance." I said with a nervous laugh. I really kind of wished that she hadn't wanted to give me a second chance, my life would've been so much easier if she had thought I was a total jerk and didn't want to go out with me.

My life just had to be complicated.

I could have easily survived the next couple of months if Bella hadn't have agreed to go out with me.

Maybe I should've tried harder to figure out who my date was that night. If I hadn't known it was Bella I probably would have skipped.

It wasn't that I didn't want to go out with Bella—heck if I were under different circumstances, I probably would've gone crawling back to her by then…but now that I had gone out with her successfully it made my life—and my relationship with her—exponentially more complicated.

Bella stared at me with those big brown eyes of hers, hope and fear mingled across those dual chocolate pools.

And I couldn't help myself. I dropped my head down and pressed my lips against hers. She was warm and soft in all the right places. Her lips tasted sort of spicy, a lingering effect of the Mexican food we had eaten.

I wanted to stay like that forever, glued to Bella. But I couldn't.

I pulled away and ran back to my car and I didn't look back at Bella who was probably wondering why I'd kissed and run.

I dove into my Volvo and threw it into gear.

I cursed loudly as I drove down the highway as fast as I could. I used every word I could think of, every word that I learned from friends in high school, college and things on TV. I cursed myself; I cursed Alice for setting me up on that date. I cursed Aro, and Carlisle and my biological parents.

How could I have been so stupid?

I drove to the cemetery and parked in front of the dark, wrought iron gates. I knew exactly where my parent's graves were. They were buried in the back left corner of the cemetery, they shared a headstone. Edward and Elizabeth Masen. October 19, 1959-January 7, 1991 and July 3, 1962-January 7, 1991. I hated January 7.

I stared into the darkness, thinking of them—running through every memory I had of my parents. They were few and far between. I wished I'd had more time with them—the Cullen's were nice, but they weren't Mom and Dad.

I sighed and threw my Volvo into reverse and drove back to the Cullens' house.

I pulled into my parents' long driveway and sped to the garage. Alice and Jasper were there, waiting for me. Alice was perched on top of her yellow Porsche, Jasper was standing in front of her, his hands on her waist.

"So, how'd it go?" Alice chirped.

I cursed again and she gave me a disparaging look.

"I thought it was going well," she huffed.

"I kissed her, Ali," I groaned, pulling at my hair.

God, how could I have been so stupid? What was I thinking? At the time, I was thinking how good Bella tasted—by that didn't matter anymore.

Alice squealed and clapped excitedly, "Hooray, finally Edward is in a healthy relationship! Oh Jazzy, we have to go on a double date again with Edward and Bella—that was so much fun!"

I stared at her and then walked towards the wall; I muttered more swear words and beat my head against the wall, "I can't, Alice."

Alice hopped off the hood of her Porsche, "Why can't you, Edward?"

She pranced closer to me and planted her tiny fists on her hips. I sighed and grabbed her by the shoulders and shook her, "I'm moving to Italy, Alice. I told Aro I'd go."

She pulled back and her hazel eyes widened. She slapped me repeatedly, and then punched my chest. I guess I deserved it. I didn't try to fight back, or to tell her to stop or that I was probably bruising and that she was really hurting me. I let her do it because I knew she needed to punch me, because I'd pissed her off. I did deserve it.

"Why are you going with that child molester?" She asked. She slapped me again and this time her nails dug in and scratched my cheek.

I could feel the blood as it dribbled down to my chin.

Jasper spotted the blood and ran up behind her and grabbed her arms, "Alice calm down. You don't want to hurt him."

Esme came out into the garage, because I'm sure that she heard Alice slapping me from inside and the house and she sure wasn't spying on us to see how the our dates went.

"Alice calm down, what's going on?" She demanded, taking Alice's hands, and kissing her forehead.

"That idiot," Alice spat at me, "he's going to Italy."

Esme gasped and stared at me, I looked away and prayed for someone to come to my rescue, I looked around and saw that Carlisle walked into the garage and leaned against his Mercedes, "Yes, Alice he is. He made that decision several days ago."

"You knew, Dad?" She demanded, here eyes going between me and Carlisle and Esme.

"Of course I knew, Alice," Carlisle replied sighing. When I told him I was going he'd been upset—he hadn't wanted me to go. But it was my life, my decision. I thought my family would've been supportive.

"What are you going to tell Bella?" Alice seethed.

"I'm not going to tell Bella anything, we've gone on two dates that does not mean I have to tell her everything about my life," I replied loftily.

Alice stomped her foot and opened her mouth several times trying to figure out something to say. But apparently I'd angered her too much because she was at a loss for words.

"Yes it does," Jasper replied. His earnest blue eyes bored into mine, "You've taunted that poor girl with a relationship for months now, the least you could do is tell her that it ain't gonna happen! That you're just runnin' away like a scared dog, tail between his legs."

I stared at him for a long time, "This is ridiculous. I thought you all would be happy that I'm at least doing something with my life!"

Alice, whom I hadn't realized was crying up until this point, said very softly, "Your parents would be very proud that you've gotten such a prestigious position in Italy."

Her voice was hallow and sad. And with that she pulled away from Jasper and Esme and ran into the house.

Alice had never spoken of my biological parents before. She was too young to remember when Esme and Carlisle had adopted me—she claims she can't remember anything until I came into her life. She hadn't known I was adopted until she was in the fourth grade when her teacher had adopted an orphan from China. Alice had thought that it was a good idea and she told Esme and Carlisle that they should adopt a baby too. They told her they already had.

But she never mentioned my real parents. She hadn't known Edward and Elizabeth…to her they were just two random people killed in a car accident eighteen years ago.

How would she know they would've been proud of me?

They wouldn't have been. I was running away, secluding myself.

If I had wanted to make them proud I would've stayed in boring, old Forks and worked at the hospital, brought Bella flowers every morning before work and took her on dates afterwards. My parents would've been proud to see me married and had children and I'd been transparently, abundantly happy.

But I couldn't have that.

I was going to go to Italy and be a pediatric cardiologist and probably grow to be a creepy old man like Aro.

And I couldn't fight it.

I'd already signed the contract.

* * *

**Go ahead. Hate me. I had a couple people beg me not to send him to Volterra...buuuuuut... Don't worry!!! This story has a happy ending. I swear it does. It has about six chapters left. And the last one will be happy.**

**Who wants to help Alice beat up Edward right now? I would. I mean, he is being abundantly stupid.**


	24. Kisses and Proposals

**Chapter 24: Kisses and Proposals **

"_I want to break every clock. The hands of time could never move again.  
__We could stay in this moment for the rest of our lives.  
__Is it over now hey, is it over now?  
__I want to be your last first kiss. That you'll ever have.  
__I want to be your last first kiss."  
__-"Inevitable" by Anberlin_

Holy crap. Edward had kissed me. Edward Masen-Cullen had kissed me. On my front porch. Edward kissed me. Kiss. Me. Edward kissed. Holy…

"Bella?" Charlie called, opening the front door and stopping my rapid-fire thoughts of kisses and Edward Masen-Cullen.

"Everything ok out here, Bells?" He asked.

"Oh, yeah, everything's ok." I breathed and then I couldn't contain it anymore I started jumping up and down, laughing and crying just a little.

"What's got her so excited?" Seth asked from the kitchen as I hopped my way through the front hallway.

"I'm pretty sure she and Doctor McDreamy were playing tonsil hockey on the front porch," Leah said smugly.

"Ew, disgusting, disgusting!" Seth said, leaning back in one of the kitchen chairs.

Sue smiled at me, and patted Charlie's hand because he looked like he was about to have an aneurysm.

"My first kiss," I said happily, touching my lips with my fingertips.

"That was your first kiss?" Leah demanded.

I blushed and nodded. It's not like I'd been kissed in high school. Seriously. She knew that.

"Aww! Edward was the first to kiss the virgin lips of Bella Swan," Leah said with a giggle.

Charlie turned the exact shade of a plum and then started to splutter something incoherent, probably because Leah had used the word 'virgin' in a sentence about me.

Sue patted him on the back as he choked. I tried to think of something to say that would console him—but I figured he's just have to deal with the fact that his twenty-one-year-old daughter had finally kissed a boy.

I was so pathetic…

"So Bella," Sue began, shooting a glance at Dad and taking my hands in hers as she led me to the kitchen table. "Tell us all about your date."

"Ok, I'm going to go shoot some hoops, Charlie you coming?" Seth said, getting up from the table and patting my father on the back. I'm sure neither of them wanted to dissect every single detail of my date with the local, yummy doctor.

"Sure, son," Charlie said, putting his hand on Seth's shoulder. The two of them navigated out of the house and into the driveway where Charlie had recently installed a basketball hoop for Seth. I was glad that Sue's kids were becoming a permanent fixture at our house. I briefly wondered when Charlie would make it officially permanent—but I wasn't going to rush him.

"Ok, so tell us, where did you go?" Leah demanded plunking a mug of tea in front of me.

"We went out with his sister and her boyfriend to the Mexican restaurant."

"Oh, muy caliente," Leah purred in a low sultry voice, sending me and Sue into a fit of giggles.

"Si, si," I agreed, still laughing. I blew on my tea and took a sip.

"So what else," Sue prompted.

"Well, we both were a little wary in the beginning because of how disastrous our first date was, but he was really nice. Alice had to start the conversation but once it was going it was good. He apologized for our first date."

"As he should have," Sue said with a nod. I smiled at her and took her hand into mine.

"Ok, so we talked about college and our families and stuff," I said with a hint of a smirk as I recalled the way Edward and Alice told embarrassing stories about each other. I remembered the laughter as it had bubbled in my belly.

"And there was nothing weird?" Leah prompted, "He's been acting weird the last couple of days."

"No, nothing weird," I said and then through about it, "well, kind of. But it was probably just nothing."

"What was it?" Leah and Sue demanded in unison.

"It's nothing to psychoanalyze, I probably just thought it was weird."

"What was it?" Leah demanded again.

"He just got really tense when I asked him what his plans are for once his internship is over."

Leah's mouth closed into a hard-pressed line, "Yeah, his internship ends on Sunday."

Sunday was in three days, maybe that's why he'd been so intense and weird about it. I tried to write it off as just that, but worry was gnawing at my stomach. I clenched my jaw, "Maybe he's just stressed about it ending."

"Maybe," Leah said softly. I nodded, trying to convince myself of the words.

But somehow they wouldn't stick.

I had the sinking feeling that I didn't know everything about Edward and that I wouldn't get the chance to know it. I was afraid that he would keep me out.

I sighed and stared into my tea, swirling it around before I took another sip.

"I'm sure that's it," Sue declared, patting my hand. "It's probably stressful enough being an intern, but now he's going to be a full-fledged doctor. He's probably worried by the finality of it."

"Yeah, that's got to be it," Leah said, sort of unconvincingly.

I sighed and nodded, I hoped that Sue was right. I wanted to say she was right.

I got up and put my tea cup into the sink and rinsed it out. I wondered what Edward was doing at this very moment, probably still driving.

Charlie and Seth came in laughed and patting each other on the back, talking about some kind of weird basketball play or move or something that I didn't understand, nor had any desire to understand.

Charlie looked at me and smiled; he very discretely looked at Sue and then patted his pocket where I'm sure the ring was hidden.

I nodded to him, giving him my blessing.

Seth and Leah sat down at the table and I moved to join them.

Sue was busying herself with washing the dishes—that used to be my job, but I was happy to relinquish it to my step-mother.

She had her back to us, and so Charlie pulled the small, black velvet ring box out of his pocket and showed it to the three of us. We grinned and all nodded our consent.

"Sue?" Charlie asked in a tense, nervous voice.

"Yeah?" She asked turning around to see what was wrong.

He took a deep breath and knelt awkwardly in front of her.

"Will you marry me?" He asked, and then he held his breath.

Sue looked at him stunned, she held a dishtowel between her hands, and took a step backwards. She looked to the three of us who all had smug little smiles on our faces as we urged her with our eyes to say 'yes'.

She started to cry and Charlie's smile faded. "Sue?" He asked quietly, standing up, "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine," she sobbed, and then tried to dry her tears on the towel. "Oh my God."

"Please, Sue," Charlie pleaded.

"Oh of course," she said, smiling a watery smile. Charlie fumbled the ring out of the box and then fit it on her finger.

Leah and I had both started crying openly, watching as our parents went from skirting around being happy to truly being happy. Seth discretely wiped his cheeks on the shoulder of his T-shirt.

Sue looked down at the ring on the third finger of her left hand and smiled, "We're getting married." And then she burst into a round of fresh tears.

Charlie gathered her into his arms and started to sooth her, kissing her cheeks and running his fingers through her raven, black hair.

The three of us children slipped out of the room, not really wanting to witness our parents be lovey-dovey with each other.

We found ourselves on the front porch, everyone on various levels of the steps or leaning against the posts.

"So, they're getting married," Seth said after a brief silence.

"Yeah, they are," Leah said quietly.

"Charlie's gonna be our dad," he said again.

"Yes, Captain Obvious, when he marries Mom he'll be our step-dad." Leah said, rolling her eyes and tapping her fingernails against her thigh.

Seth tilted his head to look at me as I sat on the lowest step, "We'll be siblings."

"Stop stating the obvious Seth," Leah complained, "Yes. Mom is marrying Charlie. Charlie's going to be our step-dad, Mom's going to be Bella's step-mom, and we'll be step-siblings."

"I know, but it's weird to think about," Seth said.

"What that our parents are getting married and none of us are married?" I asked, still dwelling on Edward and that kiss.

"Um, I'm still in high school," Seth said and Leah and I laughed.

"I think she meant that neither one of us is married yet," Leah sighed. "If you haven't noticed neither one of us is really winning gold in this game we call love."

Seth grinned, "I don't know about that—I thought Bells was playing tonsil hockey with Dr. Love?"

We all burst into giggles. Our mirth continued as night encroached, but I was still wary of what morning would bring.

* * *

**Charlie and Sue are adorable. Seriously. **

**Who likes the new Swan-Clearwater family union? I certainly do.**


	25. Not Here, Not There

**Chapter 25: Not Here, Not There**

"_I am not yours, not lost in you,  
__Not lost, although I long to be  
__Lost as a candle lit at noon,  
__Lost as a snowflake in the sea.  
__You love me, and I find you still  
__A spirit beautiful and bright,  
__Yet I am I, who long to be  
__Lost as a light is lost in light.  
__Oh plunge me deep in love -- put out  
__My senses, leave me deaf and blind,  
__Swept by the tempest of your love,  
__A taper in a rushing wind."  
__-"I Am Not Yours" by Sarah Teasdale_

What was I supposed to tell Bella? That was what I asked myself all night, in between bouts of cursing myself and Aro.

Stupid.

How could I have been so stupid?

My plane tickets had a date on them, Monday morning. Less than twenty-four hours after my internship ended.

I had to call Bella. I needed to call Bella.

But I didn't.

I spent the weekend working, avoiding Leah in the hallways of the hospital, and avoiding Alice in the hallways of my home.

I dialed Bella's phone number forty-six times on Sunday night and hung up each time before she could answer.

I felt like a coward.

I fell asleep remembering things, snippets of memories that played behind my eyes like fragments of movies.

I dreamed of my parents.

I dreamed of kissing Bella.

I dreamed of marrying her and having children with her and staying in Forks until all of my hair turned gray and they put me in the ground next to my parents.

I showered and shaved and managed not to nick myself because I was so out of it, I'm sure I would have cut myself.

And finally in the end, I put my suitcases in the backseat and trunk of Carlisle's Mercedes and stared out the window—memorizing Forks and Washington—as my father drove me to Seattle and the airport.

I called Bella four times in the car, and continually hung up before she could answer. I wrote her an email from my iPod Touch and then realized that I didn't know her email address.

I sighed and felt like a love-sick puppy.

And eventually Carlisle told me to suck it up, that I'd made my bed and I had to lie in it. I didn't want to lie in it. The sheets were soiled and smelled bad, and it felt like I'd be lying in the bed I would die in.

I'd made my life into an indiscernible mess and I had to figure it out for myself. I'd dug a grave and then Aro had buried me in it.

I felt like my heart was being ripped out.

My whole body felt like it was on fire, embers running through my veins. I missed Alice and Esme, and Emmett and Rose. I missed being an actual person instead of just this shell.

I tried to think of something to do that could fix what I'd damaged so irreparably.

I finally let my fifth phone call ring to Bella's voice mail. I felt brave, but stupid.

"Bella. I'm sorry that I haven't called you sooner. I'm just, I'm sorry but I don't think that I can be in a relationship right now. It's not your fault. God, please don't believe that this is your fault. It's mine. I just, I didn't know if I believed in love when I first met you and I'm still not entirely sure I believe in it.

"I told you that I lost my parents, and it's true. I'll never see them again because they were so distracted by each other that my father wasn't concentrating on driving and he was hit by a drunk driver who veered into oncoming traffic. I guess I feel like their love was their downfall.

"I've never really admitted that to myself."

I stopped there and stared out the window, not really knowing what else to say to the woman I loved and didn't love all at the same time. Carlisle patted my shoulder in a firm, manly but affectionate way.

I continued, "I'm so sorry that I've hurt you. I shouldn't have.

"Bella, I wish I had to words to tell you exactly how I feel. But just know that having a relationship with me right now wouldn't have worked out.

"I'm just. God, I don't know what I am."

I sighed and closed my eyes, "Bella. Promise me something. Be happy. Don't ever wonder if it would've worked out between us, just move on and be happy. You're beautiful, smart and funny. And I promise there is someone out there for you.

"I'll always sort of love you, Isabella Swan."

Always.

I hung up.

Carlisle looked at me out of the corner of his eye, "I'm surprised you told her of your parents."

I shrugged, "She deserves to know."

"Then she also deserves the truth of where you're going."

"I didn't tell her?" I asked, bemused. I didn't really remember the message; it felt fuzzy inside my brain.

"No, you just said that a relationship between the two of you wouldn't have worked," he said.

I cursed and Carlisle gave me a disapproving look.

"Edward, I'll never understand what it felt like to lose your parents the way you did—but I don't understand why you won't let yourself be healed."

"Some wounds can't be healed," I replied.

"I'm a doctor, Edward. Yes they can."

"Wounds of the heart can't heal," I said.

"Did you know Esme was married before I met her?" He asked.

No, I hadn't. I shook my head and stared at him, waiting for the story.

"She was in an abusive relationship. I met her because she was brought to the emergency room. Her husband at the time had pushed her down the steps of their front porch. She was pregnant at the time of the attack.

"When I first saw her she was on a gurney, clutching her stomach as she bled. She just kept begging me to save her baby."

I narrowed my eyes at him, "Did you save her baby?" I asked. Alice didn't seem to be damaged in any way. And I'd never thought that Carlisle wasn't her father.

"Edward, I know what you're thinking. That Alice is perfectly fine, what in the world am I talking about."

I stared at him, "That's exactly what I'm thinking."

He chuckled once, humorlessly, "I didn't save her child."

"Oh my God, Alice is adopted?!" I demanded.

"No, would you just listen?" He said.

"Sorry," I mumbled, I felt like I was living a lie.

"Esme gave birth to a stillborn son for her first child, because I could not save that baby. She blamed me for the longest time, because I couldn't save him. I'd fallen in love with her but she rejected me. We knew each other for years before she finally agreed to go out with me.

"And finally when we were married and wanted to start a family we were afraid it wouldn't happen given her history. Alice was a miracle, but Esme was so sick when Alice was born. She's been barren ever since. We had plans to adopt long before Alice came along, and even after she was born we still wanted another child. And then you came and were so little and scared. And Esme wanted so badly to take you in.

"She thought that maybe we could teach you how to love again." He sighed and looked over at me, "Do you remember your senior year, when you refused to go on dates with anyone?"

I nodded my head that was the year I'd rebelled, sick and tired of being the man candy at my private school.

"Esme pulled me aside one night after dinner and told me that there still was hope that you could love again. If she could trust me and love me even after what she'd been through, then there was still a hope that you could trust yourself."

I stared at my father, "Carlisle, do you still think there's hope?"

"Oh there's always hope, son. Even if I think you've made a poor decision. There's always hope."

"What if there isn't?"

"Did Bella Swan give you a second chance?" He asked, seemingly randomly.

"Yes," I said, not seeing the connection.

"Well, she obviously thought there was hope," he said with a smug smile.

I sighed, "How am I supposed to get out of my contract with Aro?"

"I don't know," he said.

"So what am I supposed to do?" I asked him.

"You're a smart man, Edward. You'll figure it out."

I sighed and stared at him, "What am I supposed to do in the mean time?"

"Work hard, save lives and try to come up with a bloody good apology for Bella Swan."

* * *

**Amen, Carlisle! I know I said no more emo chapters...If forgot about this one. But seriously this is the last. The next ones at least have happy moments in them, even if there are sadder moments.**

**How do you think Edward's going to fix things? I'd like everyone else's takes on this.**


	26. Love and Other Diseases

**Chapter 26: Love and Other Diseases**

"_She said, 'If we're gonna make this work,  
__You've gotta let me inside even though it hurts.  
__Don't hide the broken parts that I need to see,'  
__She said, 'I like you a lot, it's the way it's gotta be  
__You gotta love yourself if you can ever love me'."  
__-"Whatever It Takes" by Lifehouse_

The weekend was consumed with wedding planning. Both Charlie and Sue had decided that they didn't want a huge white wedding, which suited me just fine. They were getting married on the beach at La Push, and only have friends and close family come. Then they planned on having a bonfire as a reception.

Who has a bonfire at a wedding?

Charlie and Sue do.

My weekend was so taken up by wedding plans and details and school stuff that I hadn't really had time to think about Edward. Admittedly when I woke up in the middle of the night, I could feel the faint tingle on my lips that still lingered from his kiss.

Sunday night my phone would not stop ringing and I didn't recognize the number so I never answered it. I hated talking on the phone, it made me nervous.

Charlie wondered who was calling me but I said it was a wrong number and let my phone ring.

We talked about my mother some more, and Charlie debated calling her to tell her that he was getting married. I told him not to.

"Why not? She told me when she got married."

"She took herself out of the equation, she doesn't deserve to know," I said.

Charlie smiled at me and put his arm over my shoulders, "What's happened to you Bells, you've changed."

"What do you mean?"

"You used to be withdrawn and afraid—and it wasn't just because Edward took you out on a bad date, and it wasn't because of your mother, I never knew what exactly was wrong but you've grow out of it."

I shrugged and smiled, "I just feel different. Like I can take on the world."

Charlie smiled and hugged me to his side, "You can take on the world, Kid."

I smiled and rested my head against his shoulder.

Monday morning came in a rush as I ran to my classes, listening to English lectures and taking notes on Chemistry labs. I drew flower arrangements in the margins of the paper and then I drew Edward's eyes.

It hit me in the middle of Economics that Edward had yet to call me, and it'd been three days since our date. I wished I hadn't deleted his contact from my phone so that I could call him myself.

I felt bold. Unstoppable.

I tried to remember his phone number, but he'd put it into my phone himself, I'd never dialed it.

I should've called Alice, but I wanted to contact Edward all on my own. I drove to the hospital, boldly figuring that maybe he'd come in that day, or I could ask where he was.

I turned my phone on and checked my messages as I went to the pediatrics floor, riding the elevator as an automated voice told me that I had one new voicemail from around seven this morning.

Leah spotted me as the heavy metal doors slithered open and waved me over frantically.

I held up one finger to silence her as the voice I'd been longing to hear came through the speaker of my phone.

"Bella. I'm sorry that I haven't called you sooner." I smiled and mentally forgave him for not calling me, "I'm just, I'm sorry but I don't think that I can be in a relationship right now. It's not your fault. God, please don't believe that this is your fault. It's mine. I just, I didn't know if I believed in love when I first met you and I'm still not entirely sure I believe in it."

My mouth felt numb and dry, my tongue was too thick and swollen. I wanted to cry but he kept talking.

"I told you that I lost my parents, and it's true. I'll never see them again because they were so distracted by each other that my father wasn't concentrating on driving and he was hit by a drunk driver who veered into oncoming traffic. I guess I feel like their love was their downfall.

"I've never really admitted that to myself."

There was a pause and I heard him breath raggedly on the other end. It must've been hard to talk about his parents.

I felt tears prick my eyes.

"I'm so sorry that I've hurt you. I shouldn't have. Bella, I wish I had to words to tell you exactly how I feel. But just know that having a relationship with me right now wouldn't have worked out.

"I'm just. God, I don't know what I am."

I hiccupped and pressed a hand to my mouth to choke back sobs. What went wrong?

"Bella. Promise me something. Be happy. Don't ever wonder if it would've worked out between us, just move on and be happy. You're beautiful, smart and funny. And I promise there is someone out there for you."

Yeah, him. I thought but continued crying as I listened to the message.

"I'll always sort of love you, Isabella Swan."

I let that last line sink in as the automated voice listed off my options for rehearing the message or deleting it or saving it.

"I'll always sort of love you, Isabella Swan."

Always. Sort of.

Leah ran to me and pulled me into her arms, "This is about that idiot isn't it?"

I nodded slowly, biting back a retort that my Edward wasn't an idiot.

"I swear that imbecile has commitment issues, he goes running off to Italy—"

"Italy!" I cut her off, "Italy! He never said he was going to Italy."

She snatched the phone out of my hands and pressed a key so that she could listen to the message he left me. She snorted, "He sounds like a wreck."

I stared at her hollowly, "What about Italy?"

"He got a job there. He didn't tell anyone about it—his flight was this morning. That sick idiot, he didn't tell you this?" She demanded, holding my phone in her fist.

She put the phone back to her ear and then narrowed her eyes, "I'm deleting this message; you shouldn't have to listen to this."

"No!" I screeched and grabbed the phone out of her hands.

She looked at me, bemused.

I listened to the message over again, memorizing it like I'd memorized his letter in the front of Wuthering Heights. "He said he loves me."

"He said he sort of loves you." Leah responded, crossing her arms tightly across her chest.

"But he still said he loves me," I pointed out, grasping onto anything. I felt like there was a storm coming and the wind was going to blow me away unless I was firmly secured to something.

Maybe Edward was the wind that would sweep me away.

"Bella, that guy's a jerk."

"He kissed me," I said, trying to tether myself to something. Anything at all.

"So what, he's a guy. They do lusty stuff like that," she replied, pissed off on my behalf. I should've been flattered that she was on 'my side', but really I just wanted to talk to Edward calmly and rationally and see what the heck was going on.

I finally got Leah to calm down and I left the hospital. Still a little numb, growing a little angry and definitely in desperate need of a good tête-à-tête with Edward Masen-Cullen.

My father met me at the door, a stern expression on his face.

"You are not giving that boy a third chance," he said gruffly.

"Did Leah call you?" I asked, narrowing my eyes at him.

"Yes."

"You can't tell me what to do, I'm an adult," I said haughtily.

"He's just going to keep running away," Charlie said.

"No he's not," I said, "I love him, Daddy."

Charlie paled, I'm sure that no father really wants to hear that their baby has fallen in love. And it only added insult to injury that I'd fallen for a flaky doctor who was currently in Europe.

I sighed and brushed past my father and ran up the stairs to my bedroom. I called back the number of the missed call from Edward.

"Hello?" He asked on the first ring. He sounded confused.

"Edward," I breathed and then started crying.

"No, Bella. Please, please, don't cry," he pleaded.

"I'm sorry," I mumbled.

He cursed, "I should be the one apologizing. Please, I'm so sorry Bella I would've stayed in Forks if I could."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"I already signed the contract before the date. God, Bella, I wished I hadn't," he said, his voice was rough, thick with emotion.

"It's ok, how long is your contract for?" I asked.

"Four years," he sighed.

Four years, it felt like eternity. "Edward, do you love me?" It felt like a question I shouldn't ask. Taboo.

"Yes," he breathed, "I know it's ridiculous. And I'm uselessly afraid of love. And I barely know you…"

"Shut up," I said.

"Excuse me?"

"Shut up, stop rambling, I love you too."

There was silence on the other line and I was terribly afraid that I'd scared him off. "I love you so much," he finally said.

"We can make this work," I said, more to convince myself than to convince him.

"Yes, not all long-distance relationships are doomed," he said.

"I'll come visit you," I told him, "over breaks, will you come home to visit?"

"Yes," he breathed. "I want this to work Bella…but, I'm scared."

"I know, Edward."

And then as an afterthought I added, "Me too."

* * *

**FINALLY!!! They're finally making things work! So this story is sort of winding down. The last chapter will be posted on next Friday.**

**Do you thin long-distance relationships are a bad idea [in general not just for the purposes of this story]? I think if people are serious about each other distance shouldn't matter because they'll find ways to be together.**


	27. Italian I Love You's

**Chapter 27: Italian I Love You's**

"_Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best of every person, its hopes are fadeless under all circumstances, and it endures everything [without weakening]. Love never fails [never fades out or becomes obsolete or comes to an end]."  
__-I Corinthians 13:7-8 [The Amplified Bible]_

Bella and I talked for hours. I sat in my empty apartment in Volterra, talking to Bella until my cell phone battery died.

I missed her; it felt like I'd left my heart behind.

But Carlisle was right.

There is hope.

And just like that, time passed. Bella and I called each other every night and every morning. I bought her a webcam and so we video chatted with each other and our bond grew.

Suddenly, without warning, it was April and I'd been gone four months. I wanted so badly to go visit Bella. I missed my family, yes, but Bella. It felt like having a pen-pal that you wanted to meet.

I'd truly fallen in love with her over the past months but I still yearned for physical contact with her. I was a man, and I wanted her. The memory of that one kiss was not going to sustain me for long.

I craved Bella.

Like a drug addict craves his next fix, I coveted Bella. I needed her, I was intoxicated with her.

I stayed up for hours after our phone calls ended, figuring out ways to break my contract with Aro. I couldn't be negligent in my job to get fired, if I did so then people's lives would be in jeopardy and I wasn't willing to let someone die to just be with the woman I loved.

I had yet to think of anything and I knew that if Aro found out I was trying to break my contract he would make my name mud in the medical community.

It was a useless endeavor.

One morning, the orange, Italian sun streamed into my window and I sighed, staring at my ceiling, waiting for Bella's daily morning phone call. She always called me before I went to work, even though we had a time difference, she stayed up late or got up early just to call me.

I waited. And waited.

And waited. And she didn't call.

I called her but there was no answer.

I went to work feeling empty and sad. What was wrong with my Bella? Why hadn't she called?

By evening I was practically beside myself with worry. When had I turned into such a woman?

By nightfall I still hadn't heard from her, even though I'd called her cell phone a dozen times.

I fell asleep restlessly, clutching my cell phone to my chest as a small child would hold a beloved toy.

When I woke up the next morning my bed was too warm. And I felt cramped for some bizarre reason.

I rolled over and rubbed the sleep out of my eyes with one fist. My sheets were tangled over my legs and for a brief moment I thought that was what was making me so hot and then I saw her.

Bella Swan, lying fully clothed on the bed next to me.

She yawned and stretched and looked me in the eye, "I didn't want to wake you last night."

I stared at her, shocked. What the heck was she doing in Italy?

"What are you doing here?"

"I missed you. And my family was sick of me moping so they bought me a plane ticket," she said, biting her bottom lip as a delicious blush covered her cheeks. "Is this alright?"

I didn't even answer I just gathered her into my arms and pressed my lips against hers with such urgency that it scared me.

We lay in my bed for the better part of the morning, kissing, touching and loving each other. She was very adamant that we not go too far, and I was comfortable with taking things slowly between us.

At about four we both got hungry so I took her out, abundantly happy. It was such a turn around from our first date and how we'd both felt afterwards. We were happy, and in love. I never thought that I would be in love.

Bella and I sat on the patio of a small café, sipping coffee and eating bagels even though it was dinner time.

"Have you thought about your contract any more?" Bella asked, running her fingertips over the lips of her coffee mug.

I sighed and rubbed my face with the palms of my hands, "I just—I can't think of anything to do."

"Can't you just quit?" She asked, pleadingly.

"If I do, then Aro will probably make it into some sort of scandal and no prominent hospital will ever hire me," I told her. I knew exactly what Aro would do, he'd create some fictional child that had died tragically on my watch and the medical community would frown on Doctor Masen-Cullen.

"Then you could just start your own practice, right?" She asked hopefully. "I saw it on a TV show over the summer."

I stared at her, my mind working, "It'd be a lot of hard work—and we'd be broke." I said very seriously.

A blinding smile broke over her face, and I wondered why poverty made her so happy.

"Why are you smiling like that, we'd be poor," I told her again, but nothing I said could wipe the smile off her face.

"You said 'we', Edward. Not 'I', 'we'. 'We'd' be poor," she said softly, "I don't care, just so long as there is a 'we'."

I smiled too, now that I realized exactly what she was smiling about. I hadn't realized it but I guess I had been using that pronoun in my head for a while. I didn't know the exact moment that 'I' became 'we', but it did.

Somehow Bella had worked her way into my heart.

I'd hated her at first, feared her. She would be my demise, I'd thought. But she wasn't. She was my cure.

My everything. She would be my everything.

I started making plans then, everything had to be perfect. I knew exactly what I was going to do, I just had to figure out a way to pull it off.

And the first step in the process would be to get out of Volterra.

We ate in companionable silence for a while before Bella spoke up, "Do you remember the fortune you gave me?"

I choked on my bagel, "What?"

"The fortune," she said.

Was she a mind reader? "No, what fortune?"

"The one in my book, I thought you put it in there when you returned it to me," she said, confused.

I was confused, too. What was she talking about? "Bella, I have no idea what you're talking about."

"When you returned my book to me, there was a fortune from a fortune cookie inside of it, it said, 'The one you love is closer than you think'."

I stared at her, wondering what higher power had brought us together in such a fairytale-like fashion. "I don't remember putting that in your book."

She stared at me, "You must have."

I thought hard about it, "I got a fortune cookie that night when we were both at the Chinese restaurant, but I don't remember what it said. I thought I threw it away."

She smiled at me, "I guess some higher power knew we were going to be together, then."

"Do you think that that higher power should've just let us been together and told me not to be an idiot in the beginning?"

She laughed and got up out of her chair. She sat down in my lap, I loved having her so close; she was a warm, welcome weight. Bella leaned her forehead against mine and kissed me slowly, languidly.

"Even though the beginning to this relationship was rough, I wouldn't trade it for anything. You want to know why?"

I really didn't, but I asked anyway, to humor her.

"Because, we both had things we needed to work out in the beginning—but in the end, everything we both did brought us closer together. We were always closer than we thought."

I smiled at her and massaged my hands over the small of her back, just under her shirt. Her skin was soft and warm.

She buried her face into the crook of my shoulder, and I could feel her planting soft kisses on my neck. She stopped for a moment and said, "Did you know you were my first kiss?"

I jerked back, "No, I didn't know that."

She nodded, "I wasn't very popular in high school. Boys thought I was weird."

I smiled, "Good. I don't like that idea that anyone else has kissed you."

"But I wasn't your first kiss," she said, her bottom lip tugging out.

I kissed her, smiling, "You'll be my last kiss, though."

* * *

**I'm afraid I was a little unclear in the last chapter. There still are a couple of chapters left in this story. The last chapter of this story will be posted on Friday of next week, but I will still update on Monday and Wednesday. There are two chapters left after this and an epilogue.**

**Oh! This is random, but when Bella says something about starting a private practice because she saw it on TV she's talking about "Royal Pains" the USA show that came on this summer... I got obsessed with it! [laughs]**

**Who expected her to show up in Italy? I know a couple of my faithful reviewers did. So kudos to you guys who figured it out!**


	28. Let's Go Back

**Chapter 28: Let's Go Back**

"_Your body needs to be held and to hold, to be touched and to touch. None of these needs is to be despised, denied, or repressed. But you have to keep searching for your body's deeper need, the need for genuine love. Every time you are able to go beyond the body's superficial desires for love, you are bringing your body home and moving toward integration and unity."  
__-Henri Nouwen_

Edward and I stayed up late talking and fell asleep kissing. Which I must admit was a wonderful way to fall asleep. And a wonderful way to wake up. My lips centimeter's from Edward's as I lay in his arms. His bed smelled like him—as did the shirt of his that I was wearing.

I was still worried, though.

I didn't want Edward to give up this prestigious position just because of me, but the way he spoke about it made it sound like he didn't really want to do it after all.

I resolved to ask him about it once he woke up. But I was content to just watch him sleep.

I toyed with the hem of his shirt, tracing my fingers across the scars on his stomach. He'd told me once, over the phone, about them.

He told me about the car accident that had taken his parents prematurely, and we both talked about how it had hurt him and made him feel isolated from romantic love. We talked about my mom and my abandonment issues.

And we both realized that we could work through our problems. Together.

Together, we could do anything.

We. When he had said that yesterday, I felt like my heart had soared. Edward and I were a unit. Two halves of one whole.

"Good morning," Edward groaned, pulling me out of my thoughts.

"Morning," I replied lightly, kissing him gently on the lips. "I have a question for you."

"Oh?" I asked, quirking one eyebrow.

"If you didn't have me—"

"I don't like where this is going," he said, cutting me off.

I glared and continued, "If you didn't have me, would you give up this position?"

He didn't respond sarcastically, or tell me that it wasn't worth worrying about. He thought it about it quietly for a while and finally replied. "I don't know. Things were different before you. I was different before you. If I didn't have you I wouldn't have anything to live for. I would have come here and been a zombie.

"But I have you now. And things are different. I'd be miserable here without you, and I'm miserable here with you."

"What if I moved here, to Italy and lived with you while you worked?" I asked, not wanting him to give up on his work because of me.

He shook his head and smiled, "You'd miss your family. And besides I miss my family. Who would've thought that I'd actually miss Alice meddling my life?"

We both laughed, because that was exactly what Alice did.

"I'm going to go into Aro's office today—you're coming with me—and I'm telling him that I quit. I don't care if he blacklists me."

I sighed, "I can't convince you to keep this job?"

"Nope," he replied and kissed the tip of my nose.

I wasn't going to argue with him.

We got dressed slowly, flirting with each other and talking so it took a lot longer than normal. Edward wore a pressed, white button down and a pair of charcoal slacks.

I hadn't brought anything that looked too formal so I settled on my nicest pair of jeans and a blouse and tennis shoes. Edward laughed and said that I looked like an uppity soccer mom.

I kicked him in the butt and told him to put on a tie.

We made our way slowly to the hospital. Edward was nervous, and admittedly so was I.

We walked hand in hand, tightly grasping each other's fingers.

"I feel like we're walking in front of the firing squad," Edward joked.

I smiled for him, but I didn't say anything because the butterflies in my stomach were making me feel sick and I didn't want to open my mouth.

Edward let go of my hand and wrapped his arm around my shoulder. I put both of m arms around his waist. We held tightly to each other, as we walked into the hospital.

The nurses greeted Edward and glared at me. He spoke to them in Italian and I was embarrassed that I found it so sexy that he'd learned Italian.

Aro's office was at the end of a dark corridor. There wasn't much light and I wondered absently why there were no windows and why the lights were so dim.

"This is creepy," I whispered.

"You're telling me," he whispered back. I smiled for him and squeezed his waist.

He knocked on Aro's door.

An elderly voice responded in Italian.

Edward pushed the door open and ushered me in.

"Ah, young Edward, what brings you to my office—and who is this lovely young lady?"

Aro was tall and very old and wrinkly, he ghosted around the edge of his desk and took my free hand into his, place a small kiss on the back of my hand.

"Aro, this is Bella, she's the love of my life," Edward responded, not looking at Aro—just staring into my eyes. I liked how he'd introduced me. Not as his girlfriend, as the love of his life. Love of his life.

I liked the sound of that.

"Ah, Bella it means beautiful," Aro said. He smiled, and I cringed a little. No wonder Alice thought this man was a pedophile or a pervert. His smile sent chills down my spine.

"Actually Aro, we were hoping to talk to you."

"About what?" Aro asked, his dark eyes sweeping between the two of us, "Neither of you has done anything irresponsible I hope."

I blushed instantly. We hadn't even done anything, I felt like it was very rude of this man to assume things about our relationship.

"Well, Aro, actually I wish to request a transfer back to Forks; so I can be closer to my Bella," Edward said coolly.

"Well, Edward, a transfer will not happen. You signed a contract to work at this hospital for four years, and then we can discuss your moving to another location." Aro said, narrowing his eyes and frowning. The deep creases in his face made him look ancient, like one of those old, dry mummies excavated from under the sand in Egypt.

"Then I must inform you that I can no longer work here, Aro," Edward said smoothly.

"Has there been trouble?" Aro asked, his brow furrowing.

"No," Edward replied, "I just want to go back to the States. I miss my family and I wish to be there with them, again."

Aro's eyes narrowed, "I'm sorry, Edward, but I cannot allow you to just quit. It will break your contract."

"I know, Aro, and I'm terribly sorry. But I have to go back home, I don't belong here," Edward said evenly, undaunted by the terrifying man standing in front of us.

"This is an awful decision, Edward. No one will hire you if you've given up," Aro threatened, shaking a fist at Edward.

I tried to take a step backwards but Edward held me tightly.

"I don't care if anyone hires me," Edward said, fishing around in his pockets for his hospital ID, he tossed it on Aro's desk. "I really don't care. I want to go back home—spend time with my parents, and one day marry this woman. I'm sorry that I couldn't do this job."

With that Edward held me tighter against his side and pulled me out of the room. Aro shouted after us in Italian and Edward ushered me quickly through the hallways.

He said something in Italian to a nurse at the station near the elevator and then we were safe inside of the elevator, staring at each other both a little mystified by what had just happened.

"I can't believe you just quit your job," I told him.

He laughed and stared at me, "I can't believe I just quit my job, either."

"What are we going to do?" I asked him.

"Well, first I'm going to go get something to eat, and then I'm going to call my parents, and then I'll get myself a ticket back to Seattle, and then we'll live happily ever after." He declared his eyes bright and happy.

The elevator doors slid open and we stepped out, hand-in-hand, ready to face the day. Edward smiled and fished around in his pocket for his phone.

He dialed a number and then put the phone on speaker.

"Hello?" Someone answered.

"Hi, Carlisle," Edward said.

"What's up, son?" Carlisle Cullen asked, he had a very smooth, English accent.

"I'm coming home…Dad," Edward said. The way he said 'dad' made me feel like he didn't call Carlisle 'dad' very often.

"Edward, what did you do?" Carlisle asked after a moment of silence.

"I told Aro I quit. I want to come home," he said, sounding very much like a little boy.

"Good," Carlisle breathed, "I'll try to get you your job back at the hospital."

"Good luck," Edward said, "Aro told me that no one would ever hire me because I broke his contract."

"Forks will hire you," Carlisle said, "the Cullen family is an integral part of the hospital, it would be very hard for them to say 'no' to me."

Edward laughed, "Dad, I'll talk to you later. I've actually got a wonderful visitor here with me."

"Ah, tell Bella 'hello' for us," Carlisle said and the line disconnected.

Edward smiled and pocketed his phone. "So that went better than expected."

"Yes, yes it did." I told him.

"I feel like I can take on the world," he said softly.

"You can," I told him. Because he could.

* * *

**I love these last couple of chapters. I'm a hopeless romantic so these lovey-dovey chapters always get me. :) **

**Ok, I've set a goal for this story. I want to get more reviews than Seven Brides for Seven Brothers. 7B47B has about 488 reviews. This has about 430-ish. So let's beat Seven Brides!! **

**Are you sad to see this story end? I am, I've enjoyed this story and reading people's reactions to it.**


	29. Fortune Cookies

**Chapter 29: Fortune Cookies**

"_What you are as a single person, you will be as a married person, only to a greater degree. Any negative character trait will be intensified in a marriage relationship, because you will feel free to let your guard down -- that person has committed himself to you and you no longer have to worry about scaring him off."  
__-Josh McDowell_

Quitting in Volterra had been one of the best and worst decisions of my life. Worst because before our plane touched down at Sea-Tac Airport, Forks Hospital had received a rather vicious phone call from Volterra. Best because Forks apparently loves me and they put Aro in his place, so to speak—and they welcomed me back with open arms, like the prodigal son.

I spent the next month searching for an apartment so I could move out of my parent's house. My father and I had finally found one that was big enough for two and I was getting ready to move into it.

I worked days, and spent nights with Bella, I played basketball with Seth and Charlie, I tormented Alice by wearing mismatching clothing; and I tried to get into the habit of calling Carlisle and Esme 'Mom' and 'Dad'.

And I did the most important thing I could ever do.

I made a life changing decision.

And hopefully Bella would agree.

I had everything planned out, Alice had helped me work everything out, and I was excited to see how things would unfold.

I hoped Bella would see the significance in the events.

It was late May and we had a date that evening.

I took my time dressing, thinking back over my relationship with Bella. The first time I saw her at the Chinese restaurant, and then how I'd been so intrigued by her.

And then our failed date, and my subsequent sulking.

And then the nights I spent talking to her over the phone, praying that I could get out of Volterra, and she'd just shown up there. I knew then that I wanted her to be mine. Forever.

That was all I could offer her.

I buttoned a neat gray shirt and left it untucked. Alice sat on the corner of my bed, nodding in approval.

"So you're really going to do it?" She asked.

I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair, "Yeah I am."

"Good luck, big brother," she said softly.

I kissed the top of her head before snatching my keys from my bedside table. "Thanks, Ali."

"Love you, Edward," she called after me as I ran down the stairs.

"Love you, too," I yelled back, jumping over the last four stairs and running out to the garage.

Emmett and Rosalie were over—playing with Carlisle's Mercedes—and, I guess to lend moral support.

Peter ran up to me and hugged my legs, "Hey buddy."

"Uncle Edward," he declared, as I pulled him into my arms and kissed his cheek.

He smiled at me, showing off the dimples he'd inherited from his father, "Uncle Edward go see Bella?" He asked.

"Yeah, I'm going to go see Bella," I told him. Peter had taken a liking to Bella, probably because the one time we'd babysat for him Bella had fed him chocolate. Bella was a goddess in his eyes.

Mine too, actually.

"Ok, Pete, let's let Uncle Edward go, it's an important night tonight," Emmett said, winking at me.

I smiled nervously, butterflies suddenly assaulting my stomach.

Rosalie and my father gave me hugs and encouraging words as I walked to my Volvo. I took a deep breath and started the car.

The drive to Bella's was a lot faster than normal, or it felt like it was a lot faster. I was so preoccupied, though.

Bella hopped into the passenger seat of my Volvo a bright smile on her face, "So where are we going tonight?"

"It's a surprise," I replied, tightening my grip on the steering wheel and pulling out of her driveway.

I drove slowly, trying to get a hold of myself.

Bella rubbed my thigh, "Is everything ok?"

I jumped a little, "I'm alright."

She nodded and gave me a dry look, "Sure you are."

I sighed and continued driving. Bella knew I was tense about something, I just wished that it wouldn't give away the surprise.

When I pulled into the parking lot Bella gave me a wry look, "The Chinese restaurant, really?"

I shrugged, "It has significance."

Bella nodded and smiled, "So how's work?"

"It's good," I said.

We talked about work and her school as we walked hand-in-hand to the front doors of the restaurant.

I took a deep breath and opened the door for her. The petite, Asian hostess seated us at an intimate booth. No one else was in the restaurant because I had rented the entire space for the evening. That way we wouldn't be interrupted or interloped upon.

Bella smiled at me as she slid into the booth beside me.

The first time I'd taken her on a date when we got back from Italy we'd sat across from each other and then decided that we had been apart for too long and didn't want to have any space between us. Needless to say we sat next to each other on all of our other dates.

Bella rested her head on my shoulder as we waited for the waitress to come to our table.

"What can I get you guys to drink?" She asked.

"We'll both have Cokes," I told the waitress with a smile, "and we both plan on eating from the buffet."

She nodded and told us to help ourselves.

I helped Bella up and kept my arm around her waist as we piled fake Chinese food onto our plates. We sat back down and both started eating.

"So seriously Edward, what's the matter?" Bella asked around a mouthful of beef lo mien.

"Nothing's wrong," I told her.

Nothing really was wrong, I was just terrified, but I wasn't going to tell her that.

She nodded and didn't pursue the subject further, for which I was grateful.

We ate quietly, occasionally feeding each other food and kissing. It was a good dinner, and I was hopeful that we could spend many more like that in the future.

Finally we had both eaten our fill and the waitress brought us our bill along with a single fortune cookie.

I took a deep breath and handed to her, "You eat it, I'm too full."

"So am I," she pouted, pushing it away.

I had a moment of complete and utter terror that she wouldn't take the cookie, "How about we split it?" I asked, trying to keep my voice even.

"Alright," she said, ripping apart the clear, plastic wrapping.

She broke the cookie in half and handed me one half. She held the other in her hand and turned the fortune over so she could read it.

"What's it say?" I asked, my stomach contracting.

"It's says, 'Will you mar—'…Oh my God, Edward?" She turned to look at me, tears shining in her eyes.

I smiled at her tentatively and slid out of the booth and down to one knee. I fumbled in my pocket for the ring and then finally opened the little velvet box to show it to her.

It was my mother's engagement ring. And I hoped she would like it.

She started crying and threw her arms around my shoulders.

I embraced her and stroked her hair, "Is this a yes?"

"Oh my gosh, of course this is a yes!" She exclaimed, kissing all over my face.

I chuckled and took her hands in mine. I slid the ring onto her finger and she stared at it.

"It was my mother's engagement ring," I told her softly, "there's a matching wedding band that I hope you'll wear as well."

"Of course I will Edward, I'd be honored," she said quietly, silent tears rolling down her cheeks.

I did the best I could to dry them with the sleeve of my shirt.

She pushed my hand away and then pulled me into her arms and kissed me.

This amazing, forgiving, beautiful woman was going to be my wife. I was suddenly overwhelmed with happiness. I stood up and twirled her around, laughing.

Finally.

After everything that had happened in my life I finally had my Happily Ever After. They do exist. It's not just in fairy tales.

Even a broken little boy can be fixed and find happiness in a girl who is completely and utterly amazing.

I'll never understand how I deserved such happiness after shunning everything good and lovely in the world. I guess my parents were looking out for me, they knew I needed to find Bella.

Every place I went brought me closer to Bella. Everything Bella did and had to endure was to bring her closer to me.

So, I won't say that after the proposal everything was all right. We still had problems, like any other couple, but we got through them.

Because above all else, at the end of the day, Bella was mine and I was hers. And that's all that ever really mattered.

* * *

**The end. Except for the epilogue that will be posted on Friday. ;) OK, because I've had a couple people talk to me about this: THERE WILL BE NO SEQUEL. I repeat, NO SEQUEL. I don't want to hear any whining about it. **

**I've had the proposal scene planned since the beginning of this story. This story was going to be a one-shot of Bella and Edward in a Chinese restaurant and he was going to propose to her that way...but I just got carried away writing it, and this is what happened!**

**And, we've almost beat Seven Brides for Seven Brothers. Got about 20 [give or take a few] reviews to go!! **

**Who expected this to end with a proposal? I did. ;)**


	30. Epilogue

**Epilogue**

"_Everything she does is beautiful,  
__Everything she does is right.  
_'_Cause it's you and me and all of the people,  
__With nothing to do, nothing to lose,  
__And it's you and me and all of the people,  
__And I don't know why I can't keep my eyes off of you."  
__-"You and Me" by Lifehouse_

I stood staring at Edward as he fidgeted with the buttons on his jacket. He met my eyes tentatively and smiled. I fingered the bouquet I was holding and blushed.

The vows were quick and simple and made me cry. In the end the deal was sealed with a kiss.

I was actually rather glad that the ceremony had gone that quickly, I just wanted to get out of the ridiculous strappy sandals that the bridesmaids were being made to wear and go sit with Edward.

Charlie and Sue were declared a married couple and they walked down the sandy aisle, holding each other's hands tightly like they didn't believe they just got married.

The only people in the bridal party were me, Leah and Seth so the three of us walked down the aisle together, after our now-united parents.

It was a little surreal, seeing my father get married. I was so happy for him.

I hadn't realized I was crying until Edward came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist, kissed the tears tracks on my cheeks and whispered in my ear, "That will be us soon."

I smiled at him and gave him a quick kiss, "I can't wait to be Mrs. Masen-Cullen."

"I can't wait for you to be Mrs. Masen-Cullen, either," he told me, placing several kisses over the column of my neck.

"I love you," I told him, turning in his arms so that I was facing him.

"As I love you," he said.

We kissed and the bonfire was lit, and everyone gathered around to dance and to roast marshmallows and to be all lovey-dovey.

Edward danced with Sue while I danced with Charlie. We all sat around on driftwood and ate chocolate.

I looked around at all of the guests. I had to smile as I saw Leah dancing with Charlie's fishing buddy's son.

Seth was dancing with Sue, and everyone was having a good time.

I leaned against Edward's chest and listened to his heart beat, a slow steady rhythm.

There was a time in my life when I didn't think happiness existed. And I was dead wrong. Happiness does exist. And anyone can attain it. You just have to look in the right place.

And if I could leave you with one final piece of advice, it would be:

_The one you love just may be a lot closer than you think. Mine was._

* * *

**Who thought it was their wedding? ;) **

**I know, it's short and it doesn't really tell you guys much about their future. But just imagine that they lived happily ever after and had a lot of little bronze-haired babies. **

**And now that this story is done, this is where I tell you guys: I HAVE A NEW STORY COMING OUT SOON!! It's going to be A LOT different than anything I've written before. A little more mature have some more drama, romance, adventure, deception, ect. ;) But you'll just have to wait and see. If you guys really want me to I'll post a teaser of it on this story. **

**Anyway, thanks to everyone who REVIEWED!! We beat SEVEN BRIDES FOR SEVEN BROTHERS!! Everybody deserves many hugs and thank-you's because you guys are awesome!! **


	31. NEW STORY PREVIEW

**Thank you so much to everybody who made FORTUNE COOKIES a success! I was so pleased with the reaction it recieved!  
You guys are seriosly amazing.  
Seriously.  
So, a couple of people have expressed intrest in a teaser for my new story. I still haven't written as much of it as I want. I've written through the 13 chapter. But I want to get a little further until I start posting it regularly.  
I estimate it will probably be around the end of October, maybe the second to last week of October that I will put the new story up.  
If I'm not already on your author's alert and you want to be notified when I post this new story, go to my profile and add me!! :)**

**This story is going to be a little more mature than some of my other stories.  
No, there aren't explicit sex scenes or anything like that, but there is 'adult language' in the story.  
Now, it's not really horrible language. There will be no f-bombs. That's just not how I roll. But the content of the story is geared towards a more mature audience. It's not tasteless and ridiculous, but it is a story about adults and they act like adults.  
The subject matter is a more mature, but there are still lighthearted parts. There will be A LOT of emo chapters in the new story... But it's about unrequited love, and that constitutes emo chapters. Deal with it.  
****I don't really want to say much more and give away more of the story...but here's the preview.**

**I hope you guys enjoy this sneak peak of...**

**Screw You, eHarmony**

And somewhere between sharing peanut-butter and jelly sandwiches when I first moved to Forks in the first grade and sharing secrets and spit in junior high, I fell in love with her—and she fell in love with seemingly every other boy in the great state of Washington…besides me.

But I've waited patiently for her.

And so that fateful day, when she declared that she was tired of dating duds, I saw my window of opportunity.

I would step up and be her knight in shining armor. I wanted to tell her how I felt. As she went on about relationships and dating in general, I formulated my plan—but I hadn't realized that she would crush that plan to smithereens.

"Hey, have you seen those commercials for that new website?" She asked, leaning her head against my shoulder as we watched TV together late that fateful night.

"No," I told her, running my fingers through her long, brownish red hair.

"Well it—" she began to say but her words were cut off as her eyes wandered back to the screen, "Oh here it is, watch it and tell me what you think!"

So I watched it.

The commercial showed a perfectly happy couple, kissing and hugging while standing under apple trees. The smooth, generic announcer voice came over the speakers, "Are you tired of dating? Are you looking for a deeper connection?"

I wanted to scream 'YES', but I refrained and watched her commercial.

I really wasn't paying attention to the ridiculous dating site commentary, more the happy couples prancing across the screen. That could be us. That would be us, but then she turned to me and said, "My friend Angela signed up for that sight and the guy they matched her with is really nice, they're thinking of getting married."

And then she dropped the bomb, "I'm going to sign up. I'm tired of being alone."

Oh no. Hell no. My girl was going to find a boyfriend on the Internet?

But, I couldn't stop her.

**Questions, Comments, Concerns?  
You see that lovely little box that says "REVIEW" you can click that and talk to me.  
No, I will not answer questions about the plot. Sorry guys, if you're interested in the plot--just read this baby when it comes out. ;)**


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